Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Going Public, First Time


Guest Angel Eyez

Recommended Posts

Guest Katie-Louise

Whats going public like the first time either sometime this year or next i'm going to go public for the first time i'm really nervous. would like to hear some of your stories about going public first time might settle my nerves down a bit, thanks love from katie^^

Link to comment
Guest Sophie Jean

The first time I introduced myself as Sophie in the real world it took me two tries. No kidding. On May 7 of this year, my company sponsored me to a programming conference in San Francisco. The day I flew out, my wife provided me with makeup she had acquired through her Clinique visits, after I told her I was going to get a wig before catching the plane. I figured if I couldn't actually do it in San Fransisco, I couldn't do it anywhere. I had even researched where there was going to be a Drag performance when I got there. So I packed skirts and blouses, makeup and polish, and figured I could get away with my low-cut black boots.

That night, in preparation, I decided to go out in white women's jeans and a black blouse. I shaved my face and put on foundation, brushing out my wig. I was going for the androgynous look, hoping to transform with the rest of the makeup and wig when I got to the bar. After a mile walk down telegraph hill, I found the bar was closed. So I found someone on the street and asked them where transgendered people hang out, and he took me two blocks to an after-dinner club. Thanking him, I went inside and got depressed while sipping on my drink. My wig and purse still remained in my plastic bag. All the action was in another room behind curtains. I told the bartendress about my situation, and being my first night out and all. After a while, I just figured what the heck, and went to see what was left of the show and dancing. I didn't realize there were a lot of crossdressers there. They just looked normal, if a little dated.

After a bit, everyone came back out to the bar proper, and a gentleman with a revenge of the nerds haircut started talking with me. I told him about my situation, and wasn't sure about makeup and he responded by asking the girl on his arm (whom I suddenly noticed was a crossdresser herself) who I could talk to about makeup. Unfortunately, she wasn't very helpful and was a little stuck up. When I got my opportunity, I left the bar. But on the way back, being late, I ducked through an alley and put on my wig and makeup, walking the one mile back up telegraph hill to my hotel.

And here we come to May 8. This night, the club was open. I was in such a hurry to finish shaving my legs, I drew blood in fairly large scrapes. I attempted to cover them up with makeup--ouch! So I got ready as I did the night before, this time I wore my orange blouse, and packed my brown printed skirt in the bag. I got to an alley in the meat district and applied my wig and the rest of my makeup. From there, I proceeded to the club where the drag show--starring Heklina--was to be performed. I rapidly found another tgirl and asked where I could change. She pointed me to the one bathroom in the entire club. In there, I changed out of my slacks into my skirt, put on my accessories, and headed back to the bar. It was an amazing performance. After the show, a young lady next to me couldn't believe it was my first time out and introduced me her CD girlfriend standing right next to me. We talked, and I was introduced to another tgirl, who told me where all the best hangouts to go to were. Then they took pictures, including me. I never felt so accepted as I did that night.

First chance I got, I started planning my getaway. I headed to the bathroom to change, and a gentleman that really had to pee held the door open for me! Wow! I made it a point to change as quickly as I could back into my jeans since he was so nice. That complete, I headed out the door. There were a number of people out front, so I ducked around the corner to take off the wig. Some other guys came around the corner before I perform the last bit of transformation. One guy was nervously trying to hit on me, before his buddies came around the corner, teasing each other. At one point, while I was waiting for the all clear, I looked down to see a boy thing being stroked between two of the guys! Much more than I wanted to see, let me tell you. Anyway, they started getting more and more wild with one another, and I took the opportunity to walk back to the hotel room.

I went out two more nights that week while I was in San Francisco to a different club, and I came back home craving more. I decided then that I needed to get out in public at least once a month, and I needed to be with other people like myself.

I hope you have a great and safe adventure hun,

- Sophie Jean

Link to comment
Guest Traci Nicole

I've went public wearing jewelry, wormen's jeans, and some women's shirts and I'm not nervoues or even embarrased at all. I've been doing this for about an over one year. My next thing, in going into public with is to get fitted with a wig before my next Support Group Meeting in October 2007. Than that will be a another step into womanhood for me. The best thing to remember is to not get nervous, the more you get nervous the harder it will be for you. just be calm, cool, and collected, and It will work out.

