Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Happy.


Guest amie

Recommended Posts

I’ve always known I had a thing for boys. Or at least, I’ve always known they did a little more for me than the girls did. As years went by, I felt myself more and more enchanted by some of their behaviors and began to feel I’d like to be on the receiving end of their dear affection.

Years ago I met a very sweet boy in a factory I worked at in Illinois. He was openly gay and made it clear to me he was interested but I couldn’t follow through with any physical dealio cause I didn’t wanna act on irrational thought, yu know?

As a result, and despite how good Brian treated me, I’m so grateful I waited till this past week to be with another male. I have met a very warm and wonderful person that makes me smile every time I think of him.

This is the first time I’ve had sex with someone in almost three years for 2 primary reasons. First, I’m in the wrong bod for the sex I desire. Second, sex with the girls is too tantalizing in that it just made me jealous of them. I guess there the same reason more or less, rilly?

Anywho, I’m a pretty simple person with it comes to this type of intimacy or that related, I think? I get off on holding hands and little kisses. In fact, my favorite part of the whole thing was when afterward I could lay my head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat while talkin’ to ‘eem.

It just felt more natural, all of it. There are some things I just can’t bring myself to do but among other things, I rilly enjoyed knowing I was providing for someone that way, and that someone was enjoying me so. This experience rilly served as yet another little confirmation of sorts and despite the fact I much rather would’ve been female for it all, it felt close enough in my heart to make me very happy.

I could go on for a good bit on my personal feelings on the matter, I guess? It rilly hurt when he left this morning. I’ve never felt so relaxed and comfortable around someone so very soon. Kinda scary, rilly. But nonetheless and come whatever may, I’m truly thankful to have met him and as well, thankful I chose to wait and allow further discovery for myself.

Has anyone else here ever felt this way, that maybe you wanted to be with someone of the same gender which is the opposite of your desired gender and chose to abstain early on cause you felt you didn’t wanna act on irrational thought?

Well, I waited for about twelve years to make certain about myself, and though it’s been rilly lonely, I feel better about the whole thing now. This is a very serious matter for me. The only time I’ve ever rushed to bed with anyone is when the whole thing felt like a forced fabrication of sorts, If that makes any sense to yu?

Tell me whatcha think if yu wanna. And thanks for reading such a long thread. I try to keep ‘em short, anyway.

Link to comment

Amie,

After all of this long wait, I hope that this is someone that you are going to be seeing rather than just last night. It sounds like he is very special to you and if you are as special to him this could be a wonderful Thing for you.

You didn't mention if he knows that you are trans, so if you don't want to tell me - that's OK, but I am curious as to how long of a relationship you are hoping for.

I'm the incurable romantic romantic that wants to see everyone happy.

Love ya,

Sally

Link to comment
Guest Irielle

Amie - I'm so happy you have found someone that's good for you and you feel happy being with.

You might be in the wrong body, but you can still have the sex you desire. This is PG-13 so let me just say that when I have sex with my boyfriend I am female, even though my body is male. I tell him that and he knows it. Most of making love is in your head, only a small part is actually the plumbing. It is an important part but by far not the only thing.

Maybe one day your body will fit your gender, I hope so. There are wonderful people here who are going on that journey and others who are already there and they have great insight for you.

Make sure you are honest with him and tell him you are a woman.

Pay attention to your heart. Be careful of listening too much to what is in your head.

I guess I'm like Sally, I want everyone to be happy. You and your new friend, too!

Irielle

Link to comment
Amie,

After all of this long wait, I hope that this is someone that you are going to be seeing rather than just last night. It sounds like he is very special to you and if you are as special to him this could be a wonderful Thing for you.

You didn't mention if he knows that you are trans, so if you don't want to tell me - that's OK, but I am curious as to how long of a relationship you are hoping for.

I'm the incurable romantic romantic that wants to see everyone happy.

