Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Coming Out


Guest DianaTS1

Recommended Posts

Guest DianaTS1

Hi! I am Diana and I am new to the site. I have decided that I am no longer wanting to hide behind my man suit. I have told my wife and she is OK with it. I have contacted a gender therapist and will be counseling starting on Monday. I hope in 3 months or so I will be taking my first treatments. I have always felt and acted as a woman. At 5 years old I used to dress in woman's undies In my 20's I dressed in woman's clothes In my 30's and 40's I went all the way. Now I am looking forward to being the woman I have always been. Any tips I can get would be great. Please help. :lol:

Link to comment
Guest Kelly Ann

Hello Diana...well for gosh sakes make it warm...and in layers this time of year up yonder! Ah...age appropriate...at 56 a schoolgirl outfit just wouldn't look right...but I've got great legs so slightly above the knee is ok for me, a little jelly belly (it GOES as a New Years Resolution) so I tend to stay away from clingy stuff other than niteys. I'll usually be a 36b or c as it fits my stature (6' or so) with forms, I stay away from heels...not that I don't like them but my ankles are still good and I'd like to keep them that way...flats are my friends, the more subtle the make-up the better...if you can barely tell it's there...and have to look REAL close...I did it right. Buy only quality things that you HAVE to HAVE, Kelly Ann

Link to comment
Guest CamilaRose

Dianna,

Sounds like you're on the right track! Welcome to the community! Did anyone offer you hot cocoa yet? No? Well, this is a rare opportunity, let me be the first! Grab a big comfy chair and some cocoa (VIRTUAL, sorry :() and get ready. Hopefully before very long you'll be inundated with welcomes and offers of cocoa...:)

Hmmmm....suggestions....not sure what you'd need help with, you sound like you're pretty experienced ;)

Anyway, welcome, and feel free to pose any question you might have, the people here are EXTREMELY understanding and non-judgemental. We're all looking for support and a place to come where we can just be ourselves without fear of criticism or misunderstanding.

Cami

Link to comment

Hello there, Dianna,

I see that Camila has offered you a chair and some cocoa, would you like some mini mrshmallows or some cookies?

We are friendly and I'm 57 and just starting my transition so remember what Kelly Ann said about age appropriate - but a lot of us older gals have still got pretty nice legs - so a little bit of a shorter skirt - don't get carried away!

I like heels, but at 6'4" anything over a couple of inches makes me have to duck at doorways! I still like what they do for my legs and the lift that it gives the behind (we are G rated here).

Love ya,

Sally

Link to comment
Hi! I am Diana and I am new to the site. I have decided that I am no longer wanting to hide behind my man suit. I have told my wife and she is OK with it. I have contacted a gender therapist and will be counseling starting on Monday. I hope in 3 months or so I will be taking my first treatments. I have always felt and acted as a woman. At 5 years old I used to dress in woman's undies In my 20's I dressed in woman's clothes In my 30's and 40's I went all the way. Now I am looking forward to being the woman I have always been. Any tips I can get would be great. Please help. :lol:

Diana,

Sounds like we have the same type of background, and age. I finally decided after years of suppressing who I am to finally accept the facts. My therapist has also been extremely helpful in making me realize who I really am, and I am grateful to have found her. However, I haven't broken the news to my wife yet, for that is my biggest fear. If I may ask, how did you (or anyone else on this post) find the way to tell your wife-and what was the reaction? Hope this isn't too personal a question. Thanks in advance for the advice.

Love,

Gina G

Link to comment
Guest Courtney Hamilton

Welcome, and it sounds like my story too. Mine started in Nov of this year. You should find alot in common with the people here. Welcome again hope to see you around the boards.

Link to comment
Guest Donna Jean

Gina said:

Diana,

Sounds like we have the same type of background, and age. I finally decided after years of suppressing who I am to finally accept the facts. My therapist has also been extremely helpful in making me realize who I really am, and I am grateful to have found her. However, I haven't broken the news to my wife yet, for that is my biggest fear. If I may ask, how did you (or anyone else on this post) find the way to tell your wife-and what was the reaction? Hope this isn't too personal a question. Thanks in advance for the advice.

Well, sweetie...It was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life....I'm a Viet Nam veteran...that sucked...I have done hard things in my life, but, telling her was the HARDEST thing I've ever done. I was fully prepared to lose her..didn't want to..but, I just could not live with it anymore.

Revelation!!! She totally accepted me..!!!! These last months have been the happiest that I can remember. There is no formula for this..you roll the dice and you take your chances. Some lose all...some gain all. I've gained everything. I wish that I could tell you 1.-2.-3. do this and do that. It doesn't work like that. If you have a strong bond it can work. It will never be easy...