Link to comment
Guest Katie-Louise

Going public first time more than likely 20th October with other tg/ts people who live in the west midlands/ birmingham area and ive written to a phyciatrist who specializes in GID (Gender Dypsphoria) and she is allowed to prescribe meds once diagnosed and evaluated etc. Looking forward to the appointment and going out in public for the first time ^^

Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...

My first time in public was going to my therapist's office,

It was about ten or fifteen miles from my home.

I was wearing this cute cute mini dress,brown.

I couldn't walk in heels worth a darn,but wear them i did.

Full makeup,and all the accesories including perfume.

And i was large and Very Muscular.

Did i care?Not in the least.I felt good/right.

No No No,i take that back.

My first encounter with my female image was when i was sixteen.

I"borrowed" a white with blue anchors halter dress from my girlfriend.

Nobody was home for the weekend.And my girl"Had To"come out to play.

All i did was walk the neighborhood,enjoying my freedom to express my femininity.

But that was all on the sly,the only one to know was me.

Kinda set the tone for my life early.

Angie

Link to comment

Morning Ladies,

My one piece of advice on wigs...

Wear it around the house until you get used to wearing it.

I mean wear it daily/make it feel like your own hair.

That way when you do go public...you wont keep your head and neck stiff.

Nothing will get you noticed like walking around with a stiff neck.

Be relaxed and casual...and You Will Be Just Another Girl Out And About.

Really...It Works.

Angie.

Link to comment
Guest Kimberley Jackson

ive been out a few times as kimberley but at night and in the dark lol, i feel safe then so just slip on some jeans a top and heels and walk out. I walk for hours just wishing i was like it all the time and occasionally the odd dog walker walks past havnt had any comments yet but i feel its easier to walk past other woman than it is men but it has helped my confidence a lot just need a wig now :) xx kim

Link to comment
Guest Katie-Louise

I'm going out in public for the first time 2morrow i'm excited but really nervous. I'm going to my counsellor and sunday shopping. lots of love, katie louise

xxxxxx

Link to comment
I'm going out in public for the first time 2morrow i'm excited but really nervous. I'm going to my counsellor and sunday shopping. lots of love, katie louise

xxxxxx

Hoi katie louise,

What I see on the picture in your profile, I think it will not be a problem at all. Do not over due it in make-up and clothes. No heels more the 4 cm because that will feel more comfortable. and you can walk more female without balancing on bad side walks. ( It need some experience walking real sexy on high heels, better do that when you feel more comfortable. If you have a wig or own hair, visit a hairdresser first, it will make the difference. Woman do that often anyhow

http://www.lauras-playground.com/forums/st...efault/wink.gif

If people (woman) on the street "scan" you they look at hair and shoes, the thing in between are less important.

And I have some experience being post op since 1982.

All the best and let us know.

Kind regards

Ellen

Link to comment

Kia ora, KL,

I tell this to all who are going 'OUT' for the first time...Start visulising what you want to feel like and want to happen at the end of your 'OUTING'. For example how GOOD you're going to feel when your therapist tells you how lovely you look and how natural you are in the female [or in the case of F2Ms] male role. YOU DON'T HAVE TO VISULISE WHAT HAPPENS DURING YOUR SESSION WITH THE COUNSELOR...JUST HOW GOOD YOU ARE GOING TO FEEL AFTER-TRUST YOUR 'SUB CONSCIOUS' IT WILL TAKE CARE OF THE REST !...I know you are going to be great KL...I've already read your 'future' post ! ;)B):)

Metta Jendar

Link to comment

:rolleyes: Most people only make mistakes because they THINK they will...thought always comes before actions ! If we think somethings going to be difficult...it will be difficult. Have faith in yourself and trust your best friend...your SUB CONSCIOUS ! It will only fail you if you want to fail.

