Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Layering, Makeup And Hairstyles; Oh My!


Guest Emily.SoCal

Recommended Posts

Guest Emily.SoCal

When it comes to making myself "look pretty" I really don't know what I'm doing. I dressed in private so infrequently up until the past few years that I might as well be a pre-pubescent girl when it comes to what I know about fashion and style. I desperately want to know how to layer and put outfits together, everything about makeup and how to get my hair soft and beautiful like so many girls I've seen here on the forums.

So I guess what I'm asking is, gah, where do I start? What websites, magazines, books, etc. would be good starting points and/or references for a little noob girl like me? I'm at the point where I have the confidence to walk into a store and buy the girly things I want, I just don't know what products do what or what's right for me and I'm so afraid of fumbling about in the store like some weirdo before I can even make a purchase.

Thanks for the input, girls. :)

Emily

Link to comment
Guest Elizabeth K

Yikes - good topic - slipping down though - don't know why.

Emily

Hey sweet - you ARE a pre-pubescent girl if you think about it. How do these young girls make do? They experiment. You will certainly need to stay age and style appropriate - but be prepared to blow some bucks on silly stuff that looks good in the store but looks ... well... stupid, in real life. Grin

I have my wife helping me. Do you have a sympathetic female to shop with? That's a key. Another thing is start super conservative like jeans with flats. Experiment with a blouse or two - or even a tailored shirt. Add some accessories - purse, scarf, jewelry, big belt - different things - until you FEEL right. Your dressing is a mixture of style and personal taste. Something in style may not be 'you' at all. Another surprising thing, you really can go much wilder with colors that you ever have in your life. There is NOTHING wrong with a pair of red shoes for example - so you can open up. And the cheap rule of thumb is to have basics that you can add or subtract from,..Sort of the classic black dress theory, but more like a skirt that can be worn with many outfits, a blouse that looks just as great on bare shoulders, as well as as with a blazer coat. Stuff like that.

And go to the mall when girls or women your age are out - get some tips. Remember what you see in the fashion magazines are faux - very trendy and maybe for people who aren't like you at all. Another trick is to look at women's clothing catalogs - they wanna sell stuff and seem to show things that are rather nice, but fashionable. I was surprised for example when I wanted a purse. I researched it on the internet and now can talk purses with any woman as I know what we as women are told to want! That's a little cynical but it works. And I wanted a denim skirt. Its not the season for denim skirts - I didn't know -a sales lady at Catherine's put me straight - and also called me sweetheart - they get a lot of CD and TS I guess.

And if you are now bold enough to shop directly, then look at what is available in the store - on the racks. Look up at the displays on the wall as well as on the mannequins. That's the cool stuff... The clothing closest to the aisle is the trendy stuff. Sales racks? Until you know what you are doing, stay with the quality items. You will also find that in the big department stores, the clothing MAY be divided by brand name.

Oh - very important, buy good, well made , high quality clothing. It shows - it helps you pass. My post op friend taught me that trick. Also - women judge women by their clothes. If a woman approves how you dress, she will sush her husband if he seems questioning of your gender. Ain't that strange!?

So looking around - like at a wedding, watch what the women wear - older, middle and younger. Women SHINE at weddings! Same at other events - parties for example. Also women out on a date are dressing DYNAMITE!

And stay casual at first. Hope this helps. Oh oh oh - look at the internet for quality stores - I found Chadwicks for example - with clothing I love.

Have fun as you learn - and EMILY! PUT DOWN THAT MINISKIRT, THIS INSTANT!

Lizzy

Link to comment
Guest Emily.SoCal

Heya, Lizzy :)

There was just so much excellent input in your post that I just had to go through and cover all the highlights. It got, eee, a bit long, but hopefully it will be of some extra help to the other gals here.

Hey sweet - you ARE a pre-pubescent girl if you think about it.

::blushes:: *sigh*, you know, I never thought about it that way, but it is true. I'm going through all the same things aren't I? Wow. Reality check.

...but be prepared to blow some bucks on silly stuff that looks good in the store but looks ... well... stupid, in real life. Grin

Oh, girl, don't I know it. Three words: Frederick's of Hollywood.

I have my wife helping me. Do you have a sympathetic female to shop with? That's a key. Another thing is start super conservative like jeans with flats.

