My life as Bobbie

[Guest BobbiLee]

Hello Ladies!!

I am new here and looking for support but not sure where to go. For starters and after looking around, I will introduce myself and tell you a little bit about me...my story, like so many on here is a little complicated but here goes, I hope I don't put you to sleep!!

When I was 5 or 6 I remember I wanted to be a princess for halloween. I remember my parents trying to talk me out of it but I was determined so they did let me. Looking back I am quite surprised they let me. I remember I loved the feel of having a dress on, I didn't know why, I just did.

I also remember having several conversations with my sister who was mad becasue I was not the baby sister she wanted. Again, I never weally thought about it much. As I got older I would sneak into my sister's and my mother's room and try on their clothes and I knew it not only felt good, it felt right.

To make a long story short I was forced (for lack of a better word) to be male as I entered puberty. I played baseball and football, played with Army men and GI Joes (secretly wishing they were Barbies (again, I did not realize that until now)). I went to college and became a teacher and coach and moved 2000 miles from home and I was by myself. I got a small apartment and remember going to JC Penney to buy clothes for the first time...boy was I nervous. Up to this point I used what ever I had access to, usually my GF's stuff and boy did I love it...(that is another story for another time).

Well, I ended up breaking up with her and got married to another lady about a year and a half later. At this point I my crossdressing was unknown except the suspicions from my GFwho caught me in her bra one day. When I joined the Navy and was in basic training I got the nerve up to tell my then wife in a letter about my desires of wearing a dress and being with her...she actually went out and bought a very pretty and sexy dress for me for when I graduated from basic. We were about the same size and she wore it for me when she visited me on parents & spouses day and told me she actually bought if for me. I was thrilled!! Of course I could not tell anyone in 1993.

Fast forward 5 years and we ended up divorcing. I was devistated but ironocally it was not becasue I wanted to be a female...it was still my fault but I will leave it at that. about a year later I remarried to my present wife. One night when I was tipsy, I tried to put on a dress as I had with my first wife, but this time I got a totally different response. She laughed and I was humiliated and tried to laugh it off. I did a pretty good job and chalked it up to the heavy drinking and a corny movie we were watching. She still brings it up every now and then but not very often and it has never come up in anger (thank God!). As a result, I have been in the closet for the most part other than chat rooms when they were still around. I have never "come out" to anyone but lately my feelings have really been resurfacing.

As far as my marriage to this wife, we have been married almost 16 years and we have 2 great kids 12 girl and 13 boy and both with special needs. She has one from her previous marriage. I am a former teacher/coach/athletic director and Army and Navy veteran.

Also, I can honestly say I have never ever felt the need to kill myself or do harm to myself (or others) as a result of my feelings. As I have researched transitioning I see that is obviously not always the case.

Well, I hope I have not put anyone to sleep with a long intro, but I am looking forward to getting to know you!!

Hugs!!

Bobbi

[KathrynJulia]

Hello Bobbi

Welcome to Laura's. Your introduction was an excellent one and introduces you well. It is a normal for people to question where they fall in the gender spectrum and believe me, it is quite a wide spectrum. You also sound hesitant to come out to your wife, also understandable. It sounds like you have a nice family.

We stand ready Bobbi to answer your questions, offer you support and provide you with any resources or advice that you may need. It's all up to you. There is never any pressure on this site. We want you to be whomever you feel comfortable with. Take your time. Learn all you can from us, and never rush into anything that you are unsure of.

For many people it takes years understanding what part mother nauture has played in making you well you.

Now I need to call to your attention a tab down towards the bottom of the page on the right side. It's the Terms and Conditions of this site. We welcome everyone from teens to members who are like me, a spring chicken, who feel they have gender issues. To keep the site safe for kids, the Terms and Conditions are rules of what is allowed to be posted. This is a moderated site and all posts are read and approved by myself or one of the other moderators.

Bobbi, I want to express a warm welcome to you and hope you explore to your heart's content, ask questions, and please feel free to share your thoughts with the community. I'm KathrynJulia and welcome to the playground.

[Guest angels wings]

Hello Bobbi Welcome to Laura's

Thank you for your introduction I'm sure you will find many members here you will be able to relate to. Relax and enjoy you are amongst people who understand we have differnt forums with great information . When you feel comfortable you can add your comments to any topic or create a topic of your own . We ask all our members to please read the terms and conditions . You can find these on the bottom right of the page . These rules are In place so we can keep Laura's a safe and warm place for all to share . Looking forward to getting to know you .

Angel

[Carolyn Marie]

Welcome to the Playground, Bobbi. Nope, I didn't fall asleep once while reading your post. In fact, I quite enjoyed it. Thank you for taking the time and trouble to let us know a little about you.

You will find a lot of folks who share your story, and a lot of vets, too. We have some of the best resources around, some great information, and without a doubt the most friendly and welcoming members of any site, anywhere. I know you'll find that out for yourself soon enough.

Post any question in any of the forums, and we'l do our best to answer you honestly. After five posts, you will have access to all of the site features, including the private message (PM) system.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest Prettypolly1389]

Hi Bobbi,

I really liked your introduction. You sound like a really caring person and I am really glad that you have your family around you. It is not easy and I really respect you for what you have shared with us.

[gennee]

Hi Bobbi and welcome to Laura's. I am a veteran (army) also. I have been out to my wife for over seven years. I am not going to transition because I don't feel the need to. Many of us have similar experiences. There are some great rsources here and no question is a dumb one. I loved reading your introduction.

[Guest miss kindheart]

Hi Bobbie,

<<< hug >>>

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.

The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.

Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.

One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules.

We have MTF meetings-Mon & Sat 9pm est, and you are welcome to attend.

We all look forward to seeing you.

vanna

[Guest BobbiLee]

Hi again all! Thanks for the warm welcome!! I am looking forward to learning a lot from you all and hope to support as much as I seem to be getting support (already). I have lots of questions and rally look forward to your input!!

Thanks again!!

Hugs,

Bobbi