Should I and how?

[Guest Confused...]

Well, my Mum knows something is up, and I'm sick of hiding it. How do I tell her how I feel in a way that doesn't make a big deal about it? (And how do I get her to take me to a therapist...)

Do I accidentally leave a trail that leads to it?

Do I write a letter?

Do I just tell her face to face?

Do I text her?

And how do I say it?

Mum, honestly I feel like I want to be a girl sometimes, and I need to see someone about it?

Straight up tell her I'm transsexual, let her do whatever, etc???

Something Else???

Or should I just continue hiding, is it not something she needs to know???

Thanks...

[Guest Jenny_W]

Dear Confused,

I'm not in your situation so I can't tell you what you should do, except I do have a Mum and a Dad and I know what they mean to me. They are two of the most important people in my life and they are the ones who spent years doing parent stuff for me like looking after me when I was sick, going to school concerts, helping me grow into the person I am today and millions of other things. It was only when I became a parent myself that I truly started to understand and appreciate how much you invest emotionally into your kids.

If my daughter has something this important to tell me in the future, I like to think I'd listen and be supportive - no matter what it is. If she didn't feel comfortable telling me, I would be gutted.

Only you know your folks. If you decide to tell them, they may be shocked or not know what to say, but I hope that you can tell them somehow. I liked it when you said you wanted to say, "Mum, honestly I feel like I want to be a girl sometimes, and I need to see someone about it?". It's honest and I would like to think all parents are willing to help their kids, especially when it is so important to you.

Think it over. These people raised you from a little baby - wouldn't they just want you to be happy?

Jenny

[Guest Confused...]

Thank you, JennyCD...

I feel like I want to tell them, and I suppose my Mum would be ok, it's more my dad I'm worried about...

I was thinking "I honestly want to be a girl sometimes, and I think I should see someone about it" sounds honest aswell, and would shock them the least (I at all...) I might (if I pluck up the courage...) tell Mum tomorrow, and go from there...

[Charlize]

It is always hard to take those first steps but without them you will never follow your path. it may lead you in so many directions some that you can't imagine. But to start be honest and talk to the ones you love and ask for their help in finding your path. It will be hard for all but honesty in this case is worth it. I waited all my life and while i don't regret the life i have had i am glad it finally lead me to where i am in honesty and growth. Your Mum is a great place to start. Ask her for help and she will help i'm sure.

Hugs, Charlie

[Guest Jenny_W]

Confused,

Good luck. Speak your heart and hopefully your parents will see your sincerity and help you. I think one-on-one is a good strategy - you could even ask your Mum not to tell your Dad yet because you want to tell him yourself, when you find a good time. If you do this, don't leave him out of the loop for too long!

HUGS

Jenny

[Guest Confused...]

So... I couldn't do it. I wanted to say it but I couldn't bring myself to say anything...

Partly that was because I couldn't even be bothered to get out of bed until 11, and even then she almost had to drag me out... (lucky it's the school holidays...) When she asked me why I didn't want to get up, I claimed that was because "I lacked sufficient motivation" which is technically true, and she gave me an odd sort of look (the kind you get when you're not making any sense...)

Honestly, I've got what I want to say all organised in my mind, but I haven't plucked up the courage to tell her...

I guess there's always tomorrow...

[Charlize]

Yes tomorrow is out there. I waited until my 64th birthday. Sooner is better or just figure on hanging it up. I did that on and off for years and lived in the resulting horror. Its your move. Why wait? I have often said it takes testicles to wear a skirt in public. Laugh and move forward if you feel its time but don't stew in it. Let your higher power put the words together. You don't need to.

Hugs, Charlie