Well, my now ex-girlfriend and I are remaining friends and have shopped in the past and have plans of shopping in the future. I guess I'm lucky that even though she couldn't have a relationship with me because of my transgenderism, she is still totally supportive of me being transgendered as a friend and individual.

She also got me started with jeans and flats which I think are a fantastic recommendation for starters. I feel prettier wearing nice jeans and cute shoes and so far no one has really noticed. I'm kind of a t-shirt and jeans girl, but I would like to wear skirts and dresses as the occasion permits. But I'm okay with jeans and tees for the moment and I would definitely recommend them to others as starters.

There is NOTHING wrong with a pair of red shoes for example - so you can open up.

I can't tell you how excited I am about COLOR! I've been very shy about it, but I'm going to be adventurous.

And the cheap rule of thumb is to have basics that you can add or subtract from,..Sort of the classic black dress theory, but more like a skirt that can be worn with many outfits, a blouse that looks just as great on bare shoulders, as well as as with a blazer coat. Stuff like that.

This was very helpful. I've sort of done it anyway, but not consciously. This is sensible planing -- have core components that you can make variations on with whatever you want to add.

Its not the season for denim skirts - I didn't know -a sales lady at Catherine's put me straight - and also called me sweetheart - they get a lot of CD and TS I guess.

I can't believe I didn't know about Catherine's until now. I've found quite a few odds and ends through Avenue and Lane Bryant and The Gap has been a lifesaver for tall stuff (camis, etc.) and Catherine's looks like a great addition to my fashion arsenal.

And if you are now bold enough to shop directly, then look at what is available in the store - on the racks. Look up at the displays on the wall as well as on the mannequins. That's the cool stuff... The clothing closest to the aisle is the trendy stuff. Sales racks? Until you know what you are doing, stay with the quality items. You will also find that in the big department stores, the clothing MAY be divided by brand name.

Oh - very important, buy good, well made , high quality clothing. It shows - it helps you pass. My post op friend taught me that trick. Also - women judge women by their clothes. If a woman approves how you dress, she will sush her husband if he seems questioning of your gender. Ain't that strange!?

This was some of the best advice yet. It's so tempting to go cheap with sale items when you're really unsure what's going to look good on you. But I've already gotten burned there a couple of times. I'll stick with the high quality clothing for now on. Especially if it'll help in some way to another woman shushing her husband over her gender -- that's my dream!

And stay casual at first. Hope this helps. Oh oh oh - look at the internet for quality stores - I found Chadwicks for example - with clothing I love.

Chadwicks -- another great recommendation. Between it and Catharine's I just killed an hour browsing while in the middle of writing this post. Heehee. :)

Have fun as you learn - and EMILY! PUT DOWN THAT MINISKIRT, THIS INSTANT!

But it's sooooo cute. Please please please! ...oh, okay. ::puts skirt back on rack:: For now. ;)

Thanks so much for your help, Lizzy. You're fantastic!

-Emily

Link to comment
Guest DeniseNM

Emily the advice that Liz gave is dead on (as always). Having a female friend to help you shop is one of the best things to have, also don't be afraid to ask the ladies that work there to help you out. I have found most are glad to and if they aren't then they don't need your business.

As to make-up the best advice I can give is find a store that has a make-up counter with professional make-up artists there and get their help in showing you how and what to apply that is best for your skin tone. If you have a Macy's near you see if they have a Mac counter there and go talk to the ladies there and ask them if they have worked with TG's before.

I was told about the Mac counter at the Macy's here where I live and I went in yesterday and had a blast and learned alot too. Spent about an hour there and will go back probably next Monday to learn about with eyes and lips. The biggest thing is they accepted me and were glad to help me out. So try to find a place like that for yourself.

Denise

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   4 Members, 0 Anonymous, 74 Guests (See full list)

    • SamC
    • kristinabee
    • MomTGDaughter
    • Kait
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.8k
    • Total Posts
      769.5k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,069
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Kait
    Newest Member
    Kait
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Caridad
      Caridad
    2. Certbunnie
      Certbunnie
      (25 years old)
    3. EstherElle
      EstherElle
      (43 years old)
    4. Juliet
      Juliet
      (43 years old)
    5. MelissaAndProudOfIt
      MelissaAndProudOfIt
      (59 years old)
  • Posts

