Shy, Skittish... Hello?

[Guest Felicia Anne]

(hoping quickly out of the chair)

oh, sally! i... i wasn't sitting too long in your chair, was i? i just wanted it to be warm and toasty for you...

would you like me to get you some cocoa or a cookie? i made them myself!

[Guest Evan_J]

(**chuckling, grabs Zabrack by the back of the collar cuz he's startin to enjoy those "manly" hugs too much) "down boy" lol

Welcome Felicia. I can see you're getting to meet everybody. Glad you found us.

Is your AV you? I've been noticing great AVs that a lot of the gals have that are like "artistic" photos or whatnot. Nice one.

Definately don't be scared. You actually are safe (as safe as we can make it) and all of the rules actually are followed. We kid sometimes but thats all it is believe me. Even Zabrack is harmless (throws him a scoobytreat). Besides , Stuv is growling so no worries lol.

Just take your time here, you'll get comfortable quickly. Even if you have turtle moments ( and trust me, they'll lure you out) you are still included Glad to have you here.

Oh and before I forget, Elizabeth.....

a New York Second! (is time didfferent in New York?

Yes.

Last time I was there the ratio was something like 5 "everyplace" minutes =1 New York hour. Its how you can understand why taxi drivers get so "vocal" during traffic.

[Guest Felicia Anne]

hello evan...

i wish that my av was me... it is actually a redux of one of my favorite actresses.

i'm not that pretty, but i hope to be... someday...

(goes back to hiding in the corner)

[Sally]

(hoping quickly out of the chair)

oh, sally! i... i wasn't sitting too long in your chair, was i? i just wanted it to be warm and toasty for you...

would you like me to get you some cocoa or a cookie? i made them myself!

Wow, it has been so long since Donna Jean gave me that first cup of cocoa, and the cookies are great!

Thanks,

Sally

[Guest mia 1]

Some turtle..shy ....shy as any new yorker can be.i guess...................Another member of the welcoming committee puts in her five General Motors commom stock{2cents}

Sorry I'm late out all day enjoying the sunshins and 40mph winds. Lucky Mia.

Felicia I see you said that you were feeling confused and that was before you read Kelly Ann's welcome so what do you think now.

Enjoy your crazy old aunts and uncles........we're here for you.

What kind of music do you like and are you a reader, a movie goer etc.??? I lived in NYC a long time ago up in Morningside Heights..way back when Dylan and the Stones were young and all the Beatles werer still alive..etc.

[Guest April63]

I think this is the longest hello post in the history of the world. Wow. World record. Congratulations and welcome. You get a free fish. (Don't ask)

April

[Guest Felicia Anne]

hi mia... i think you have one of the prettiest names ever!

um, i am a reader and music lover, and it goes all over the spectrum... i am also a big time movie fan, especially the bad b movies... you know, the ones where the women all faint and get carried off by the monsters...

not that i ever wanted that to happen to me...

(embarassed beyond words, not believing i said that out loud)

[Guest Zabrak]

Woops, sorry about that.

MMM SCOOBY SNACKS

[Guest Magan]

Hiyas Felicia! *waves*

As you can tell you have found an amazing group, and you fit right in!

[Guest Felicia Anne]

i... fit... in?

i... i never thought that was possible...

[Guest Donna Jean]

i... fit... in?

i... i never thought that was possible...

See, Honey...

What did I tell ya....Wonderful people...lots of caring and love...You will have a hard time finding a better, safer place than right here!

Now, would you hand me one of those cookies, too? MMmmmmmmm

**HUGGS**

Donna Jean

[Guest Felicia Anne]

of course donna jean... i love cooking, but not as much as i love to share what i make...

does anyone else want some fresh baked chocolate chip cookies? i also have plenty of ice cold milk in the kitchen...

[Sally]

Hey,

I just popped in for a minute between errands and I must say you seem to have gotten over your shyness pretty well.

I'll have a cookie, just one won't effect my diet.

Well, maybe two, but then I really have to go.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Irielle]

Hi Felicia! I just found your hello thread and see you have made lots of friends already. Here is one more. I am shy, too, but this place helps me overcome that cuz everyone is so nice. Glad you are here.

Irielle

[Guest Felicia Anne]

(running around handing cookies and milk out to everyone who wants some)

thank you irielle... i like your name a lot! you sound like a princess!

and i really like it here, too! i am just overwhelmed by how friendly and supportive everyone is here. i have to admit... i have a long road ahead of me as i try and get my life and my heart to finally match up. there is a long road from the reality of my situation to living out my life as felicia anne

and the reason i go turtley at times is because when i think of everything that i need to do... and that can go wrong... and what must change... and the people who will turn against me... and how many details there are to being a woman... and how i freak out when i look in the mirror and i don't see a girl's face looking back at me... and how i am afraid of failing... and that i may never be pretty...

eeeeek!!!!!

(running and jumping behind the sofa to hide)

[Guest Irielle]

Felicia, thanks for the nice compliment about my name. My boyfriend teases me then calls me a princess and rolls his eyes at me

You are right, it is a long road for all of us. Just remember we all have our own path to follow but we never have to go it alone. I think you know that now from being here.

When I see a genetic girl often I just sigh to myself and think how lucky she is to be and look like who she knows she is without even trying. One day you will get there, too.

Irielle

[Guest Elizabeth K]

when i think of everything that i need to do... and that can go wrong... and what must change... and the people who will turn against me... and how many details there are to being a woman... and how i freak out when i look in the mirror and i don't see a girl's face looking back at me... and how i am afraid of failing... and that i may never be pretty...

eeeeek!!!!!