Love ya,

Sally

Thanks, Sally. Yeah, I'm like the turbo-romantic myself, I guess? And yep, He knowz about me. It's a pretty comfy dealio. It looks promising. But overall, I'm just grateful for the experience and how I felt in my heart about it all. That's what life is, isn't it? Just a series of experiences? How well do you handle them? What do you derive from them in order to build yourself? How or why did you choose to put yourself in a position to experience the experience, etc. You get what I'm sayin.'

Link to comment
Guest Elizabeth K

Good for you :P

Remember to guard your heart. Even if he truly accepts you, remember it is a romance all the same just like between any other couple, and they are tricky if you are just starting out with this love thing. Don't let him break your heart, and treat him with respect also. These first loves can be WONDEFUL. :D

Lizzy

Link to comment
Guest Kelly Ann

aaaahhhh...and it isn't even spring yet. Glad you have found a little patch of happiness along the way Amie...it's a Kodak moment that can't be captured on film. Happy for you girl...keep us posted in a PG way PLEEeeeEAAaaaASSSSEEee LOL :blush: hope he's a 'keeper' for you...Kelly Ann

Link to comment
Thanks, Sally. Yeah, I'm like the turbo-romantic myself, I guess? And yep, He knowz about me. It's a pretty comfy dealio. It looks promising. But overall, I'm just grateful for the experience and how I felt in my heart about it all. That's what life is, isn't it? Just a series of experiences? How well do you handle them? What do you derive from them in order to build yourself? How or why did you choose to put yourself in a position to experience the experience, etc. You get what I'm sayin.'

I am so unbelievably happy for you.

As to knowing what you're saying, I think that it fits pretty well with the advice I like to give about enjoying the journey. That is what life is about - so enjoy it.

You do have to guard your heart, but don't shield it from all emotions. Sometimes a little pain is necessary and often unavoidable.

There is a country song that Garth Brooks recorded years ago that says,

"Our lives are better left to chance, I could have missed the pain, but I'd have missed the Dance."

Enjoy the dance, Amie.

Love ya,

Sally

Link to comment
Guest Felicia Anne

amie, to hear you talk of romance makes flowers spring from the earth, the sun to rise and the birds to sing a wonderful melody... le sigh...

(thanks for warming the hearts of all the true romantics here!)

Link to comment
Guest Little Sara
This is the first time I’ve had sex with someone in almost three years for 2 primary reasons. First, I’m in the wrong bod for the sex I desire. Second, sex with the girls is too tantalizing in that it just made me jealous of them. I guess there the same reason more or less, rilly?

Yeah I can understand your second point. This is probably why I see myself more with men. I haven't ever had sex though. Maybe someday... its not like I don't want to pre-op, it's that I find people who are kinda far from me (like Ireland).

Best of luck with your relationship.

Link to comment
Guest DeniseNM

Amie I am so happy for you that is great to hear. Love is a many splendid thing but just remember to take it slow and be honest with him and yourself and expect honesty back from him. He sounds like a very nice guy from what you said. You are a sweet lady and you deserve love in your life. Perfect time for it too since V-Day is just around the corner ;) .

Denise (happy for Amie's romance :D & and handing her some chocolates)

Link to comment
This is probably why I see myself more with men. I haven't ever had sex though. Maybe someday...

I want my first time to be something really special, so I am waiting until after my SRS. I've waited this long, I can manage another couple of decades! :D

Love ya,

Sally

Link to comment
Guest Little Sara
I want my first time to be something really special, so I am waiting until after my SRS. I've waited this long, I can manage another couple of decades! :D

Love ya,

Sally

My first time vaginally will definitely be something special, regardless of not being virgin in other ways at that time. My libido is rather low, but I adapt to my lover's mood. If he's sexually arroused, he can make me sexually arroused. This scares me a bit even, because I tend to react pretty strongly.