Every morning I wake up knowing that I'm going to have a great day and guess what... like magic it happens I have a great day. It all depends on ones outlook on life. Happiness never passes me by...it's waits patiently by my bedside each morning. -_-:)-_-:) Here I go again rattling on in my philosophical manner...sorry about that.

Metta Jendar

Link to comment
:rolleyes: Most people only make mistakes because they THINK they will...thought always comes before actions ! If we think somethings going to be difficult...it will be difficult. Have faith in yourself and trust your best friend...your SUB CONSCIOUS ! It will only fail you if you want to fail.

Every morning I wake up knowing that I'm going to have a great day and guess what... like magic it happens I have a great day. It all depends on ones outlook on life. Happiness never passes me by...it's waits patiently by my bedside each morning. -_-:)-_-:) Here I go again rattling on in my philosophical manner...sorry about that.

Metta Jendar

Feeling down, dress up !!

Ellen

Link to comment
Guest Eva Jean

i hope your first day out went well, katie-louise. i would really like to her about as i'm sure many others would. i've been too afraid to so far but might soon but its cool to hear that you have overcome what i see a s major hurdle in the first day out thing

Link to comment

Girls,

Looking at some of your pictures....hmmmm,she can pass easy,is my thoughts.

Now girls,the thing is don't make eye contact,just shop or whatever it will be,and enjoy yourself.

And when or if you get made/clocked...big deal.

Most wont say anything...if they do...ignore them,revel in your womanhood.

The first time is the hardest...it only becomes easy with much much practice and experience.

Above All...Enjoy The Real You.

Big Hugs Sisters O Mine,

Love,Angie.

Link to comment
Guest Lethalia

Hey there, Katie-Louise. OwUB? IBOK.

I am very curious as to how your first outing went. Katie-Louise, seriously, you are very pretty and should not worry too much about it. Don't get nervous. Do what you do… shop, smile, laugh, eat, drink, and be merry. If you are made, most people will not say anything. If they do, be kind and let them be in their own private Idaho (their own world). This is coming from a girl that gets made every time, no fail. It is my face that gives me away… not my body. Getting made has never stopped me or made me feel bad in any way whatsoever. It would be so wonderful to be as pretty as many of the girls I see here. But hey, all I ever wanted was everything.

A note here: I've no idea what your piece of the world is like. Just in case, I would like to say, be careful of where you travel alone. Do as I say, not as I do. I am a frail girl, but I look scary in my mourning black and extreme accouterments. So I do not appear the sweet little girl. You do. Be safe… as any genetic girl would too. Again, I am very curious as to how your first outing went.

Being Lorelei Gilmore…

Isabella Lethalia Innocenzi

Link to comment
Guest Katie-Louise

I went out and I passed it was nerve racking at first I wouldn't get out of the car was really scared but I finally just thought why not it's who I am and if people don't like it it's there problem no one was suspicious which was good it really gave me a confident boost after the disappointment earlier in the week which caused me to be suicidal again i must be a fighter after all the knock backs in my life i'm still fighting to be me and no one can deny me that. Were I live its very rough so to perfectly pass was a relief :lol: lots of love,

Katie

xxxxxx

Link to comment

Katie,

I hope you made it out and that it was nothing but positive.

Now,let me tell all about my REAL FIRST TIME.

My girlfriend Toni,invited me to go shopping in one of the malls in town.

I had been to group,and i had gone to the store,but i was always a bundle of nerves in public.

I couldn't relax and enjoy the experience at all.

Then came Miss Toni.She has been a woman for many years.

And to her IT IS NORMAL.

That girl is one out there kind of girl.

We went into shop after shop,and for the first time i got to try on dresses in a womans dressing room!

You want to talk about excited?Fear...what fear?Toni wouldn't allow me the time to be selfconsious.

"Come on Angie!We've got alot more stores to go to,let's go!"

It was so fun choosing blouses and skirts,pants and shorts,trying on sunglasses and hats.

I forgot all about being out in public for the first time really as a woman.

And the way she interacted with the clerks and other women shoppers was absolutely hilarious.

