Therapy For T

[Guest Gallium 67]

Is there a pre-determined set amount of time you have to be in therapy in order to be given the 'OK' for T?

And are there specific requirements you must meet in order to get it? (I mean very specific.)

I'm a FtM Androgyn (or hoping to become physically someday if I can get rid of my boobs and shape my body into something more male looking. For now I just have to settle for tomboy. Oh, and I want to lose the girly voice. I hate it.) so my situation is a little tricky as far as I can tell. Also, while it's true that I've wanted to be a male my entire life physically (well, at least since my earliest memories), there are some feminine qualities I'd like to still keep, or rather, some male qualities I don't want, such as facial hair and a crazy amount of body hair. Basically I want T but I want to stop at a certain point. Is this at all possible for people like me? Or am I screwed because I don't want to be 100% male?

Thought I'd ask here first before I decide to book a session with a gender therapist.

[Guest Mitchel]

Hey there,

As far as I am aware the choice to stop using T is entirely up to you. I don't think you have to be hulking with muscles and covered in body hair to be considered a man. You just need to reach a level of manliness that feels comfortable to you.

I'm in a similar boat to you. I don't want to be covered in body hair either, and while I want the muscles (desperately I might add) I am still rather partial to the slender male form.

I found http://www.youtube.com/user/MeikoElias to be a *huge* help. He covers everything from top surgery, androgeny and stopping T.

I hope that helps you a little bit.

[Guest Evan_J]

Laura actually keeps a copy of the Standards of Care around here. Thats the guideline a therapist will use to make a decision regarding referal for Testosterone AND all of the other components of transitioning. Keyword=guideline. That means "open to personal discretion".

http://www.lauras-playground.com/forums/in...hp?showforum=55

Now, as to the question of "what will be said when I say 'I only want to go part way' "? It might be like everything else, depend on the therapist.

[Guest StrandedOutThere]

I probably wouldn't talk about the "only wanting to go partway" stuff with my therapist. The only risk there is that if you aren't totally open, the therapist can't work through stuff with you. Definitely check out Meiko Elias' videos on YouTube. You might even want to email him and see how he played things with the therapist. Like others have said, therapists are likely going to vary a lot in how comfortable they are with writing a letter for someone who only wants to partially transition.

However, the sad truth is that, however far we've come, there is still a lot of "rigidity". I think a lot of therapists want to see you 100% "committed to the path" before they'll give you a letter. This is probably because of the risk of lawsuits. You know how it is. Everyone has to cover their own butt.

If you stay on T long enough to drop your voice you might not grow much facial hair. I think that would depend on your genetic predisposition to being hairy. People in my family are hairy. I've been on T for 2 months and already have some mustache hair. My voice has dropped some, but not a lot. Anyway, the whole "male shape" thing goes bye bye once you quit the T. Hormones help your body decide where to build muscle and how much there will be, as well as where fat gets stored. For example, right now I am watching my fat migrate into my belly.

[Guest Gallium 67]

Thanks guys.

Yea, I only got the idea of stopping part way when I saw Meiko's videos on youtube.

Maybe what I just need is that laser hair removal thing when it comes to facial hair. lol. (Because I don't want to lose the chisled male body look.)

Anyways, thanks again.

[Guest Evan_J]

Definately think about laser if you want the shape. But also think about other things affected by Testosterone should you decide you're gonna go for it. Will you mind if you lose some of your hair? You could depending on your family heredity. Will it bother you or your significant other if you smell differently? How about if you cause the bathroom to smell differently? (Cuz your urine smell will change too) And definately are you planning on a future with biiological children at all? Yes, many people have stopped Testosterone to have em but the truth is there is no conclusive evidence regarding how those children will turn out. The only thing they definately can tell you is that once those eggs are exopsed to a high amount of testosterone they are -in some way- "altered" from their original state forever. Think about it and be sure. Also there's the question of are you sexually attracted to males/anticipating sex with them just because the secretions normally made will tend to "dry up" once the ovaries start to shut down and could make it a "less than pleasant" enterprise without other artificial lubrication.

[Guest YaManShane]

You need to find an open-minded therapist who is fully aware of gender issues. Some therapist would deny a person hormones because they dont wanna go 100%. But there are some good therapist out there who will understand just gotta find them

[Guest StrandedOutThere]

Definately think about laser if you want the shape. But also think about other things affected by Testosterone should you decide you're gonna go for it. Will you mind if you lose some of your hair? You could depending on your family heredity. Will it bother you or your significant other if you smell differently? How about if you cause the bathroom to smell differently? (Cuz your urine smell will change too) And definately are you planning on a future with biiological children at all? Yes, many people have stopped Testosterone to have em but the truth is there is no conclusive evidence regarding how those children will turn out. The only thing they definately can tell you is that once those eggs are exopsed to a high amount of testosterone they are -in some way- "altered" from their original state forever. Think about it and be sure. Also there's the question of are you sexually attracted to males/anticipating sex with them just because the secretions normally made will tend to "dry up" once the ovaries start to shut down and could make it a "less than pleasant" enterprise without other artificial lubrication.

