First Therapy Appointment!?

[Guest Liam]

I just scheduled my first therapy appointment for next Monday morning. I'm really excited about this, especially since I previously thought that there were no therapists in the area that had any experience with trans people, and I had been planning to just wait a few more years until I graduated from college. But I found this therapist, and I finally made an appointment, which is really awesome.

Here's the thing, though. I'm not very good at talking to people, especially people I don't really know. I'm worried that I'm just going to clam up and not say anything and basically waste both of our time. So, what I want to know is, how do therapy appointments usually go? Does the therapist ask guided questions and stuff, because I can probably handle that. Or do they just expect you to tell your story? Not so good. Or what? I really have no idea what to expect, and it's making me really nervous.

[Guest Donna Jean]

Liam, on getting the appointment! That's wonderful...

Now..............

I was very nervous at first, too.......didn't wanna do it...no...no...no....

But once I opended the door a crack and started to talk...well...I couldn't shut up! lol

It'll be OK, Hon.....they're there to help and they will....you will say later "Where did THAT come from?"! lol

It will all be good!

HUGGS

Donna Jean

[Sally]

Liam,

We all had our fears about that first session, some had been to therapists before but this session, the coming out to someone who knows something about the subject is frightening to us, but it is the greatest thing that can happen to you!

Maybe a bit of an over sell but I was terrified and almost didn't go to my first appointment - I am so glad I did, she has become one of my best friends and I look forward to every visit.

Let us all know how your first visit goes.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Christy.dancer]

Liam -- I LOVE my therapy sessions (Tuesday's -- tonight's the night!). It really gives me a chance to explore myself and what it means to be me. I'm on my third therapist -- my new one specializes in les/gay/tg issues -- and they've all been great.

Hugs -- best wishes.

[Guest julia_d]

I come from a place where TG is these days considered to be a medical not a mental health problem.. so we don't have the "therapy" aspect. Just one visit to a psychiatrist to get a box ticked before surgery.

Just go and be yourself.. they don't bite. It's ok to be nervous.. that's only natural and they are used to it, if not actually expecting it for your first time.

[Guest Elizabeth K]

I think this is one of the most asked questions here.

And it always seems scary thinking about seeing a therapist - but it won't be. Actually, the therapist is your best ally in transitioning. He/she wants you to be a happy person, and they may use slightly different ways to work with you, but most just want you to tell them a bit about yourself and how you feel. They are more concerned with the mind than with the body.

Anyway - I had a friend that had gone before so I asked her some of the same questions you are asking. Her advice? Be brutally honest

BE BRUTALLY HONEST? What does that mean? Tell him/her exactly how you feel - never what you think they want to hear. And if you feel like they are on your side - its rather easy.

But the shy part? What I did is, I knew they wanted to know about my life. I worked it through in my mind, and then took some quick notes so I wouldn't forget anything. I took those notes with me to the session.

I didn't use the notes - I already had my story in my mind and it just flowed out - almost a desparation! But the notes were there if I needed them.

I even told my therapist things I had forgotten - it just happens that way. She listened to EVERYTHING! She told me I was probably transsexual in the first 30 minutes of the session. I asked if I was that transparent? She said it was written across my forehead - wow.

I felt so GOOOD afterward. Everything in my life suddenly made sense.

you are gonna LOVE therapy!

Lizzy

[Guest Liam]

Thanks for the encouragement/advice, everyone. I feel a little better. I'll let you all know how it goes.

[Guest Evan_J]

Do everything everyone says -especially Lizzy as far as having some notes just in case he actually does ask for "your life story". But, in my case anyway, I never had to worry about that, he had a pretyped packed he wanted completed and it was so long it took till the second appt to complete. Some people have had that experience. Either way, remember these sessions are something you set up so you run it. You didn't get "summoned" to therapy. This is someone you hire.

He got hired. He can be fired.

You run the show.

[Guest Liam]

Well, all that and I didn't even go. When I talked to the therapist to make an appointment, she said she would take my insurance, but when I called my insurance company this morning to get authorized, they said they wouldn't accept any out-of-network providers. So I canceled my appointment, since I really can't afford to pay out-of-pocket right now. But the therapist said she might be willing to see me for just the cost of what my copay would have been, plus she's updating the insurance companies she's affiliated with, so there's hope for the future. It's just kind of disappointing. And I woke up an hour early for nothing.

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Liam

AWWWWWWW thats TERRIBLE!

Hang in there - you just gotta get that going.

Sweetheart - I sure hear your pain - hang tough!

Let us know as you get more info!

DARN DARN DARN

Lizzy

[Sally]

But the therapist said she might be willing to see me for just the cost of what my copay would have been, plus she's updating the insurance companies she's affiliated with, so there's hope for the future.

Keep her name, that offer is the sign of a therapist that is truly interested in you and your well being, not just in buying a new Mercedes.

Keep in touch with her, she's a keeper.

You will get it all worked out, sorry you got up early for nothing.

Hang in there, we're still here for you and we don't rquire any insurance!

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Liam]

Well, I had my appointment. She basically told me that she saw that I was comfortable with myself, and she wants to focus on other issues. She told me I have/had social anxiety disorder, which I've known for years but never told anyone. So we're working on that. That's fine with me; I want to be able to talk to people. I think she expected me to come in there having issues about being trans. I don't. I've been working through this on my own for the last two years, and I'm finally comfortable with who I am. I don't even know why I'm in therapy to begin with. I can't begin pursuing hormones yet because I'm not out to my extended family yet, and that's important to me and my parents. And I don't feel like I need therapy for my psychological well-being. Except maybe the social anxiety bit; it'll be good to work that out. But whatever. The appointment went well, and the therapist person seems nice. So, all in all, better than I expected.

[Guest Little Sara]

You can start hormones without people finding out for a while though. I know testosterone has faster effects than estrogen (of the irreversible kind), but I doubt it would be noticeable before some months.

[Guest XCrystalX]

Wow! Good luck! My first appointment is today also!