She would joke and cut up,flirt with the pretty ones.WOW...what an eye opening experience.

Did i buy anything?No,then again i didn't need to.I was doing what girls do when they want to have fun.

Shop until you drop.That girl kept me at the mall for hours and hours.

Until i i felt like a real girl.

Talk about life changing experiences.

I will never forget it.

Nor will i ever be able to thank Toni enough for giving me such a valuable experience.

Remember girls,take a chance,go with a friend,and above all...Relax And Have Fun. :D

Hugs,

angie :P;)

Link to comment

That is a cool storie Angie, and I hope you hade a great time Katie. Have you ever noticed that there is like a 50-50 draw to people who have had luck and those that seem to find no reprieve. It is kind of interesting, I would really enjoy having a friend like your Toni, it would be great.

Link to comment

If you think you will fail...YOU WILL FAIL..If you think SUCCESS YOU WILL SUCCEED AND CONFIDENCE IS ALL YOU NEED ! At the old place where I worked on every wall was a big sign 'I CAN' [a form of subliminal persuasion] everywhere one looked was the sign 'I CAN' and after a while I must admit I DID. ;)

Metta Jendar :)

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   4 Members, 0 Anonymous, 99 Guests (See full list)

    • Dani_
    • Andy C.
    • Betty K
    • Karen Carey
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.9k
    • Total Posts
      771k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,144
    • Most Online
      8,356

    CrystalMarie
    Newest Member
    CrystalMarie
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. DaveMK
      DaveMK
    2. Heidi45
      Heidi45
      (46 years old)
    3. Jordy
      Jordy
      (42 years old)
    4. stella
      stella
      (61 years old)
  • Posts