(running and jumping behind the sofa to hide)

WOW - I have the same thoughts!

You know what helps?

I once would watch a pretty girl or an attractive woman and think, "I can NEVER be like that, how can I every expect to be a woman?"

Then it hit me - yikes, I am ALREADY a woman, always have been, always will be. Its just this male body that needs some fine tunin'. GRIN

Also - wow like a seseme seed - on a roll.

I once worried about how many details there are in being feminine? Hey - guess what - you already know almost everything already - you just need to BE female and you will start acting female. I mean - be totally female in your mind, then you will start talking, walking, standing and sitting in a feminine way. Try too hard and you act like you are 'vamping." And the time tested advice here at Laura's - go to the mall - watch the women there. You are probably more female acting than half of them, but look and fine tune your female being.

Pretty? HRT will take care of that - or it won't - but you will be you 'naturally,' what you shoulda been like if you had truly been born female. Another classic here at Laura's - go to Walmart. Half the women there would not pass the standard for 'female' we TS judge ourselves by. HA! I told my wife that and she didn't believe - then she tested it out - said, 'wow, so many women look like men!'

And guess what - I started HRT - and NOW I see a woman looking back at me in the mirror. I know it's all in my imagination as I am really just begining, but ATTITUDE? Wow, Lizzy is gonna be a knockout in a little while - I surely do like her already.

People? If they liked your 'play-acting fake male' better than the new 'authentic girl' you? Heck with them - they really are blind and insensitive to the true you. Other friends will come in their place - good friends that will love you for you.

Darn - sounds sooooo goooood Lizzy - then why are you so terrified of what's coming? Fear of the unknown, baby - fear of the unknown... a human condition, transsexual or not.

WOW - hope this helps! I made ME feel better, at least - ha!

Lizzy

[Guest Felicia Anne]

i can't wait to get to that point... but i have a long way to go...

... i'm kind of uncomfortable talking about it...

...i know i have to do this, but...

...i'm not strong enough to become a woman now...

(hiding behind the sofa)

[Sally]

Felicia Anne, You come out from behind that sofa right now! Unless you are dusting, in which case carry on.

I'm serious about this, we all use a very incorrect phrase (of all of the things that people say that bug us, this seems to slide right by) "...i'm not strong enough to become a woman now..."

That is wrong 100%, it has nothing to do with strength or timing - you are a woman now.

The problem is that you are living as a male.

I believe that you are strong enough to begin the process of living as the woman you are.

We don't become women, we were born women - how can we convince someone else if we show that much doubt when we talk about it?

Sorry, I'm in sort of a lecture mode right now.

If you still have any cookies, I'd like one!

Maybe we could sit down - on the sofa, not behind it and discuss the trouble that you are having with your mirror.

The first step in passing is to teach yourself to see the woman in the mirror. We all tend to be overly critical of ourselves so we can't see our own potential. Look into that mirror, now bring your lips together, not too tightly, bring the corners up very slightly, close your eyes, think of a very feminine person, imagine that you are her now open your eyes and see the woman in the mirror. If you truly imagined yourself as awoman and believed that to be true, you saw a woman. I haven't had any HRT and I haven't seen my therapist since October but I still see a woman in my mirror - you can to.

Believe, be confident and be true to yourself.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Kelly Ann]

HHHmmmMMMmmm...dabb dabb...dee da dee dee dee...uhuuuUUUuuHH...ZZZzzrzrRRRRRzrrrrrZRRRRRrzrZZZRRrrrrr<stands back looking>That's the ticket Felicia Anne now you be a shining star*no hiding now and all it took was.......a little turtle wax grab your shades the world's...errr...YOUR sooo bright now you'll need 'em all the way to Timbucktu. Side benefit? Ya'll will swim and surf faster. The ever practically impracticle, Kelly Ann

[Guest Felicia Anne]

thank you, sally. thank you kelly ann...

self confidence is not one of my strong suits... and after years of negative reinforcement whenever i tried to express my feminine nature, i flinch very easily. i am very much the kitten that got swatted on the nose enough times to be good, quiet, and to never go where people didn't want her to go...

for a long time, if i remained quiet and never disturbed anything... or anyone... i would be left alone... and i wouldn't be verbally or emotionally (and in school, bullies added physical) hurt by people...

and sadly, even in my 30's, i am still a scared little girl in my heart...

i am trying to take steps and come out, and being here is a place where i can learn not to flinch... but it is going to take time to not be scared...

[Guest Kelly Ann]

arrrr it's pirate weeks here in Tampa...and there's some football game or such happening here...and I've been a real wench of late. So Felicia Anne as long as you feel free and welcome to drop in and say hi...don't think that anybody minds a bye...as long as there's another hi by and by because without that you'll be the cause of numerous sighs I occasionally get a trifle confused by these things and feel like I've been turning REAL FAST in circles giggling and just fall down...THATS my kind of fun sometimes, Kelly Ann

[Guest Drew]

hi Felicia Anne welcome to the forums. it's nice to have you here. you seem to be fitting in and getting over your shyness ....the ladies are right (and perhaps some gentlemen?) this really is a special place

so welcome, and make yourself right at home

[Guest Felicia Anne]

(looking at kelly ann like a deer in headlights...)

[Guest Jackson]

How is it that I'm always late on everything?

Welcome, Felicia Anne. I found another post of yours somewhere else and followed it here.

Don't worry. We don't bite. Really. Well, I don't. Some others might thought.