hi

[Guest Sang]

i have no idea what to say aside from hi
im 38 and i told my wife who i really am i guess she only really believed me this time although this is the third time i have told her (about 2 weeks ago) and she hasn't completely blown me off yet we have three wonderful children and i am currently the stay at home parent otherwise unemployed there are many things going on not quite ready to share them all yet im only starting out on this long road

i have already read the T&C for the forums and many other things here.

[Carolyn Marie]

Welcome to the Playground, Sang. It's very nice to meet you. I hope things go well with your wife, although I'm sure you know that its rarely a sure thing. But many of us here, myself included, have kept our marriages and families intact, and so it certainly can work, with enough love, open mindedness and communication involved.

Please post in any forum, and thank you for reading the T & C's. After five posts, you will gain access to all of the site features, including the Private Message (PM) system.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest angels wings]

hello Sang welcome to Laura's enjoy hte warmth there is lots to read and great people to meet.I am an S/O if you think it is suitable your wife could join us here .We have alot of support for S/Os and would love to have her join us if she feels comfortable.

wishing you all the best as you begin your journey.

Angel

[Guest Opal]

Hello Sang and welcome to Laura's! Nice to have you post an intro and to say 'hi'. Please feel free to post more when you get to know us better and you are comfortable in doing so.

Huggs,

Opal

[Guest Sang]

thank you for the welcome

im not one to talk much and never have been but here goes for another slice of a life that was mine

i have been shy/bashful/guarded my entire life never had many people i would call friends and generally stayed away form people as much as i could. i have always been interested in video games always wanted to become a game programmer but with no money i had to figure tons of stuff out on my own and thats what i did while keeping to myself most of my life. i had always wanted to have a family so i got married to a wonderful woman and we had 3 children together. yeah the kids were my idea (the only problem was i wanted to be the one carrying them and giving birth). my son the youngest we knew was going to need lots of surgery before he was born. now 10 years later you wouldn't be able to tell he has had 12 surgeries and is still currently disabled. i do think my wife will stay with me but it is gonna take a lot of time and everytime i look at our son i am reminded of how patient she really can be.

i would like to find a GT in my area that i could talk with face to face but i haven't had any luck at all yet any and all help would be very welcome

[Guest]

Welcome to LP Sang.

Thank you for your introduction.

I wish you peace and prosperity on your journey and your wife's and family's support.

Huggs,

Joann

[Guest Truant_Luce]

Welcome to the forums Sang. All I can really say, is just go a step at a time. I think the hardest is behind you, considering you told your wife. It'll work out in the end.

Just one step at a time, if it's anything I've learned. Going too fast isn't beneficial.

But, welcome to Laura's Playground! Where the slides are fun, the swings get high, and... I'll leave that there. But yes, welcome! Nothing to hide. Just be you. *hugs*

[Guest Sang]

thanks for that

[Guest miss kindheart]

Hi Sang,
<<< hug >>>
Welcome to Laura's Playground.
Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.
The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.
Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.
One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules.
We all look forward to seeing you.
vanna

[gennee]

Hi Sang and welcome to Laura's. Thank you for sharing your story. I came out to my wife eight years ago and we

are still together. It took awhile after the shock wore off. We do many things together and go places. I'm out to

my faith community who accept me with open arms.

[Guest Sang]

i have asked her to read the info that is available around here but she is always so busy with work and college she hardly has anytime for much else.

and im curious if there is some page in LP that will help her to understand more specifically what is going on i should be able to get her here long enough to read it

thank you for another positive outcome

[Guest Carla_Davis]

Hi Sang,

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

You stated that you were interested in finding a Gender Therapist in Maine.

Here is the list posted on the Laura's Playground Website

Maine

Maine Gender Resource and Support Service
c/o Jean Churchill
P.O. Box 1894
Bangor, ME. 04402-1894
Volunteer organization working to provide information, referrals, and support to Maine's transgendered community, and education about gender dysphoria to the public. NOT a support group.

Outreach Institute of Gender Studies
126 Western Ave., Ste. 246
Augusta, ME 04330
Ariadne Kane, Director
Conferences and workshops on gender issues, Gender Attitude Reassessment Program (GARP) for health care professionals, clinical supervision for sex educators and counselors, Fantasia Fair, speakers' bureau for meetings and conferences, seminars for couples.
Phone : (207) 621-0858
Publishes: Journal of Gender Studies, information packets, publications, annotated catalogue

If they are not close to you, I am sure they can refer you to a GT that is.