Link to comment
Guest Felicia Anne
I want my first time to be something really special, so I am waiting until after my SRS. I've waited this long, I can manage another couple of decades! :D

Love ya,

Sally

i am in the same boat, sally. i cannot wait until after i have surgery (pending) so i can be with a man the way a woman can be with a man (trying to be G-13 here). but considering how much i think about being with a cute & hunky sweet & yummy boyfriend, it makes me crazy some days.

Link to comment

Romance is always good when you're ready for it - and its even better when your S.O knows about how you feel. I think this was a good move for you after reading your story.

Congrats and stay safe. ;)

Link to comment
amie, to hear you talk of romance makes flowers spring from the earth, the sun to rise and the birds to sing a wonderful melody... le sigh...

(thanks for warming the hearts of all the true romantics here!)

Nice. Great stuff to feel it huh, Sweety...If only on rare occasion?

I'd never agree to give up the way I think and feel about some things for anything, no matter how great they claim it to be or how great it looks.

Link to comment
Nice. Great stuff to feel it huh, Sweety...If only on rare occasion?

Sweet, Sweet Amie,

You are just so up these days, I look at your avatar and just know that it is really a picture of you.

Happy, caring, loving and generous - wow, someone out there has found a terrific person and guess what - that terrific person is you!

Love ya,

Sally

Link to comment
Sweet, Sweet Amie,

You are just so up these days, I look at your avatar and just know that it is really a picture of you.

Happy, caring, loving and generous - wow, someone out there has found a terrific person and guess what - that terrific person is you!

Love ya,

Sally

Heehee! I only wish I were still that cute! Maybe with a few months of HRT we can get that back, huh? Ha!

Your great, Sally.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   4 Members, 0 Anonymous, 201 Guests (See full list)

    • April Marie
    • VickySGV
    • MaybeRob
    • Indio1375
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.7k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,033
    • Most Online
      8,356

    ArtavikenGenderflui
    Newest Member
    ArtavikenGenderflui
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. afraid of self
      afraid of self
    2. Chaidoesart
      Chaidoesart
      (14 years old)
    3. Faith57
      Faith57
    4. Joyce Ann
      Joyce Ann
      (70 years old)
    5. Kelly21121
      Kelly21121
      (56 years old)
  • Posts