    • Birdie
      Biopsies came back mostly clear except one, one polyp came back with abnormal cell growth (pre-cancerous). It was completely removed during the colonoscopy so I don't know yet if further action needs to be taken. 
    • Kait
      Hey-o. My name's Kait. I haven't decided what to do about my last name yet. (Mononyms sound cool, but they're very problematic unfortunately).   I guess pronouns are important. They/them or it/its (strong preference for 'it/its').    Im not someone who's been active in the community for a long time, but I've known I was trans almost my whole life. It's just that financial, medical, and psychiatric struggles have kept it from the forefront of my priorities for 10 years or so. So basically during that entire time, I've been living as an AMAB, masculine-presenting person named kait. Which is not ideal, but I've been able to deal with it by dissociating from my body and viewing it as an appendage rather than as a 'self'.    Mostly I'm on here because I finally feel well enough mentally and physically to think about beginning HRT. Problem is, I really don't know where to start out what to do. I have an endocrinologist I see for an unrelated health issue, but honestly I don't have a very strong relationship with him. Is it best to start with my existing doctor? Or should I find an endocrinologist that specialises in this sub-field? What's the best available tech? Is 29 too late to be taken seriously about this by my doctor? I have no idea about these questions and so much more and I need help.   Side from trans stuff though, I'm the boringest person you'll probably ever know. I have a pretty rich inner life and a wonderful partner, but really all I do is work, sleep, and occasionally build tiny models.     
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      I agree that porn is a really bad thing.  Bad in general, but probably gives a misleading view of trans folks.  If you don't see trans folks out in the wild, but you see plenty of them online, that is going to give the impression that it is primarily sex-driven, and that trans folks are interested in sex with just about everybody all the time.  Similar to what people often assume about being bisexual.    I'm androgynous, so sometimes people look at me this way.  Especially if my husband and I are together (if they don't assume I'm his kid) people get that "judgy" look on their faces.  You can sort of read their minds.  I even heard on lady say something like, "Oh, that's just so wrong" when we came out of a shower at a truck stop.  I mean, I like sex and we have a great connection in that way, but its not "THE REASON" for our relationship. 
    • Justine76
      Thank you for sharing! This is very much where I am currently. Questioning my motivation's, wondering where this is going and do I have the fortitude to continue the journey?   I too like to dress in what would probably be eye catching in your typically suburb. Not in a revealing way but beyond casual. Not that I’ve presented in public yet. Trying to build the confidence to dress for the next trans pride event locally ;)
    • Maddee
    • Justine76
      Certainly considering this. I’ve seen some reports, albeit anecdotal, of laser treatments causing some mild skin damage; like mild pitting, etc. Any validity to this in anyone’s experience? 
    • VickySGV
      @FelixThePickleManI and at least 3 or 4 others here on the Forums are in recovery (a couple of us over 15 years) from drugs and alcohol. Any drug, legal or not so, including abused prescription drugs (me) is potentially addictive and you need some help and uplift to break that cycle.  At first you do feel better by using your substance of choice, I know I did, but the substance takes over our lives, because for us they are cunning, baffling and POWERFUL and too much for us to control.  It was during my recovery from my alcohol and drug abuse that I first fully and with a lot of fear, but a desire to be honest came out to a group that actually turned out to be wholly supportive both of my recovery and encouraging me to get into things that would forward me toward my Transition.  Let us help you feel better about yourself without the substance since without the substance you can actually meet the challenges you face to become the best self you can be.  The goal is to like yourself every day without the false gods that chemicals can become, because they want to destroy us not help us live. We deserve to be happy and able to work and live our lives. PM me if you need some one-on-one and do the same with the others who will respond to you here.  A choral group I am part of sang a song in a concert last week that tells us that we Trans are OK and great, it is the people in the village around us that are the real grief in our lives, but here you are in  a village on-line that will support you.  
    • Vidanjali
      I can only imagine what your early life experience was like. It's very weird when children's bodies are treated as property of their parents and not really their own. Certainly children don't have agency to make major life decisions. But parents operating covertly doesn't seem to be entirely sensible. I'm sure there was a lot of fear on the part of your parents, and perhaps/probably even coercion by medical professionals. But what is your relationship like with your parents now, if they are still living or in your life? 
    • Vidanjali
      Hello & welcome, @Ladypcnj. That's great you're involved in several online communities. Reaching out to connect with others is a gift for all involved. 
    • FelixThePickleMan
