Doing Just Fine

[Sally]

I'd like to start by saying hi to all of my wonderful friends here. As you have noticed from some of my recent posts, the marriage that I tried so haed to preserve has ended. I had even stopped transitioning (not on hormones - yet!) to try to save the marriage. I had lived 57 years this way, so I was willing to sacrifice my inner peace and try a while longer. That wasn't good enough for her family so she is gone.

I spent one weekend evaluating the situation and came to the conclusion that being free of her family was worth any price. They told her and evry one else what to do, how and when. I hadn't seen my family on any holiday as major as Goundhog Day since we were engaged. She consulted with them before me whenever we were making plans, so as a beautiful country ballad from the 80s said, "Thank God and Greyhound, she's gone!" I am now free to go on with my life. As soon as the ink is dry on the Divorce Papers - I'm on hormones! My therapist has told me that she would write the letter as soon as I found a doctor.

I will finally be able to go forward as my true self, no fear of losing any one now - she's already gone.

Just wanted to let all of you know that I'm OK. I've received a lot of PMs about it so I wanted to answer everyone at once. You can still send PMs if you like - I love mail! And when it comes from friends that understand how I feel, it is marvelous - I'll answer every one.

Love ya all,

Sally

[Guest Donna Jean]

Hey look, Sally......the sun's coming out...what a beautiful day!

Gee...I feel GOOD for you!

All my best wishes.....

XXOO

Donna Jean

[Guest Karen-1954]

Good luck, sometimes things work out for the best, no matter how hard we try.

Hugs,

Karen

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Hey - you are as old as me? I am struggling with outing to a very good woman - I AM on HRT and she isn't happy. Old age and diabetes have kept our sex life limited to other types of stimulation - for five years. I have finally gotten her to accept that chemical castration and a little soft tissue development will be worth me losing all that unhappiness and aggression she has had to share with me so long.

I lost my middle marriage (okay - so I marry a lot - I really admire womanlyness) - when I confessed, age 44 or so, that I was a cross dresser (wasn't aware at that time it went much deeper than that). She dumped me - hummmm.... maybe she didn't love me as much as I thought.

I wanted to say good riddence, at the time - but she did give me two wonderful children (now grown) so there was a positive side of that marriage as well. (My first wife died giving me my first child - also now grown).

I would really miss my sweet wife, and there is no guarantee she will stay the course. Hope so - but I am changing so much myself these days.

My point, hummmm. I am not sure. Having a transsexual 'husband' is very difficult on wives, I guess. But please understand that you may be rationalizing on the departure of your wife. When the reality of what happened sets in (maybe it won't - I can't know the exact details of your relationship) PLEASE remember we really don't have any choice being what we are. Transphobia comes from others - and it can be a very nasty thing. Maybe, like my second wife did with me, your wife didn't love you as much as you thought she did.

[Guest julia_d]

Congrats Sally. Sounds to me also that you are better off out of that kind of situation. How you put up with it for so long is a mystery. You must be a very strong tolerant and self sacrificing person to have what sounds like no life or self determination for these past however many years. The sun is upwards.. petals point that way It's nice coming out of the cave into the light.

I lost my marriage and my family a long time ago.. whatever. I found out she didn't love me, she loved the pay packet and not having to work and being supported without contributing. I worked, she spent it.

[Guest Rayne]

I'd like to start by saying hi to all of my wonderful friends here. As you have noticed from some of my recent posts, the marriage that I tried so haed to preserve has ended. I had even stopped transitioning (not on hormones - yet!) to try to save the marriage. I had lived 57 years this way, so I was willing to sacrifice my inner peace and try a while longer. That wasn't good enough for her family so she is gone.

I spent one weekend evaluating the situation and came to the conclusion that being free of her family was worth any price. They told her and evry one else what to do, how and when. I hadn't seen my family on any holiday as major as Goundhog Day since we were engaged. She consulted with them before me whenever we were making plans, so as a beautiful country ballad from the 80s said, "Thank God and Greyhound, she's gone!" I am now free to go on with my life. As soon as the ink is dry on the Divorce Papers - I'm on hormones! My therapist has told me that she would write the letter as soon as I found a doctor.

I will finally be able to go forward as my true self, no fear of losing any one now - she's already gone.

Just wanted to let all of you know that I'm OK. I've received a lot of PMs about it so I wanted to answer everyone at once. You can still send PMs if you like - I love mail! And when it comes from friends that understand how I feel, it is marvelous - I'll answer every one.

Love ya all,

Sally

First, I'm sorry things couldn't be worked out between you two. The help my wife has given me has been invaluable.

Second, I'm glad you're happy. More importantly, you're free to live as you wish and don't have to consult with anyone about the journey you're about to take.

Congrats,

Rayne

[Guest Evan_J]

I see you with shackles falling away and stepping into the sun. It may be a little stunning at first, and you could feel a little twinge of hesitancy at some points, but the bottom line of it will be that it is sun.

...and that was my one "poetic" moment for the next 4 years lol. I have no idea where it came from either.

[Guest Donna Jean]

Evan said..

I see you with shackles falling away and stepping into the sun. It may be a little stunning at first, and you could feel a little twinge of hesitancy at some points, but the bottom line of it will be that it is sun

Gees, Evan...that's beautiful..didn't know your were SO sentimental snif....

You're a peach

Donna Jean

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Just a note again - thanks for acknowleging my reply - glad you are fine because I worry about us girls - heck! I worry about myself all the time, why not every one else - grin - whew

This ain't easy - those pulpit types who claim this transsexuallity is a life style choice just have NO CLUE!

[Guest shyheather]

well i'm new here but i can tell you from expreince that thank god and gray hound is a wonder ful thing , found a supportivr gg not long after and she didn't get away .

best of luck