The Gift Of Three Years

[JJ]

Yesterday marked the third anniversary of my first injection. When the journey became a reality and a commitment for me and for those who loved me. It was a day after I got the T because I thought it over for almost 24 hours. I had no doubts about who I am or about what I wanted- but this was a leap into the unknown and I had no way of foreseeing where it would take me personally. I could find no record anywhere of anyone else accomplishing what I was setting out to do-transition as an FTM and lose 200 lbs over 60 years old. In fact still haven't. For me there was no road map or information to guide me. I suppose my greatest fear was ending up neither here nor there. Failing in my quest and putting us all through this for no gain

I did not have great expectations. For me any change was better than where I was. A couple of months before, when I decided to transition, I had started losing weight and was down around 40 lbs but still bedridden and reaching for something I suspected was well beyond my grasp. I may never know how I had the faith and courage to try again at life after failing for so long but this time at least I knew why and that was perhaps the difference. And for me it would be enough if I could be called "Sir" or seen as the man I am just once IRL before I died. To be able to walk at least the length of my house alone and cook a microwave dinner.

There were challenges and times it was difficult. This isn't about that really but it wouldn't be fair to say "Wow look what happened" without saying it was sometimes difficult. That I had after a lifetime of fighting finally broken and it was with the grace of God I found the strength and courage to do this. I mean that literally. And with the help and encouragement I found here. A triumvirate that made it all possible. God, Laura's and myself.

I posted a similar pic in another forum showing what change has been. The red haired pic was about 5 years old. My drivers license and a temporary hair change to a color that also runs in my family -the blond pic is 6 years old and tightly laced into a corset in that pic as well-I gained a lot of additional weight after both when I became more bedridden. The middle pic in the first set was when I had my first injection 3 years ago and as male as I could get at the time. The last pic in each case was taken yesterday in the woods because it was the anniversary.

My purpose here is to celebrate the gift of these last 3 years - I never in my highest hopes and expectations even thought I would still be alive in 3 years much less out in the woods I love reveling in climbing the hills and exploring the rough terrain- but more importantly to say if I can do this then anyone can remake their lives and live their dream.

And to say thank you -to my Creator, to Laura's-and yes to myself. While I am proud of what I accomplished I am far more humble and amazed by it instead.

Life CAN still be good. Go for it-dream big and just keep trying. You never know just how far you can go.

With loving gratitude

Johnny

[Guest Aylen]

You've given me such hope.

Thank you for sharing your experiences and

Touching my heart. You've kept the

Inspiration alive in me!

Thank you Johnny!

Aylen

[Charlize]

Johnny you are always an inspiration. The wisdom you have shared with all of us has come from struggles and the gifts we are given here and through the struggles you have found a power to help with. I think all of this growth is beyond our ability without help from others and a higher power. You have opened to that and are willing to share the wisdom gained. Thank you for being yourself, vulnerable, and if you would forgive me for the female connotation, beautiful. Sorry but while you are handsome the light within is best described by the word beauty.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Bulldog1948]

Johnny, You, my brother, are truly an inspiration to anyone who needs to transition. Those 5 pics document the great changes that you and your body have gone through. If someone didn't know you they woud swear that those were pics of 5 different people, but we know better.

I wish that you would do a bit for utube on this. Plus, you really need to find the time to write a book. You have so much to offer and a good, inspiring FTM book is hard to come by.

I am honored to call you my brother.

Mike

[Carolyn Marie]

Congratulations on three years of success and change, Johnny. Your words, deeds and pictures do inspire and give hope to those who think it can't ever happen to them. It can, and it does.

Not everyone wants or needs to transition socially. It isn't always necessary to be happy. But for those with the need and desire to do so, successes like yours need to be pointed out. No one should have to wait as long as you or I did to follow our dreams, these days especially. But even if you are a latecomer, dreams can be realized.

Thanks for who you are, and for what you do and say. They are important. So are you, my friend.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest thevaliantx]

Johnny, since I am MtF (sometimes mybmind tells me that it means Messed Up to Up), your journey to being the dude that you are never seemed to apply to me. So, I never finished reading anything of your's that I started; yet what little I did read I could tell that that you know your stuff. Are you a therapist by trade? If not, you should be. Do you have kids? You would make one hell of a dad. I would trade my father for you in a moment's notice.

Edited March 9, 2014 by Carolyn Marie
Starred word to get past word filter deleted, per the T & Cs

[Guest LizMarie]

A friend posted the following on Facebook today.

"Stan Lee is 90 years old.

Which means

He created Spiderman

When he was 40.

Which means you

Haven't even started

To live your life."

It made me smile and gave me pause for thought.

Congratulations, Johnny! You've been an inspiration to me absolutely and for that, I thank you profusely.

[Guest Jtlloyd64]

Congratulations Johnny !!

You Truely have given this ole man some hope , the hope that I too can be there someday !!

You are an inspiration !!

Jamie