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A new day has finally come!


Guest Raelene

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Hi. I'm Raelene and I have finally come to grips with something that has been a lifelong terror. Like most of the boogers in our lives, they sort of shrivel up to nothing when you drag them out of the darkness and into the light of reason.

I'm sure my story has been told soo many times that it gets old, but it's my story and and all brand new to me! I have spent a large portion of my life trying to put that genie back in the bottle and it always found a way to get out. It started out when I was around 6 or7 and Just kept going all my life. Now that I'm age sixty two, I couldn't fight it any longer. The genie won!! Woo Hoo! I have finally decided that I'm a woman and that is that. I'm tired of fighting .

Now, what to do? I've read everything I could find and I think the first step is to get my body ready for what is coming. I've been losing weight and exercising to strengthen my system. Now here is the scary(?) part; today is the first day in more than five years that I haven't taken a drink. Why, I don't know, but a guess would be my own way of trying to cope with denial. By the way, that is not a river in Africa!

I have tossed and turned this decision every way I could for the past while and it was not something lightly arrived at. I know it's going to be a long, hard road for me, but it is this or that other thing that we don't talk about. The other thing was coming, whether by drinking, motorcycle wreck, or whatever. Now I can breath a little easier without that on my trail.

This has gotten to be a ramble, so I will just say, Thank you for being here. I'm really pleased to find that I'm not alone.

Hugs

Rae

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Hello Rae and welcome to Laura's. We are happy to have you here on the forums.

It is your story and no matter how many times we have seen a similar story it is yours to tell and shout to the world.

There are many of us here like you that took a lifetime to let that genie finally be free. It just gets to a point that we have to live as our true selves.

At Laura's we are here to support and help each other.

If you have not done so yet, we do ask that all members read and understand the Terms And Conditions to see how we operate. You can get to them by clicking on the link at the bottom right of any page.

Looking forward to seeing more posts from you. Just explore around the forums and jump in at any time.

Mia

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Guest Angel Heart

Welcome, Rae! i'm happy for you that the genie has been let back out of the bottle :)

it really is an amazing, though long and sometimes tiring, journey to be yourself. but it is well worth it...

:) welcome to laura's!

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Guest DianeATL

Welcome - We are so glad you are here and yes your story is familiar to many of us so you will find lots of support. Congratulations on taking a couple of positive steps on your road to finding yourself and tossing away the crutches. Dig around and you will find a wealth of information and if you have questions, thoughts, or concerns, air them out and you will be heard.

Welcome

Diane

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Guest miss kindheart

Hi Raelene,
<<< hug >>>
Welcome to Laura's Playground.
Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.
The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.
Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.
One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules. :)
We have MTF meetings-Mon & Sat 9pm est, and you are welcome to attend.
We all look forward to seeing you.
:wub: vanna

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Hello Rae, and welcome to Laura's! Nice to have you aboard here. Please continue to post as you can, and the money you save on not buying alcohol can go towards clothes, accessories, and such.

Our stories have commonality, but each is unique, and we try to support each other as we can, and when we can.

Huggs,

Opal

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Guest Carla_Davis

Welcome Raelene,

I am glad that you found us.

There are many members here that did not Come-Out until their 50's and 60's. I Came Out in my 50's.

Congratulations on your first day without a drink and I hope that it continues..

In addition to the MTF OnLine Support Group Miss Kindheart mentioned, If you should need any Support from abusing alcohol this On-Line Support Group at Laura's Playground will help you.

Transgender AA and NA Online Substance Abuse Support Group. A meeting for alcohol abusers and drug users based on Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcitics Anonymous AA/NA Style. The group is run and Moderated by: Michelle Doe and VickySGV who are AA members. Meets every Sunday Night at 9 PM in the substance abuse chat room.

A second AA and NA meeting is held on Thursday nights starting at 5 PM Eastern and is Moderated by ChefChristina.

.

I am happy to hear that you can breath easier.

It may be a long road ahead of you, and some possible bumps, but it will be very rewarding.

Nothing is Happier than Being and Living your True Self in your True Gender.

Feel free to post messages.

Hugs,

Carla

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest marissa anastasia1

Welcome Raelene,

Thank you for sharing...we all have a commonality at our core...your post was sincere, interesting and certainly not rambling....that's why Laura's is so successful...because of folks like you....

Love,

Rissa

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Guest Elizabeth1974

The biggest thing I took from your post is you need a great big hug and a congratulations on day one of not taking a drink that in my opinion is huge. Next is welcome to Laura's the knowledge, support and love I have found on this site has been a tremendous help as I begin down this path I hope that you find it also.

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Hey Rae, like your story and I see a lot of those things in me. Even though I am only forty seven, giggle, I also started late. I hit my gender wall in my fifties. It was such a long time coming. As I evolved I discovered many new things about me. I got back in AA, because I can freely admit alcohol and drugs are an addition I have a part in too regardless of "him". It was also a way to meet a whole group of caring and accepting friends. I would not trade that for the whole booze isle at the grocery store, even if given to me for free. I do lately wonder it "he" was the drinker in my pair. Maybe it was to put up with me. Probably more to keep me buried inside. Who knows?

"He" was the promiscius one. I want trust and friendship before wanting to go "there". "He" was the crazy disengenuise manipulator, I'm the genuine peace keeper. Somehow we are both inside here, but his influence is so much gone. I think that is why I can love me today. As we travel our new journey we can find that real us, we have the option of leaving behind all those things about us we didn't like. Take the baby steps, enjoy the huge strides too and always take the time to stop and enjoy the flowers when it becomes overwhelming. You are going to find the coolest person on the planet soon. YOU!

Hug. JodyAnn

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  • Forum Moderator

Hi dear and welcome from another "drinker". It takes so much to confront ourselves. Hopefully Laura's can help with that. You might also want to join us for an addictions chat on Sundays at 9 eastern in the substance abuse rooms. If your drinking was like mine i couldn't quit without help. I went full time on my 64th birthday. I'm not the oldest girl here either so please don't think it is too late. My gender therapist said there is a whole term and syndrome for people who make our kind of change later in life.

Again welcome.

Hugs,

Charlie

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Thank you all for the warm and sincere welcome! I am still on the honeymoon and walking on air from freeing myself from the dungeon of unhappiness. I know there are miles ahead of me and much difficulty with my decision, but I have never been at more peace within. Once again, thank you. Rae

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Hi Raelene, regards from the Deep South, er south florida that is :)

Congratulations and welcome aboard.

Btw, if that no drinking thingy disappears with other good intentions gone bad, you are always welcome to stop by our chat session on sunday nights. I know when i used to quit drinking, I usually decided I had overreacted about 24-48 hours later, lol! Darn near killed myself trying to prove I could handle Life without help...

Anyway, seeya around :)

Michelle

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Guest Raelene

Michelle, quitting drinking was a small thing compared to quitting smoking!!! My gosh, that has been terrible! But, like anything else, when you have good enough reason, anything is possible. Making the decision to transition was the key to giving up on the things that would hinder my progress and it was ridiculously easy to quit alcohol. Getting my liver in a healthy condition is a must as well as giving up tobacco. I am losing weight as well( although that is not going too well trying to quit smoking) and even though I am in pretty good condition, I still need to lose the tummy.

Mostly, I am at peace with myself for the first time in forever! I think this plays a huge role in my ability to go forward and not look back. Thank you for the encouragement.

Hugs<> <>

Rae

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Raelene, I understand about the cigs... I know dozens of people who have quit drugs and alcohol but can't put down the cigarettes. Very tough habit for sure.

You sound like a girl with a mission and a lot of good energy working well in your life.

Hugs

Michelle

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