My wife and I will end up a couple weird old ladies growing flowers and I couldn't be happier.

If you are like me you will waste too much time being afraid and that only takes time off of the other end of your life where happiness counts. If it was meant to be..it will.

It is scary. I cried all day when I told her. But, she took me in her arms and soothed me.

I'm so sorry..if you want to be happy you must come out eventually..good or bad result..you need to move forward. You may wait a week or a month or years...if you want to be happy you must do it. Don't be the idiot that I was..your happiness is paramont.

Gina said:

However, I haven't broken the news to my wife yet, for that is my biggest fear. If I may ask, how did you (or anyone else on this post) find the way to tell your wife-and what was the reaction? Hope this isn't too personal a question. Thanks in advance for the advice.

No, sweetie, it's not too personal of a question. It's something everyone of us must do, sooner or later. But, take it from the voice of experience..sooner the better.

Gina, hope you take this as I meant it...just my view.

What ever you do...may the gods smile on you...

XXOO

Donna jean

Link to comment

Ginag Donna Jean is spot on. Broke the news to my wife just about a month ago. It took determination. When I told her I was a C.D. she laughed and thought I was kidding her.

My exact words to her "Would you think less of me if I dressed in women's clothes?" That's when she laughed. Ihad to repeat it four or five times, before she realized I wasn't kidding. Angry and upset at first, you betcha, but by day#3 we ahd an open discusion and ended the conversation, with her now fammous comment. "Well honey you could use a bra, with that late age weight gain"...LOL Do It Ginag Don't wait especially if it is driving you crazy............ Mia.

Link to comment
Guest CamilaRose
. If I may ask, how did you (or anyone else on this post) find the way to tell your wife-and what was the reaction? Hope this isn't too personal a question. Thanks in advance for the advice.

Gina G,

I don't know if it helps, but I'll tell my short story. My wife's brother said he was dressing up as a woman for halloween. and I said "Hey, if he does it so will I..." When I did, my wife did my makeup and I could finally, after all these years, see the woman inside. I mean really see her, not just feel it. I was so overwhelmed with gratitude that I slipped and said, "Honey, I might like to do this again...and then the whole story just poured out of me. I told her about my childhood, about my parents' rejection of my femininity, how I buried it, etc. Honestly, it was as much of a surprise to me to finally confess it all as it was for her to hear it. Do you know what she said, as I was sitting there trembling and wondering WHY I'd just screwed up a perfect relationship by bringing THAT up? She said, I love you no matter what! I was floored! This is not to say that our relationship is perfect, but she's accepted this side of me, and is doing her utmost to be understanding. What's more, she told her mother, and her mother picked my name! She said, "I love her, and if it makes her happy, great!"

The moral? I don't know your SO, but so far as I have seen, those that TRULY love you can REALLY surprise you. :D

Now, I haven't told my parents yet, but I suspect that if or when I do, they might not be so accepting (they're ultra-conservative), but who knows? They may have changed since I was 14...it's been a few years...like Dr. Seuss says:

"Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind"

Hugs,

Cami

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   1 Member, 0 Anonymous, 122 Guests (See full list)

    • MomTGDaughter
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.4k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,026
    • Most Online
      8,356

    JamesyGreen
    Newest Member
    JamesyGreen
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Anyatimenow
      Anyatimenow
      (23 years old)
    2. Aria00
      Aria00
    3. Ava B.
      Ava B.
      (24 years old)
    4. Claire Heshi
      Claire Heshi
    5. CrystalMatthews0426
      CrystalMatthews0426
      (41 years old)
  • Posts

