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We Know We'll be Safe Here - A beautiful UU story

Guest Mittens_kittens

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Guest BreanneB

Great stroy. If all spouses where that brave and welcoming. I think that is the one biggest regret in all this. The loss of my wonderful then wife. Now we are still best friends, but she has already moved on :(. Me im stuck in a rut

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Guest Lacey Lynne

Thank you for this marvelous story!

Know what? I'm within walking distance of a UU church now. I actually plan to go this Sunday. Why not, right?

Peace & Joy :friends: Lacey Lynne

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I never had an understanding spouse but I do attend a UU church and it is so accepting.

After my first visit I knew that this was a place that I felt at home.

While acceptance does not require understanding, I feel that most of the members are attempting to if not actually understand to at least empathize - so refreshing as compared to all of the 'condemning messages' from so many churches.

Love ya,


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Guest Mikkiapolis

I recently came out to everyone at my UU congregation. They were amazingly supportive. The senior minister even wrote an original "naming ceremony" to help recognize and honor my decision. She also suggested a support group of members who are helping both me and others by being there through this transition.

I present as female now 100% of the time there, and it feels like I'm in RLE (still months away for real).

Not sure if UU might be right for you? Find out for yourself with an independent opinion - take the Belief-O-Matic quiz!

Think you know it all already? Ok, here's a different quiz for you (I scored 73% - without using any reference materials).

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Guest Mittens_kittens


I'm curious to hear if you got to visit the UU church and, if so, what you thought. The first time I visited, I left thinking, "Now that wasn't anything like any church I've ever been to before." But it got me intrigued, and I kept wandering back every now and then to see just what it was all about. That was about five years ago, and I'm a regular now. I had no idea that my son was TG when we started going, but their response to his coming out announcement several months ago proved to me that it was not an accident that we were there.


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Wonderful story. I've been considering a church and have always heardgood things about UU.

I love this line from the story: But I try to remember the biggest lesson I’ve learned, because it happened over and over. If I risk being vulnerable and honest, I will almost always be rewarded with kindness, respect, and even love. Truth is a powerful force for good.

I have experienced this time and time again in the last 18 months. A lifetime of fear of exposure replaced by acceptance by others and myself. Go figure... :)


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  • 1 month later...
  • Forum Moderator

A dear woman friend who goes to UU brought my wife and i a copy of that article the day she found out about me. I think it really helped my wife to accept me as me. She is a neibor and was the first to show up on the door with open arms.

What a great article in my life esp.



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Guest Mittens_kittens

Thanks, Megan, for letting me know. I'm thrilled to hear that Lacey has found a spiritual place where she feels welcome. I have no doubt that her vivacious and generous spirit is giving as much or more back to that UU fellowship as she is receiving.


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UU and its members are wonderful people. I didn't even think about it until after I did talk to them (thought I was doing it because they'd been paying my daughter to help with home renovation when she was still male in public) but the neighbors whom I told first were UU people. They told me right off I should come to their church because there was at least one transperson and the community was so accepting. And I find that true in general of UU. The husband of a friend of mine had found a great deal of support there as a teenager when his dad divorced his mother because the dad finally came to terms with being gay, which in the 80's was probably pretty darn progressive, even in New Jersey.

I have to put in a plug for Episcopalian also. It's a bit more geographic (depends on the diocese and the particular parish) but I was so proud of them this summer when they voted for total inclusion for trans people. I haven't gone to church much in quite a while, but I told my priest about my brand-new daughter and she just listened and then hugged me. And said there was a kid in their youth group. And someone else said there was an adult as well. So I guess I'd better get myself back to church.

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Thank you for sharing such a warm welcoming story. Two of my best friends attend a UU church and when I told them that I was in transition. They were so accepting that it made me glad that I considered them such close personal friends.

I'm considering joining the Unitarian Church here in Columbia because I haven't felt complete acceptance in my current church for Transgendered parishioners. I may be wrong, but thats been my perception. Time will tell. Kathryn

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  • 6 months later...
Guest DearFountain

I know this thread is old but I wanted to add my recommendation for the UU congregation. I started going to one recently and it has been so welcoming and everyone is very kind and open. My particular congregation has a lot of activities like meditation classes, which I tend to go to more than the services, book clubs, poetry readings, and hiking trips. UU's are dedicated to social justice and are not only allies but advocates; they march at Pride and support legislation for the community.

I had not gone to church for years because I could never get through a service without taking offense or feeling cognitive dissonance. Now I feel comfortable with a congregation and the services make me feel good all day instead of conflicted. I don't typically talk about or recommend religion but if you are looking for a kind, welcoming, spiritual fellowship experience without the conflict and pressure of other churches, check them out.

Also: lovely story! I will maybe print it out and bring it to the pastor, I think she would appreciate it.

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