What To Do?

[Guest leo]

so lets bring everyone up to date

both my parents know that i wanted to be a boy, in a really short period of time which didnt help

i asked if they would support me, and they said they wont support me,

ended up having a big argument, and i walked out for the night

next day i made out i was just gona live with the body i had etc, just to have a civil time while im living here (its not like i didnt try)

by the weekend it would have been 4 weeks since my mental health check, and it should of been sent to my GP by now, mind they did say 4-6 weeks!

when my GP receives the report i can be reffered to a gender clinic.

now this is where im stuck, as im living at home i cant even go full time or partly even part time as male, my work uniform is basically a nurses out fit (makes me sick) and i wont to be taken seriously if i get refered, so like i said before i want to wait till uni in september, but i dont know if i can endure that long now.

i had my first facial shave today to encourage hair growth, and iv started ordering male clothes for when i go uni so im all prepared, but its killing me living this double life so to speak and im not sure what to do

go full time now and have to deal with my parents and such?

still try and get refered in my position?

endure and wait till uni?

or go full time and get refered and deal with the raft from my parents?

[Guest Irielle]

Leo I'm sorry it's such a tough time for you right now.

I guess my advice would be to decide what is going to be in your best interest in the long run.

It's a cliche, but the time will pass quickly and September will be here before you know it. It doesn't make things any easier but it does give you a goal

We all want it right now, don't we. I'm the same and it's hard to pace myself sometimes.

It's important to stay safe, both physically and mentally. It might be safest to stay living with your parents for right now, especially if you don't have another safe place where you can stay.

Can you start wearing some of your guy's clothes, maybe underclothes or something? That way YOU could feel better but everyone else doesn't have to know. Some of the girls here like to wear ankle bracelets for the same reason. Maybe a man's watch or something?

Your gender therapist will be able to help you and give good advice for your situation.

We all know how miserable it can be, you are not alone. Good luck to you and let us know....Iri

[Guest Zabrak]

Hey, lil bro, theres not much any of us can do to help you pick which choice. You need to make a list of pros and cons(if not a real one then a quick one in your head) and figure out which path is better for you.

If I had to pick, myself, I'd most likely go with my parents for now till I'm able to stand on my own two feet. I.E Have a job, my own place or at lest be living away from them. I pretty much started to work on my transition when I got away from my family because then there was no road blocks to deal with and no extra stress that I didn't need. Although, I know how annoying that path may be, many have taken it and are just fine today. It might be easier to think logically then emotionally in problems that risk your safety and shelter you're currently in.

That's just me though - not saying my path is right for you.

[Guest Evan_J]

Definately gotta say "do whatever is safest; both physically and mentally." Is it safest to "play along" for a while because they really would put you out? Only you know whether or not they would. Is it safest not to cuz you'll emotionally scar yourself if you do? Only you know if thats more possible than them putting you out. Whichever is best for you "do" that. If its just about arguing and words , well the arguments and words will still be there you'll just live somewhere different and only have to hear them less often. Only you can tell which is the less evil cuz only you know them and only you are there. We'll listen though and side with you (unless you wanna jump off a mountain) whichever you choose.

[Guest Sergei]

I think you should start transitioning but very slowely until September. I knew a transwoman who was in a very similar situation to you living at home with her disaproving parents. The way she delt with it was just by adding liitle touches here and there. So small that her parents wouldn't really noice. So like Irielle mentioned you could just start by wearing a mans watch. A week later you could add a mans belt then a week later another little touch etc.... All the while you will feel better because you'll feel like you're actually getting somewhere (even if it's very very slowely) but without alarming your parents by turning up dressed completely differently. Before I transitioned I also used to dress completely in uni sex clothes. This allows people to see what they want to see, but you to know you're being a man.