    • awkward-yet-sweet
      I'm finally home after a really long day.  I haven't been online much because I've been with my husband, helping the victims of the tornado in the neighboring county.   A lot of progress has been made in 4 days.  Some electricity has been restored, and wreckage has been cleared away from the roads.  We got the kitchen and lodging areas set up for the folks who lost their homes, so hopefully local folks can take over now.  Its amazing how much food has been donated so far, and clothes being collected.  My husband's company donated electrical equipment, and the time of work crews to install it.  They're going to be really busy in the coming weeks, with work locally, producing parts, and fulfilling orders from other areas.  So many places have been severely damaged in recent weeks.    For the moment, my part in the work is completed.  Now comes the next struggle - taking care of my husband.  He was finally able to come home tonight, since the situation is stable and their local people are gradually taking over.  But he stayed awake from Sunday morning until this evening, working constantly with only brief naps.    I'm already getting the medicines prepared, because I know he'll have a cold or the flu by this weekend.      Very true.  I think they have been teaching math in a different way for the last 30 years.  Kids aren't proficient in it...I know I'm not.  My husband believes in knowing how to do calculations on paper, just in case.  Its interesting to watch him scratch a few figures on the back of a receipt, just to check.  I never fully learned long division in school, and anything algebra was way beyond me.  Easy enough to get a passing grade without really knowing the material.  I've slowly learned some of what I should have known years ago...
    • EasyE
      Vicky is spot on. Find a therapist who can help you walk through these next steps. That did so much for me just to have someone there to listen, smile, ask me lots of questions and validate all my thoughts and feelings. It has helped me find me!   I am no professional, just a friend on the journey who wants you to know that you are not alone, you are in great company here and that you are a one-of-a-kind treasure. Best wishes and blessings to you!   EasyE
    • EasyE
      So ...  I obeyed the request you all made to talk with my doc about my fatigue. Thanks for looking out for me!!   He ordered blood work last week and thankfully there are no issues with my thyroid or other things being out of balance (my potassium is back in normal range).   The only flag on the test: My T is low! That is without spiro (and maybe was low even before I began HRT?? Just my speculation)   My E levels are on the high end of the normal range. Waiting for the doc's report on everything. I likely saw the test results before he did... thanks for your concern. 
    • missyjo
      hi friends so I'm reading on electrolysis n it seems it's touchy or bad for epilepsy    does anyone have input on safely getting electrolysis with epilepsy?    good providers..even if doctors? thank you
    • EasyE
      Congrats on this step of your journey... will be interesting to see how things go for you as I am only about eight weeks ahead and doing a little different plan... I did a lot of reading on estrogen monotherapy (no spiro) and my doc was OK starting me on an E patch alone. I have already stepped up the dosage once... I have experienced some mild effects thus far. Some "plumping" in my chest (that at least I have noticed) and a little more roller coaster emotions being the biggest...   Enjoy the ride. Welcome to the party. As others have shared, there are a lot of great, thoughtful people on here. I like to draw from the many varied experiences others have had and am learning a lot from that! Blessings to you!!   Easy
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      My cooking the last few days has all been in large batches, and not at home.  I guess my skills feeding a large family helped, since I've been working in an aid kitchen for folks who are now homeless because of a tornado.  Simple food, in really big pots.  Here's a simple but filling "guideline" (I won't call it a recipe) for something you can throw together to feed a crowd:   Red lentils and barley in equal quantities Meat of some kind - sausage, chicken...even Spam or hot dogs can work Onions Celery Something green - swiss chard, bok choy, cabbage.... whatever.    Add spices.  Salt, pepper, oregano, and maybe a bit of cumin.  Taste and adjust ingredients.  Boil while stirring, making sure nothing sticks to the bottom.  This soup should be thick, almost to the point of the spoon being able to stand up straight in the pot.  When serving, you can garnish with a tomato slice and a bit of sour cream, if you have it.    This kind of food is very filling, cheap and easy to make, and has a lot of protein.  Not just from the meat, but from the combined complimentary amino acids of the lentils and barley.  You could also use wheat and rice, beans and rice, or similar.  Its a good recipe for people in need of simple nourishment and fuel for hard work. 
    • VickySGV
      All of these are very common things that have been discussed by our members here over the years.  It sounds very much to me that you need to find a Therapist who deals in Gender issues and get some therapy going.  Where it will eventually take you is not mine or anyone else here's position to tell you who or how you wish to live as, but we can be here to tell you that you are not wrong for having those feelings or questions.  Because you have questions, you have at least a chance of finding answers.  Welcome to the Forums.
    • benwitz2
