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Girl Advice


Guest MrAwesome

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Guest MrAwesome

Well, I think I'm ready for a girl friend. But I'm not really sure how to go about doing it. I'm 15 and 1/3, and I've NEVER had a girl friend, cept for 1 online. :( Should I go to some place more local, were there will be kids that that I know already, and will know of me... or should I try to go some were out of town? And when should I tell them that... well I guess the V factor, lol. And what's a good kind of place to meet girls? I'm probably gonna have to wait till I get my compression shirt, so it will take a little bit, but oh well. And also, what do 14-16 yr old girls like? In the looks Dept. that is?

- lewis

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Ok, I'm bad at this sort of thing. Lets see, first of all I'd say dating at young ages isn't always the best idea. I wasn't that intrested in dating when I was young. Infact, it took fives months being with my current boyfriend before I actually started to think of him as more then just a guy I like and I'm with. More then just a 'ok hes cool but I don't -love- him'. I'm most likely the hardest person to break for a relationship. If you really want to explore how it is to date then I would look around your school to see if theirs anyone there worth trying for but I wouldn't take it too seriously because dating young is more about learning what its like.

Once/if you find a girl then just learn about her and what she likes. Go from that to find out how you can make her smile. Be yourself, though. Don't be fake because lovers have a way of seeing through your fakeness. When I first started dating mine I tried acting more macho then I was to impress him but he likes me more this way - myself.

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Guest Little Sara

I'm not that interested by looks really, though I might not be in the majority.

What gets me is the personality. It must click with mine. Not that I'd date you, I'm a bit old at 26 (someone would shout statutory, but I'm not sure at who :P). But in general I mean, I look for someone who matches what I like and for whom I match what he likes. The likes must be aligned at least generally. Then the dislikes, there has to be no deal-breaker around. If this is fine, then yeah, I date, then see how it goes.

I like to know the person before dating them, either online or in person (but only got experience online). I don't date people for looks alone 'hoping for the best', this would so destroy me. I get attached real fast.

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Well I can tell you what teenaged girls liked when I was your age, NOT ME!

Honestly, I think that the generations starting right around mine and just after are in too big of a hurry to 'grow up' - enjoy being a kid for as long as you can, stretch it out all of the way through college and graduate school if you can manage it.

Relationships aren't easy and the start a lot earlier if you start dating early.

Find some girls that you like and just hang around with them, as friends with out the expense and commitment of dating.

I didn't date much because I was poor, unsure of what I wanted to do because of being trans (not really admitting it but it was always there) and not being terribly attractive to women as a boyfriend.

They all thought of me as safe, but I never went any where alone if I didn't want to.

Other guys always wanted to know how I managed to have three or more girls with me whenever I went anywhere - the answer is obvious now, it was a girl's night out.

Seriously, hang out with a group - all girls or mixed, have some fun and get comfortable with yourself around girls in a semi-dating atmosphere before you start out on your on.

Just a thought from a lady that was a guy in the old days.

Love ya,

Sally

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First, don't use the word "luvins" lol it reminds me of my exwife LOL

Sit back and get a seatbelt cuz I'm the one respondant who is not going to tell you "what do you wanna date for? enjoy being a kid." It is normal as a sexually maturing human being to want to date. Its normal for every orientaion, every gender, every whatever you can come up with if you are a teenager. Thats what the term "teenager" actually refers to; a time of sexual maturing physiologically. The social aspects, (if we go to how society measures when you're ready for x.y. and z) are actually (originally) measured against that. So for me, asking you "what do you wanna do that for?" is like saying "so why do you wanna keep growing up?" Either you will or you'll die or you'll be develpmentally stunted in some way. Those are the options that "stop" it.

That being said, before anything else, BE CAREFUL. Be careful what choices you will make while doing it. Be careful with your body because it is yours and you will be in it until you leave here so treat it like you will. And be careful with who you share "who you are" with because everybody is not worthy.

Now for your "how to's" ;) I don't think its necessary to "go out of town". That sounds like you're a sleazy old man doing something funny in a trench coat :D You're a regular teenager like everybody else, go where other people your age are who are likely to understand someone trans. Typically, that means an lgbt environment. From what I've seen all the teengers are kind of "smoshed" together so you might have to be "generally" social/ talk to people to locate/ identify girls who would be open to dating someone trans. Could you fish for "just any girl" outside of that pool? Certainly. But then you do have the "how do I broach the V" question to deal with AND the potential (and this is no small thing) that the girl might be freaked out, out you to her friends and they decide to "show you you can't just go around messing with their "normal" girls. The danger potential there might be more than you want to tamper with in the teen universe. That universe can become mighty small in those circumstances. You could find yourself "outed" and having that problem a lot of places since teens talk.

I definately like the idea of "just hanging out in a group". That relieves soooo much pressure. Plus (cough) its cheaper :blush: lol When you get into the "one on one, just the two of us" dating, girls are expensive. Two, three dollars here, two, three dollars there, next thing you know you're spendin your college loans and you haven't even got em yet :D And the stress :rolleyes: ? oy. A man who likes women will be stressed. They will see to it. Its their job. :D I love women. They let you enjoy em then twist you like a pretzel for "poops" and giggles.

What they like as far as looks changes somewhat depending on the times so theres a little bit of checkin in amongst your age group seeing "whats in" right now. HOWEVER, theres always the demand for every type. It may not be "the popular" look. But some girl doesn't like "what's popular". Best advice, make friends in the lgbt youth crowds, hang out, let peeps get to know your personality and let a gal like you for how you are and your interests.

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Guest Felicia Anne

please don't take this as lip service, mr. awesome, but the best thing you can do is to be yourself, enjoy yourself and love yourself.

i used to be on the other side of the fence where you are now, and i had those exact same feelings. but as much as you want that experience in your life, you need to show some of that exuberance, enthusiasm, and (above all else) love in and to yourself. if you do not have those elements in your own heart, it will be very difficult to find someone else to share those elements with. a long time ago, i read a passage that said "you cannot impart what you do not possess." and that is so true when it comes to relationships. and while dating and relationships aren't always on the same level of commitment and seriousness, the same rule applies to both.

my advice for you is to be true to your heart... find, explore and love the world around you... and tell yourself that you are a person who is loved and is worth loving. i promise that if you do that, things are going to open up for you as far as meeting quality people. i promise!

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