Evan makes some excellent points. The fun part about the urine smell is that, after a while, you don't notice it. ...only girls do. Muah hahahaa!!!

In all seriousness, T changes a lot of things. Some of the changes that are permanent happen very quickly, as in within a couple months. Make sure you read up on EVERYTHING that testosterone does.

[Guest Evan_J]

The fun part about the urine smell is that, after a while, you don't notice it. ...only girls do. Muah hahahaa!!!

And you're gonna love me. Kinda. I went to this support group tonight thats not my normal one. Its for peeps who don't want to fit the gender norms but are not exactly ftm or mtf. And your question -about not wanting to transition completely but be on Testosterone- was the subject. The person leading the group was a gender therapist Basically though, they said what we speculated, it will depend on the therapist. (This particular one believes in referring people who only want "certain features".) Also, she confirmed that there are physicians who will prescribe just for partial transition also. So really, its a matter or deciding whether or not T is right for you and then looking through therapists and/or physicians.

[Guest Jackson]

Evan's right. It really does depend on the therapist. The odd thing for me was that my therapist really didn't have a time schedule. She let me set the whole schedule. But I think that had much more to do with my age, my education, my past desire for transitioning, and my knowledge of the process.

[Guest Linus Thomas]

Evan's right. It really does depend on the therapist. The odd thing for me was that my therapist really didn't have a time schedule. She let me set the whole schedule. But I think that had much more to do with my age, my education, my past desire for transitioning, and my knowledge of the process.

That's very true. I had gone to my physician (a doctor at the Callen-Lorde Health Center here in NYC) who sent me for a 30 min interview with a LSW and then on my next visit started me on T. Within 2 months, that dosage got doubled to my present dosage. We still do regular blood checks and such but I have found it depends on the doctor/therapist as well as where you are age wise and mentally. I have friends in my support group that have been waiting 2 years. I have no doubts that there tends to be a lot more caution for those who are transitioning at a younger age (young adult) compared to someone like me, transitioning at middle age (late 30s).

[Guest lorddillon]

I agree with what everyone else here has said. And to elaborate:

1. It depends upon the therapist when you get to start - you may get a very good gender therapist that has their own personal time-line to which they like their patients to adhere (even if it's only two weeks, or a month, long enough for them to get to see you a few times and get to know you). It is also possible to get a good gender therapist that doesn't believe in gate-keeping and will write you a letter after 1 visit.

2. Make sure that you keep in mind, as you investigate the effects of T, that everyone's body is different and people respond at different rates and with different effects. I grew facial hair very very quickly (fast enough to have more in 6 months than one of my transguy friends has grown in two years on T). But I'm old (mid-late thirties), and I had a high T level (for a birth-female) even before I officially started T, so my body was ready for that. My point is that it will affect you differently, no matter what you read - some effects you want, some you don't - you may have to put up with some you don't in order to get to the ones you want.

3. Some of the changes caused by T are permanent, some are not. Learn about it and find out which ones will go away if you stop T.

4. Your transition is yours. You have the right to do however much T you want, get whatever results you want, and stop T whenever you want. Plain and simple. You may have to go by a medical/therapy time-line at first, but once the T is being provided, you are in control. Don't let anyone tell you that you can't transition part-way if that's what you want - if they tell you that, find a new doctor/therapist/friend/whoever.

[Guest Gallium 67]

Wow, great replies everyone. =O

I'm asexual and I've always thought if I wanted a kid I'd adopt. I've tried sex already and found it really isn't my thing. Tried flirting with guys and girls, but that didn't do much either. But y'never know. Could change with T.

I know that I want the deeper voice and more of a guyish face with broader shoulders (And I'd definitely love to lose the hips. >.<) and to have a flat chest (don't really need T for that but I think it helps?). I don't really have to be ultra muscular or anything like that. I've always been fond of that boyish look, if you know what I mean. (Probably because I'm not very tall. lol. I'm only 5'5. But I wish I were taller.)

Glad to hear I don't necessarily have to go to therapy for 6+ months just for T with some therapists. @_@ That's like a load off my shoulders (plus if I find the right therapist I can save some money this way).

And yea, it really is up to me in the end about how long I take it or not, isn't it? Haha.

Thanks again. You guys really helped me a lot!

[Guest jackg]

That's very true. I had gone to my physician (a doctor at the Callen-Lorde Health Center here in NYC) who sent me for a 30 min interview with a LSW and then on my next visit started me on T. Within 2 months, that dosage got doubled to my present dosage. We still do regular blood checks and such but I have found it depends on the doctor/therapist as well as where you are age wise and mentally. I have friends in my support group that have been waiting 2 years. I have no doubts that there tends to be a lot more caution for those who are transitioning at a younger age (young adult) compared to someone like me, transitioning at middle age (late 30s).

Late 30s is middle age? OMG I must be old...

Seriously, at 48 what are therapists gonna say?

And do I want a male or female therapist? I'd prefer a male as that's where I'm headed - comments?

[Guest CharlieRose]

And do I want a male or female therapist? I'd prefer a male as that's where I'm headed - comments?

I don't think it really matters. I had a female therapist and she was great.