A good day out!

[Guest Nikki P]

So yeseterday I had my 4th appt with my GT. We started working on the HRT letter which she has never done before the sixth session before but she's making an exception for me. So I will have it by next session. She took a template from someone elses letter to start creating mine, and that one had something in it about using the restroom. So she asked me what I do, and I told her when I'm out en femme I use the womens restroom, and no one has seemed to notice yet. And she was like "of course not, you totally pass, you haven't even lost your baby face yet!". I kinda laughed, but I am lucky that I pretty much still have the face I had when I was 14. So that was nice to hear.

After the session endedmy roommate and I went around town shopping, and I was en femme. Instead of all my room mates being with me like usual when I go to my GT, it was just one of my female room mates. As we were going around there were several instances where store clerks or things like that would say "hey ladies". And that made me feel good every time. And they would continue to use ladies to refer to us even after I opened my mouth, which gave me some confidence in my voice. I tried to avoid spending money, but I still ended up with a new belt, and almost got a skirt, but I couldn't find a top I liked to go with it. XD

Then we went out to lunch, where the waiter referred to us as ladies every time, and afterwards I used the womens restroom without any problems.

I kept looking into the full body mirros in the mall as we walked by them, and I felt like I looked better everytime I saw myself again. It was just a generally confidence boosting day!

I did wander into my grandpas hallmark store to see if he was there while I was in the mall and he wasn't. But I told the lady who was working there that the manager was my grandpa. I'm wondering if she's going to relay a message that his granddaughter was in there looking for him. He knows about me, but he's never heard my female voice or seen my dressed in my girl clothes. Could be interesting... XD

<3

~ Nikki

[Guest SusanB]

Glad you had a great day

Hoping to pass one day and do the same

[Guest Julie_Mason]

Thats great!

Im glad things are moving along for you swimingly. Ive only had 1 session with my Therapist so far, but Ill be going to my second one tomorrow. I hope that she will be as forthcoming with my letter as yours is being.

Also glad to hear that you are going out enfem more frequently, Ive been doing that also. Infact, Ill be going to Atlanta Pride next weekend and spending all 3 days enfem (I cant wait!).

Its really nice when we get referred to as what we really are. I dont get many "bad" stares from people anymore (though I have been getting a few "good" ones, lol) when Im out enfem, and just like your experience with the mirrors, I think it has ALOT to do with confidence in ourselves (Im sure your nice soft features help too ). The voice thing is great to hear as well. Ive been experimenting with different timbres and pitches using a recorder on my phone, and have been answering phone calls at work using my fem voice, and usually get either a "maim" or no distinction at all (though the few times that Ive gotten a "sir", were quite unsettling).

Im also finding that when Im not enfem and people inevitably call me sir (in person) it bothers me more than it used to. But I know that visual perception is 99% of most people's reality, so I just shrug it off and keep dreaming of the (not-so-distant) day when I can go full time. I think that what really gets to me is that Ive stopped hiding myself behind a masculine facade, and I use my feminine voice and feminine manurisms even when Im in "boy-mode", but I still get referred to as "Sir".

"If a man is offered a fact which goes against his instincts, he will scrutinize it closely, and unless the evidence is overwhelming, he will refuse to believe it. If, on the other hand, he is offered something which affords a reason for acting in accordance to his instincts, he will accept it even on the slightest evidence..." -Bertrand Russell

Aaaanyway, Its really good to hear that things are going so well for you!

Take care, and keep in touch!

-Julie M. <3