    • VickySGV
      As we said in the 1960's "Wipe out"!!
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://beachgrit.com/2024/04/tolerance-on-the-ropes-as-transgender-surfer-refused-entry-into-womens-division-of-longboard-contest/     Same old same old.  How will the Cis-girl surfers feel about trans men participating in their events, I wonder?   Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2024/04/russian-poetry-competition-bans-transgender-applicants/     Everyone in Russia knows that Putin hates LGBT people, so every segment of society gets on board with the Leader's viewpoint, or they risk his wrath.  Sounds a lot like Florida, doesn't it?   Carolyn Marie
    • RaineOnYourParade
      happy trans birthday! I can't speak personally on the subject, but I hope hormones bring you the changes you're looking for <3 
    • MaeBe
      That’s super healthy, to see that something that becomes common has less effect on you and that you are able to decipher these feelings.   Sadly, this trend tends to only deaden good feelings as we tend not to let bad feelings attenuate the same way.   I have noticed less euphoria, but still feel the dysphorias that I have. Sometimes the good sneaks in and reminds me, but often time it’s just me seeing myself in the mirror and being comfortable about what I see when embracing my realized self. I may not get the same buzz I once did, but I don’t feel incongruous when looking at a more “drab” reflection.    Wishing you strength, you are amazing!
    • KayC
      Congratulations! and Happy Trans Birthday @LittleSam! That is such a BIG milestone.  I can still remember walking out of my clinic with my first HRT presciption.  I was on Cloud-9.  Wishing you all the best in the start of your new Journey!
    • missyjo
      maebe thank you I try to be. I thank God for blessings, try to share them, beg forgiveness for my shortcomings n vow to try to do better...2 priests have said no, God doesn't condemn you just for being trans...but apparently evangelicals do   I shall vtry dear thank you  
    • MaeBe
      Meet him at the being good to others part of Christianity. At the heart of it, there are excellent tenets of the faith. Those that condemn are judging, Jesus would have us be selfless; stone casting and all that. Are you a good person? Are you putting good into the world? If your gender is an issue for God, let God judge. In the mortal realm, let your actions be heard. 
    • missyjo
      and just fi sweeten it..I'm catholic n he hasn't been for years..he's evangelical..whatever that is
    • MaeBe
      Let’s stick to cite-able fact. Most of my posts have been directly in relation to LGBTQ+ rights as it pertains to P2025 and I have drawn direct links between people, their quotes, and their agenda. I have made reference to the cronyism that P2025 would entail as well, by gutting, not cutting, broad swathes of government and replacing it with “conservative warriors” (I can get you the direct quote, but rest assured it’s a quote). All this does is constantly force the cogs to be refitted, not their movement. To say that agencies have directly defied a President is a bit much, the EPA did what Trump told them to do at the direct harm to the environment, the department of agriculture did the same by enacting the administrations forced move to KC which decimated the USDA.      How about Betsy DeVoss for Education? Or Bannon for anything? What about the revolving Chief of Staff position that Trump couldn’t stay filled? Or the Postmaster General, who did much to make the USPS worse?   Let’s not mix politics with racism, sexism, or any other ism. Because Trump made mainly white, male, appointments—many of them not, arguably, people fit for service—or unwilling to commit to term. I can argue this because, again, he’s up for election and will do what he did before (and more of the same, his words).   Please delineate how the selected diversity appointments have negatively affected the US, other than being black, women, or queer? Representation matters and America benefits when its people are inspired and empowered.
    • missyjo
      ok ladies if I've asked this before I'm sorry please delete    ok so I have 2vsiblings..one is overly religious..n preachy n domineering..so he keeps trying to talk with me n I'd like to..but he always falls into this all knowing all wise domineering preachy thing tjaz tells me he's praying for christ to beat Satan for control of my soul..which is doomed to hell bc I'm transgender    I'd like to try to have a civil conversation n try to set him strait n gsin a cooperation n real conversation    any suggestions?
    • missyjo
      abigail darling what about extensions or a wig? be brave n hang in there  to thine own self be true  good luck
    • RaineOnYourParade
      When I first started figuring things out, I got a lot more euphoria. Every time a friend would use he/they pronouns for me, I'd get this bubbly feeling, and seeing myself look masculine made me really happy. Dysphoric state felt more normal, so I guess I noticed the pain it caused me less.   Now, it's more just that my pronouns and such things feel natural, and dysphoria is a lot stronger -- I know what's natural, so experiencing the opposite is more jarring than everything. The problem is, most of my natural experiences are from friends, and I rarely get properly gendered by strangers, much less by my family. I've found myself unable to bind in months due to aches, colds,, and not wanting to risk damage.    It partially makes me want to go back to the beginning of my journey, because at least then I got full euphoria. I'm pretty sure it'll be like this until I medically transition, or at the very least get top surgery (you know all those trans dudes online with tiny chests? Not me, unfortunately). It's a bit depressing, but at least I know that, eventually, there's a way out of this.
    • RaineOnYourParade
      Major mood, right here ^^^    I've listened to Lumineers to a long time (a major portion of it by osmosis via my mom), so that is almost painfully relatable
    • RaineOnYourParade
      As for getting a button-up/formal pants suit, you can try to talk to her more -- Cis women in tuxes have worn tuxes in recent years, after all, (for example, Zendaya) so it can still be a relatively safe topic. For jumpsuits, I'd recommend going with a simple one with a blazer, if you can -- this'll make it look overall more masculine. There's a lot of good brands, but going for one without a lot of extra glitz on it will make it look less feminine under a blazer. I don't know many specific brands though since I usually just get my stuff from chain stores, sorry :<   When it comes to your hair, if you can't cut it, you can look up tutorials on fluffing it up instead. If you can pull it off, it can look a lot shorter and more androgynous instead!
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...