    • Maddee
    • Birdie
      That does get you the 'starting point' for cup size, but manufacturers, style, breast shape, etc... will effect the results.    Step one is of course finding the proper band fit, then figuring out the approximate cup size with the calculations. Of course you need to try on a few styles after that in different cup sizes close to your measured result until you get the perfect fit.    I have bras in a DD that fit just like my bras in DDD both from Torrid but different styles.    I have some DDD's that fit awesome and some that are a bit loose, but I measure a 46G. It's not wonder that 80% of women are wearing them wrong bra. 
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.nbcmiami.com/news/local/man-arrested-accused-of-beating-to-death-transgender-woman-outside-miami-city-ballet/3293404/     May Andrea rest in peace.  If the person in custody is found guilty, hopefully he'll get the punishment he deserves.   Carolyn Marie
    • violet r
      I firmly believe I drank entirely to much for about 25 years. Got drunk every day. This was my coping mechanism to keep hiding deep inside that I was a woman. I miss a lot of signs over the years. Now I drink mabye 1 or 2 beers a day don't even get a buzz anymore. totally accept myself and on regret is that I hide that part of my self which  truly makes me happy being violet 💜. I wasted a lot of time before  being self destructive and had no clue I was just hiding th real me
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Service manager at goes through that here.One was a belt change in a 2019 Kenworth.It was written on the work order including a service done and I seen it.Customer was a complete a-hole.I did it and said he did not want that done.Shown him the original work order and finally said the service manager was right.My boss had to get rid of two customers,always complained about their bill being a little high.Price of parts went up due to inflation and had to explain this to them
    • Tiffany 838
      Well it not morning and I haven’t been on her for a while but it’s nice to be back.  Did some catching up on everyone.  I do have a question, how is Toronto Canada for a get away? Is it a safe and friendly area for us to go.  The wife and I are looking for some where to go to allow me to be my true self.     thanks in advance
    • KymmieL
      Hey, everyone. my life is going down the tubes. at least I think. So, today. A customer called about his car, I told him that the oil change was done. The parts to fix the check engine light are ordered. He can come and get it. For the weekend if he wants. Customer says I didn't want an oil change. it was check the engine light and check for an oil leak. Checking the work order says oil change. The boss wrote the vehicle up. checking with the customer on services wanted.   Being that I wrote down the appointment in the book. and clearly states oil leak. She is complaining because she can't read my small ish writing. It seems she read oil and assumed it as an oil change. It seems like she is blaming me.  She wound up going home because she was too upset. She is stressing about an eye problem she has, she has to get eye surgery it seems she has a tear in her eye.    I feel that I am short for this job. because of the BS they are blaming me on. Plus I am still upset about the trust issue. If either one of the bosses start their Shite tomorrow. I am walking out.    
    • Davie
    • Abigail Genevieve
      "I love you so much,"  Lois said.  They met in the driveway. "I could not live without you." "Neither could I." "What are we going to do?" "Find another counselor?" "No. I think we need to solve this ourselves." "Do you think we can?" "I don't know.  But what I know is that I don't want to go through that again.  I think we have to hope we can find a solution." "Otherwise, despair." "Yeah.   Truce?" "Okay,  truce." And they hugged.   "When we know what we want we can figure out how to get there."   That began six years of angry battles, with Odie insisted he could dress as he pleased and Lois insisting it did not please her at all.  He told her she was not going to control him and she replied that she still had rights as a wife to a husband. Neither was willing to give in, neither was willing to quit, and their heated arguments ended in hugs and more.   They went to a Crossdressers' Club, where they hoped to meet other couples with the same problems, the same conflicts, and the same answers, if anyone had any.  It took them four tries before they settled on a group that they were both willing to participate in.  This was four couples their own age, each with a cross dressing husband and a wife who was dealing with it.  They met monthly.  It was led by a 'mediator' who wanted people to express how they felt about the situation.  Odie and Lois, as newcomers, got the floor, and the meeting was finally dismissed at 1:30 in the morning - it was supposed to be over at 10 - and everyone knew how they felt about the situation.   There was silence in the car on the way home.   "We aren't the only ones dealing with this." Odie finally said.   "Who would have thought that?  You are right."   "Somebody out there has a solution." "I hope you are right."   "I hope in hope, not in despair."   "That's my Odie."    
    • Abigail Genevieve
      The counseling session was heated, if you could call it a counseling session.  Sometimes Lois felt he was on Odie's side, and sometimes on hers.  When he was on her side, Odie got defensive. She found herself being defensive when it seemed they were ganging up on each other.   "This is not working," Lois said angrily, and walked out.  "Never again. I want my husband back. Dr. Smith you are complicit in this."   "What?" said Odie.   The counselor looked at him.  "You will have to learn some listening skills."   "That is it? Listening skills?  You just destroyed my marriage, and you told me I need to learn listening skills?"   Dr. Smith said calmly,"I think you both need to cool off."   Odie looked at him and walked out, saying "And you call yourself a counselor."   "Wait a minute."   "No."
    • Ashley0616
      Just a comfortable gray sweater dress and some sneakers. Nothing special today. 
    • VickySGV
      I do still carry a Swiss Army knife along with my car keys.  
    • Timi
      Jeans and a white sweater. And cute white sneakers. Delivering balloons to a bunch of restaurants supporting our LGBT Community Center fundraiser today!
    • April Marie
      Congratulations to you!!!This is so wonderful!!
    • missyjo
      I've no desire to present androgynous..nothing wrong with it but I am a girl n wish to present as a girl. shrugs, if androgynous works fir others good. always happy someone finds a solution or happiness    today black jeans  black wedges..purple camisole under white n black polka dot blouse half open   soft smile to all 
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...