Feeling down again.

[Guest Izzybell]

I've seem to have hit a low point again. I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm tired of being stuck living as male, I'm tired of being fat and I'm tired of not being able to be myself. And the more I try to talk about it, the more I just feel like I'm complaining, especially knowing that others have it much harder than I do. I'm filled with a mix of frustration, jealousy, anger, sadness and anxiousness, and yet I still seem to mascaraed as a blissfully happy person when around others. There's so much I want to express right now, but I don't want to come across as whining or ungrateful for all the support I've gotten already. (Seriously, I am beyond thankful for how kind everyone has been.) I'm just not sure what to do right now. I think I want to try to talk to more people around my age here, maybe just to help get a sense of what their experience has been transitioning at this age, but I seem to be too nervous to strike up any sort of conversation with anyone new. >.< I'm just feeling kind of detached and alone right now.

-Isabella

[Guest MsGsptlsnz]

Hey, don't feel bad about complaining. For now your the one who's down and needs to talk it out. Next month I might be down and You'll tell me something to brighten my day.

So here goes day brightener!

My son, he's eleven, is putting togather a skit. Zombie Jepoardy! The idea is you get three kids done up as zombies and one kid done up as Alex Trebeck. Alex then asks questions like "Also called gray matter". All the answers are "Braaaiiiinnnsssss" but the zombies will keep forgetting to phraze the answer in the form of a question and after a few of those they will then attack Alex and eat him.

Now that image has to get a smile on your face.

I know you feel fat and all icky male. I get that. My wife wont let me shave my arms and legs! Eeewww... I 've got hair all over me... yech! I just want to be smooth but she flips out. Thus is life. But keep in mind things can always change for the better. At some point you will be able to move on like you want and be the same on the outside as the inside. Focus on the future, not the past. There is nothing you can do about the past but learn from it.

There, that's all the fortune cookies I could find...

[Guest rikkicd64]

Isabella,please just hang in there,things will change. I also have been experiencing that "alone" emotion and have been depressed the past few days too.

Rikki...

[Guest Mia J]

Hello Isabella,

This is a safe place to come when you need to let it all out and ask for support. That is what we are here for, so don't think you can not express your feelings here when you are down. I think that too many of us do that (including me) and it does not do us any good.

I still go through periods that I feel stuck and thinking that I am not where I want to be. I can understand what you are saying. In retrospect the reality for me is when I look back and see just how far I have actually come.

Also do you have a plan set up of what steps you want to to take and about when you want to take them. Don't set the dates too strict as there will be times when we have to readjust. Keep that goal in mind and you will make it. Don't let the bumps on the road to your goals take you off the road.

Hugs

Mia

[gennee]

Isabella, taking the first can open up doors for you. We have all struggled at one time or another. However, that dark cloud doesn't last forever.

[Guest Addi]

Isabella, it's all part of the process. Just keep in mind that a lot of our isolation and loneliness is self-imposed.

You can get through it. Talking about how you feel is very important so let it flow. You will feel better and it's never a competition to see who has it worse. Everyone is on their own path and what bothers one person may not be the same as what bothers another.

Here's an Internet hug just for you.

Addi

[Guest Izzybell]

Thanks everyone. I'm trying to keep my head up, but I'm just finding it increasingly more difficult.

My son, he's eleven, is putting togather a skit. Zombie Jepoardy! The idea is you get three kids done up as zombies and one kid done up as Alex Trebeck. Alex then asks questions like "Also called gray matter". All the answers are "Braaaiiiinnnsssss" but the zombies will keep forgetting to phraze the answer in the form of a question and after a few of those they will then attack Alex and eat him.

lol. That is actually a pretty cool idea. hehe. And it did put a smile on my face.

Isabella, it's all part of the process. Just keep in mind that a lot of our isolation and loneliness is self-imposed.

*hugs* Thanks, amiga. I've never actually thought of it that way. I will definitely try to open up more. I just hate feeling like I'm being annoying. >.<

-Isabella

[Guest Izzybell]

Okay, I feel a little better now. I just came out to another friend, and she's really supportive, so I'm kind of riding that wave of happiness right now. hehe

-Isabella

[Guest MsGsptlsnz]

lol. That is actually a pretty cool idea. hehe. And it did put a smile on my face.

Anytime I need a smile I just talk with my son. He's always good for that.