      This might be really long so apologies in advance. I (26 y/o AMAB) was raised by two women. I have an older sister. All of my role models growing up were wonderful, mostly gay, women; the few male adults I had in my life were angry and abusive. My grandfather beat and psychologically tormented my mom and her twin brother. Whether that's the reason I'm not sure, but there was never any attempt to get me a male role model through a Big Brother program or anything like that. From a young age I felt intense alienation and shame for being male. When I went through puberty I started experiencing social dysphoria. My mannerisms, worldview, likes, dislikes, access to and depth of emotion, conceptions of friendship, intimacy, and romance, etc.-- all of it was/is squarely on the feminine side of the supposed binary. I have very few masculine aspects of self. I feel like a girl in spirit. This is not about the physical body for me, or it at least it wouldn't be if gender wasn't assigned by sex. In the summer of high school I finally met a man who was a beautiful and positive role model for masculinity, but he got terminally ill after one summer. During that summer I didn't feel any more masculine, but I at least had finally found a man that wasn't thrown by that-- he met me where I was, and treated me like he a son or little brother. I don't know if I experience gender dysphoria. I don't have any acute sense of body dysmorphia, but I don't like being seen or thought of as a man. I feel like I'm always performing or lying. I don't identify with my post-pubescent body. Being a boy was ok, but not a man (apparently Contrapoints said that too?). I don't HATE the hair on my chest. I can appreciate it in a detached way. It makes me feel adult, but I don't feel like a man with hair on his chest, if that makes sense. I don't like the message it sends to the world. And while I don't crave a vagina just for its material existence, I want people to treat me like I have one (breasts I'm still considering). I despise my bass singing voice and could count on my fingers how many times I've used it in my life. Sometimes I wish I were gay so that any of this made any sense. When I was 11 or 12 I had a massive, acute existential crisis that led to me going non verbal for a day, and I've been dissociating ever since with some episodes of depersonalization/derealization. Every day I wake up feeling grief and guilt. I used to pin all this on my moms' separation, but that's starting to feel more and more like a red herring. Recently I have theorized that that has something to do with the beginning of puberty, and that I removed myself from my body when it began to develop. It's very hard for me to "inhabit" my body, and when I do, all I feel is that grief. It's a very odd sensation-- it feels like I used to have this little sister who died when I was a kid. Last night a song from my early childhood brought back what felt like repressed emotions, and I sobbed harder than I have in years. I was racked with grief over a death that never happened of someone I never knew. The obvious trans reading of that is that that little sister was me, and I went into exile when puberty hit. I don't want to transition or be a trans girl-- I want to wake up having been a cis girl this whole time. And to be honest I want to want to be trans so that I can get over this fear and just start transitioning. Others have described their trans awakening as joyful, but all I feel is anger and grief for the way I was born. I am worried that this signals that it's more of an interpersonal schism/learned hatred of being a "man" than it is "genuine" transgenderism. Is it a thing to not want to transition at all, to not want to be transgender, but to want to be just cis of your preferred sex? What if I'm just a really feminine guy, and I'm stuck, as I want to act feminine and be perceived as feminine, but I'm not actually transgender? And if that's true, why do I still want to be transgender? I'm not asking for anyone to tell me whether or not I'm trans, I am just wondering if anyone sees themselves in these experiences.
    • Mikayla2024
      YASSSSSS GIRL!! 🥳🥳🥳   Such a small world, Kathy!! If you live in NS, you’re def a bluenoser in my eyes ⛴️ !! 😊    But thank you so much for the response and advice!! Everyone’s HRT path is def different and I realize that, I’m just thankful that I’m finally starting somewhere and you’re right having the script has totally relieved my dysphoria symptoms even more! It’s like a big weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I can finally start the transitioning process !!   The way I see it, It’s only 4 weeks or 28 days on Spiro then I’ll be on Estrogen pills along with it. So, it’s going to come much sooner than I would’ve liked to realize. I just have to trust the process as I’m her first patient ever to do a full transition from the beginning and the fact that she’s willing to take me on and learn about it at the same time makes me really comfortable and trust in her process. The thing I like about her is that she told me she took an online course on gender affirming care on her own time specifically for me. So I believe she might know a thing or two.    We have a plan to do that for 6 months to 1 year and if everything is good with my labs then it’ll be injections and I hear that alone is enough to suppress T once it’s suppressed by the original regiment. 
    • Betty K
      That’s a brilliant analogy! 
    • VickySGV
      Now that you put it that way, I fully agree on its potential for those putting together educational guidelines.  One of my HMO's medical centers, has a garden plot with ONLY our local plants that are poisonous to human beings as part of our diet or skin absorbtion for teaching purposes.  I can easily the document as that sort of display. 
    • Betty K
      I think there is one (and probably only one) way to positively view the Cass Review: it collects all the most powerful weapons of the “gender critical” movement into one convenient repository, at least as regards gender-affirming care. To me, it’s like a crash course in how to fight GC ideology and advocate for trans kids. I am seeing it as my doctorate in the topic.
    • Vidanjali
      That's great. I hope it's a peaceful time of renewal for you.
    • VickySGV
      They have done so already I am afraid.  Nothing new really, but Cass included views of our home brewed bigots to create this. 
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Met up with a teacher I had back in high school and went good.Was 27 years ago I last saw her after I graduated.Walked into her classroom and we hugged calling me Adrianna.Remembered seeing me as male seeing I was holding something in.Told her I am much happier now and said she noticed it now.Even said seen me as an 18 year old and now as a 45 year old transwoman.Did get to walk down the halls bringing back lots of memories too.Ran into another teacher I had too.She said I changed big time.Told her I go as Adrianna now,transgender on the hormones.Also said she noticed I was unhappy at times and I am much happier now.I did take a picture with both of these two
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...