low averages/GPA's sophomore year of high school?

[Guest ckoa97]

now it is the end of my sophomore year of high school and to me, my grades are terrible. freshman year (i was at a different school but i transferred due to bullying and personal issues) i managed to keep my average at about an 85 which is a 3.0 GPA. when i transferred schools, i noticed that test count as low as 45% of your overall grade in a subject to 60% of your overall grade in other subjects. my average for the first semester on my transcript was a 79. i calculate my average to be around a 70-75 for the final. now here is something weird and that i don't find fair: for the second semester, all grades from the second semester are averaged in for the 6th and final report card. it's cumulative and i don't find that fair for students who did much better for the 3rd marking period than the 4th and 5th marking periods. other schools don't do that for grades that go on your transcript and they also dont make tests AND quizzes worth that high of a percentage.

today was just horrible. i checked my grades and saw that most of them were in the 70's and two classes in the 60's. i still have tests to take which i refuse to take. that'll only just lower my grades further and i will possibly fail classes and have to go to summer school or take them over again next year. i left school in the middle of the day because i could not deal with trying my hardest and still failing tests and getting lower than 80's in my classes.

i'm 15 years old and FTM. i started hormones over 8 months ago. i've been depressed and suffering from anxiety. i talk to no one at my new school because i'm trans. my voice still sounds high and i bind. it is obvious that i have breasts and it is very uncomfortable. i have to bind my chest hours per day and keep to myself because of the years of mental and emotional damage that has built up over the years. i've been staying up late and barely eating. i was finding it hard to cry due to all the stress i've been going through until now. i distanced myself from my AFRICAN family because they overall would cause me more pain. i had a crush on a girl who was african and basically bible bashed me and lied to me about her being pregnant. i feel like i've learned nothing in my now 10 years of school except that people hate me for the way i am and that i'm taking classes that i'll never use in my life. i dont have a 90+ overall average so i can go to an ivy league school. i don't even have an average that is in the 80's to go to a 4 year university. i feel like just dropping out of school or getting a GED so i don't have to deal with this anymore. i have TOO much on my plate. i wish i had just been born male. i probably cant even get a job this summer or participate in any sports because i'm hopefully having top surgery this summer. i do NOT want to get stuck at a community college. i really want to go away to a 4 year college and start my life over again in a positive light. i want friends who love and accept me and all my family to support me and be there for me and love me. that hasnt been the case. i dont want my grades to be like this next year (junior year) and i dont want all this trouble. i dont know what to do. i'm freaking out about how i'm suppose to go to a good 4 year college, get a job, pay for my hormones, surgeries, gender marker changes, place to live, clothing, food, bills, and entertainment. i do not know what to do.

[Guest ~Brenda~]

Hi CK (can i call you CK?)

Let's take this one item at a time..OK?

Your grades indicate that you are distracted and are not concentrating on the material you need to learn.

Can your parents or sibling or a friend or a tutor help you study? Most teachers will gladly help a student if they ask the teacher for help to understand the material. I am sure that you will get the help you want to improve your grades.

Are you able to talk to someone professionally about being transgendered? It is possible that dealing with dysphoria is interfering with your concentration.

I think you do want to take those tests that you are avoiding. Not taking the tests will only exaserbate your grades and will be counter productive to your goals.

It is good to have some plans for the future, but don't get consumed by them. You have the power within yourself to make your Junior year turn out the way you want.

Stay focused on high school right now because that is where you are at this point. College will be resolved when it is time.

Do the best that you can in everything that you do and life will work out just fine.

Inch by inch your life's a sinch 

Love

Brenda

[Guest Alexquisite]

Unfortunately, theres nothing you can do about the grading system besides trying your hardest and studying your butt off to get higher grades. I understand though cause I'm a sophomore too and I could have done way better this year if I tried. Get a tutor for next year or something. As for taking those tests, you gotta do what you gotta do even if you don't want to. Its better to get a lower grade than to get a 0 for refusing to take them.

As for everything else, you just need to relax and take it one step at a time. First things first, if you want to get into a top school you have to get the grades, so focus on working really hard junior and senior year. Colleges wanna see that you're improving each year and not getting worse. You'll feel a lot better if you turn your focus to school cause everything else will just fall into place for your future. Your anxiety will ease if you distract your mind from the source of it. Thats easier said than done, but you have to find things about yourself that you love and embrace them. People won't be as succumbed to accept you until you accept yourself. What you need is just confidence and realization that it won't be this way forever. Trust me bud. You're 8 months on hormones and you still have a long way to go. Its gonna get better.

Also, you're 15 and about to have top surgery? Is that even possible in the U.S.?

[Guest washougal]

Hi,

School can suck but the basic reality is that everyone at your school has to deal with the same grading system. And take it from someone who has gone to university your school's grading system is not harsh. I am not trying to freak you out but grading policies in college vary from class to class but tests are weighted heavily, sometimes midterm and final account for 95% of your grade, yes there are other classes where the majority of the grade is project or written report grades but you those papers wont be easy.

The most important thing i can say is dont skip your tests.

Yes low grades dont look good on a transcipt when applying to college but what looks much worse is an incomplete or late semester withdrawel because you refused to take the final exams. Plus if you dont take the test you are garunteed to have to go to summer school, whereas if you take them you might not have to. Also remember as someone else mentioned above, colleges mainly look at your junior and senior year grades. they want to see either consistently high grades all four years or steady improvement of your grades during junior and senior year.

Right now what you need to do is focus on school. From your description of your situation the best thing you can do right now is to not think about college, grades, transition or your future past the end of the school year. If you have a safe place to live and enough food to eat then forget about everything else and focus on schoolwork.

I have gone through a similar situation and was suicidal at the time with severe disphoria and no hope of hormones, surgery or transition in the near future, i got myself out of it (and managed to not flunk out of school) by obsessing about my schoolwork, not about the grades, but about studying and learning. My life was my schoolwork and by the time i graduated i had gone from almost failing several classes to an overall 4 year GPA that resulted in my graduating with honors. Something you learn in college is that school is not about memorizing facts and figures it is about learning how to learn. Once you know how to learn and how to think critically then when placed in a new situation that you dotn have the needed knowledge of (say a new job in a field totally unrelated to an job training or college study) you will have the skills to be proactive and learn what you need to learn to do the job.

Lastly I will say DO NOT DROP OUT. Dropping out of high school is never the solution to a problem. Trust me i daily see the effects of dropping out of school (both really smart kids and troublemakers) and you dont want to drop out. A GED is not the same as a high school diploma and i will honestly say that if you choose to drop out you may find that getting your GED may not be as easy as you think. Dropping out of school is a trap you dont want to fall into. Please dont do it. Just calm down and try to refocus yourself and prioritize those things that really matter right now.

-washougal

[Guest Jay Smooth]

Unfortunately the only thing you can do is not be distracted and try your hardest, Look at it this way atleast you have started hormones and trust me dude ive delt with worse from family anf girls and im a year older than you be grateful, And again try your hardest.