A not-so-simple hellow

[Guest Mizati]

So hi, I'm(Or I suppose i will be is more proper) Miz, Miza or Mizati, whichever you wanna call me is fine.

So, I'm 20, and I've pretty much known for certain I wanted to be a girl since I was 9 or 10, but because of my mostly-sheltered childhood I didn't even know sex changes were possible until I was 16. But here I am. I told my parents a bit more than a year ago, and neither are very supportive at all; my whole family, with the exception of me, are devout christians, and my mom takes every opportunity to point out that I'm a "man". Until recently I'd been unemployed for 2 years, and thankfully my new employer has an anti-discrimination policy that covers transgenders and gender expression, despite that the state I'm in doesn't anymore. The last year have not been easy in the least, as my mom likes to take opportunities to steal my makeup and what girl clothes I do have; at the moment I'm down to a bra and a shirt.

Thankfully all but 2 of my friends have been accepting of the whole thing, all but 3 of those told me they'd always thought I'd make a better girl than a guy anyway, and even some of my new coworkers are accepting about it.

Even though I never let it show, or really talk about it at all, it's really hard to keep it together emotionally. I regularly write rants, things I want to just scream at my mother, and after writing about 6 or 7 pages I crumple it all up, throw it away or burn it, take a deep breath and go about my day. I've got plans for all the money I make for the next 6-7 months planned out, and with any luck I'll be out on my own then(which is when my mom has said she'll give me my stuff back), and when I do I'm planning on mailing both my parents the Dear Dad, Love Maria video that's on youtube.

Well, that's about all I can think of at the moment, I'm sure I'll think of more eventually.

Tata for now, Mizati <3

[Guest ~Brenda~]

Welcome Mizati,

Welcome to Laura's sweetheart. You can rant here all you like. Transgendered support is why we are here. I do hope that things calm down with your parents. Being transgendered never goes away even if one tries to ignore it. Believe me I know and I have tried.

Your mother stealing your clothes seems a bit odd. If she still has them then why doesn't she give them back now? Remind your parents that they have choice....when you move out you can still be part of their lives, or if they continue teir current behvior then you will be lost to them forever.

Love.

Brenda

[Guest lairlane]

Mizati,

Welcome to Laura's Playground. You will find the freedom to share your thoughts and feelings here. It sounds like you have the beginnings of a plan and have thought about your identity for some time. Your transition is one element and your family will transition as well. We wish you success in your journey.

[Guest angels wings]

Hello Mizati welcome to Laura's I'm glad u found us . I'm sure u will find warmth and acceptance here . Your parents will take time to adjust and I hope they begin to learn more so they can grow with u in this journey. There is a forum here just for parents maybe they could have a look as a guest and see what others go through. It's hard to understand if u don't have the knowledge.realax and look around we are here for u . Please read the Terms and Conditions you will find this at the bottom right of each page . We ask all members to read this so they understand how Laura's runs . Again welcome Mizati

[Guest Mizati]

Ahh yes, Brenda, I never quite understood it myself. Shes never admitted to taking my makeup, but it only disappeared AFTER I told her and when my clothes started disappearing out of the drier. And as for the clothes, she says she'll give them back when I move out because it's one of those "You live in my house you'll abide by my rules" things. She pretty much said, and I think this jjust might be a quote, "You don't like my rules? Get your own house, then make your own rules", which is the main reason I'm trying to move out ASAP. The sooner I move out and build up some money the faster I can get on HRT and get the whole process started.

[Guest spunky monkey]

hi mizata,

its nice too meet you, if your mum is stealing your stuff must mean your doing something right, hope you move out soon so you can be your own person and the woman you have always known you were.

if you need too rant or want advice we are the girls too ask, we have been thru what your experiencing.

love rachelle

[Guest miss kindheart]

Hi Miz,

<<< hug >>>

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.

The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.

Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.

One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules.

We all look forward to seeing you.

vanna

[Guest Jess_k]

Welcome I hope you manage to get moved out soon, it sounds like you need it!

[Guest Weaver]

You should remind her of the ten commandments the next time she steals your stuff.

[KathrynJulia]

Hi Mizati:

For the present time just grin and bare it. After you move out and you don't call and you don't visit and your mom bugs you to call or visit, say mom, you know what, I'm living on my own now and make my own rules. You didn't respect me when I lived under your roof and now I'm living under my own means and rules. I don't come home to visit because until you treat me with respect and respect my feelings, I'll meet you somewhere neutral, but your home is your home and I respect that. Just leave it at that.

Taking your clothes is being disrespectful. Since you aren't parading around in front of them and are an adult, you have the right within reason to own your own possessions that you bought with money you earned yourself. Continue to treat your parents with respect even when they disrespect you. But live your own life on your own. Insist on being respected as you respect your folks. It's a two way street.

Welcome to Lauras Mizati, I'm Kathryn and I'm happy to welcome you to the Playgrown.