You may also want to look into this Transgender Support Group as listed on the LP website

MaineTransNet
640 Brighton Ave (West entrance, top floor)
Portland, ME.
We are MaineTransNet (Maine Transgender Network, Inc.), a nonprofit organization dedicated to raising awareness about trans issues and providing support, referrals, and consultation to the trans community and interested others. Though we are based in Maine, our website includes information about a wide variety of transgender-related issues that may be of interest to trans individuals, family members, significant others, and health professionals, regardless of location. We have recently added a free 70- minute video available for download revealing the perspectives of a diverse group of gender-variant individuals and providing information for mental health professionals. We are planning several new groups and events in the upcoming months. Please contact Alex President of MaineTransNet for more info.
Partners Group Starting!
MaineTransNet is starting a peer support group for partners of trans-identified / genderqueer / etc. individuals. The first meeting will be Wednesday, May 13, 2009 at 7pm at the MaineTransNet office. Email Ali for more information.
Trans-Identified Support Group
The first meeting of the peer support group for any person who is trans-identified, genderqueer, or questioning was a huge success! If you are interested in attending, pleaseEmail Alex for for more information and directions. If you cannot attend this meeting but are interested in being part of the group, or similar groups sometime in the future, please also letAlex know.

Look at the area I highlighted in Red.

They also have information about mental health professionals.

Finally, you may wish to look at COLAGE, http://www.colage.org/ A Support Group for TG Parents of Children. (Look at the Empower Tab for Helpful Resources about Coming-Out to Children)

I wish you Much Support in keeping your family together.

There are many members here that have stayed together since a Spouse Came-Out.

I wish you Success and Happiness on your Journey.

Hugs,

Carla

[Guest Sang]

thank you Carla this will be very helpful Hugs

[Guest Carla_Davis]

Even though your thanks are welcome, This is what Laura's Playground is about SUPPORT.

Hugs,

Carla

[Charlize]

Hi Sang and welcome to Laura's. I was up in Waterville and Livermore Falls just a bit ago. I have dear friends and relatives up there. They all met the new me and were kind and loving. My wife of 42 years is staying with me i'm glad to say. My therapist helped me to keep our relationship. It does take time and understanding. I've been full time now for over a year and she is still concerned about how people will react. A recent trip to Virginia helped with that. I was accepted as female in so many social situations by a very right wing political and religious group. Now she is also being able to deal with being perceived as a lesbian.

Take you time to find your path. We are all different and find peace in different ways. Hopefully you will find support and knowledge here that can help you. For me it was so important to know i wasn't alone. You are not alone either.

Hugs,

Charlie

[KathrynJulia]

Hello Sang and welcome to Laura's. Feel free to share as much or as little as you are comfortable with. It's hard opening up and telling others something so personal as being transgendered. We understand as we all have been there. Here are two links I have to help with finding a Gender Therapist practicing in your area.

Gender Therapists http://www.lauras-playground.com/gender_therapists.htm

Gender Therapist: http://www.therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/prof_search.php

Laura's Playground is about supporting each other. When other's don't understand, you can always finding people ready and willing to help support you through the tough times. That's what we do best for each other here. Kathryn

[Guest Sang]

an update
i have found a therapist in my area who has an opening that works with my schedule and my first appointment is in 1 week

and the local healthcare that i carry will cover it

it is a step forward

[Guest]

Congratulations Sang.

An appointment found and only a week away.

Things are lookiong up for you already.

Huggs,

Joann

[Guest Sang]

small update my therapist is really nice and it is a great relief to be able to talk to someone face to face about life in general (something i have never been able to do)

[Charlize]

That is wonderful news dear. When the snow flies you'll be cosy and opening up. A little openness and honesty goes a long way towards happiness.

Hugs,

Charlie

[Guest Carla_Davis]

Great news about your GT.

Remember, be Open and Honest with them. They want to help you and the more information they have to work with, the better the results.

Do not be embarrassed to talk about anything, as they have probably heard it before.

Keep us informed about further progress on your Journey.

I wish you continued Success and Happiness on your Journey.

Hugs,

Carla

[Guest Sang]

well its the day after Halloween and I went as Sang the kids had fun with it (to them it was just a costume) to me it was so much more.

it felt good to be able to be me for once out in the world i doubt anyone really suspected anything but then again it was Halloween.

it was just a tiny step (one i didn't really want to take but my wife suggested it) she may not like me dressed like that but at least she helped me

she is definitely a keeper no matter what happens.

thanks just wanted to say something its been a while

Sang :)

[Guest Rebecca A]

Hi Sang,

Welcome to Laura's it may have been a couple months, but you feel free to update us whenever you would like. I'm sure there is a lot of other interesting information that you have and will continue to find as you move forward. :: hugs :: wishing you well and continued successes.

[Guest ChefErik93]

nice to meet you sang! It sounds like your wife is supportive of you, which is great to hear. It is also wonderful that you found a therapist (and that your insurance will pay for it). Good luck with all of that and I hope that you can find as much support on here as i have. Laura's is super helpful...I hope to see you around the forums and chat rooms!

Erik