      My mom found a vape of mine and this is the third time. I hid it out in the garage but she found it because I looked suspicious and now shes mad at me again which makes sense but she told me not to bring it in the house so I figured the garage was okay. But I know I should just stop but its something that I enjoy doing. I do it with my buddies and I do it alone. The one she found was a different, typically I have weed but today I had nic, but still, I know I should quit. Not because it's bad for me but because its hurting the relationship that I barley have with my mother and that's tough but for some reason I want to have my cake a and eat it too, but that isn't possible. I finally understand that phrase now, well I already understood it but now I really understand because I'm living it. and with that my mom most likely will pull me out of the school that I'm at now because that's when I started, this year. I've always had an interest in weed the way I have an interest of anything else. To me it's no different than the other things I'm interested in but this just happens to be a drug. I know I should quit I know it's wrong and I know that I'm choosing to do it, because I like it and I think in order for me to stop is to not like it anymore otherwise I most likely will continue. I know its sad but unfortunately it is true I know I'll have to quit before I go in the Marines so maybe I'll stop then. I smoke because I don't have anything else to do initially but now I smoke because I don't have anything to do and I  like it. Even when I did basketball I still was high, and I still played in fact I played better. I do everything better when I'm high I'm like a better version of myself, I can let go and let the me on the inside show on the outside with no fear, my creativity flows like Niagara falls just a contunious stream of creative output and innovative ideas that leave a good impression on others. I'm better to be around when high. I like myself better when I'm high.
    • Adrianna Danielle
      This neighbor's friend,luckily my health insurance covered it.Luckily my vehicles,house and shop are smoke free.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      @VickySGV    Good point.  There are websites full of porn and fantasies related to cross dressing, trans stories, etc., and people might easily think those are written by TG types and accurately describe TG folk.
    • VickySGV
      No one has mentioned the Adult Entertainment Industry aka the Pornography Industry which for too long was the ONLY source of information about us for the general public.  I actually realized what I was from an XX Rated publication that I snuck behind a comic book at the neighborhood convenience / liquor store.  The person in the article told of her feelings up until and through GCS which I identified with completely, but then went on to the sob story of a marriage crashing when her knowing husband went to a new job and they found out she was Trans on a security check and threatened the husband with legal action unless he divorced her ---  yada yada!!   On that note she decided her  life was ruined. --    Other problems in the Porn Press are of course the "Morality" and it is there that child endangerment stories for actual mental illness types  comes in.  Also in that media they emphasize the Fetishistic Cross Dresser classification which is an actual addiction situation and is a harmful process addiction of sex that is as terrible as Drug and Alcohol Addiction can be.  The pornographic issues and sources of information are readily available in the opening pages of a Google Search while actual Trans information is about page 200 on the engine.   A recent misadventure I had that shows how acceptable I am as my True Self is that a man who claimed to be a church elder (minister??) told me how he had never come up with legitimate information   on Trans People and actual Trans Children and he went on to brag about what he did find that was morally damning by looking for the  information.  He continued to go into detail about other pornographic sources and how nasty they were. I asked him then why HE, a MINISTER kept looking at the Porn.  He replied to me that he kept up with it to warn his congregation of the true evils he had seen so he could minister to them.  Happily for me a friend of mine came along so I could  break away from the guy who was after my soul.  (He did not read me as Trans, whew!!)
    • Ashley0616
      Just like anything else that is new it's always the thing that people fear of. People are typically afraid of change. Even something as simple as new procedure at work or the population growing. Typically just have the mindset of it's not broken then don't fix it type of attitude. The world is progressing and they need to accept that or they will eventually be left behind. A good example after WW II women working in the workforce things didn't go well at all due to a lot of butting heads. There are still even people now that think women are only meant for housework and raising babies. 
    • RaineOnYourParade
      I've actually seen a lot of people who at least tolerate the LGB and not the T. There's also some of the gay/lesbian population that, unfortunately, alienate trans people away from other parts of the community.   To me, the biggest block is probably the lack of formal exposure. If people aren't taught about LGBT they will, just like any other topic, come to misunderstandings and more. Besides, how can most LGBT people figure out that they are such if they don't know it exists? I know that, personally, I didn't realize I was a guy rather than just someone who wanted to be a guy until I was introduced to trans as a concept 
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...