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Guest renee24

Im 24 and ive known ive wantd to be a girl sense my earliest memories as a child. ive secretly crossdressd all of my life. when i was little i borrowd a few outfits from my mothers closet and wore them in my room and one day that week she found them but never said anything i was scared to death. Now i really want to come out to her and tell her ive always wanted to be her daughter and i want to transition. I have no idea what to do, im so scared

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Guest Kelly Ann

Hi Renee...at 24 she probably has more of an idea than you realize. Generally parents are two steps ahead of you and the very best let you learn for yourself...all the while guiding you along as it were. The best way is to start some sort of conversation and keep it light...mind, not a joke...feel the water and slowly ease in. Personal experience with friends tells me some can handle it some can't...other's just get more confused than me, LOL. Parents ARE different though and generally really love their children, this is a genetic thing and runs deeper than you might guess...so it may take them a second, or two, if they have walked through life with their eyes closed...but they will usually still love you for who you are...they may not fully understand it at first. This is where you have to allow for some give and take if you love them in return. Honest conversation it THE absolute best place to start though, with anyone. Good luck dear, Kelly Ann

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Guest ~Brenda~

Dearest Renee,

I replied to your introduction, and I suggest that you read it. Do not be afraid, be yourself, and it will all be OK. Relax, and know we are here to support you. Don't worry, as each day passes, it gets better!!

Love,

bernie

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Renee,

That is the hardest thing to do, come out to your parents.

The most important thing is to be positive, this is not tragic, there is a treatment available and once the mind and body are in alignment you can live a wonderful life as a woman free from the tortures of having your mind and body at war with each other.

Don't start and then stop, it makes you seem unsure.

That's about all I can offer.

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest renee24

Hi again, i just took the gender identity test and like i knew im a female inside. Scored a 405. Itappears i need immediate help. To bad i cant show that to my mother

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Hi again, i just took the gender identity test and like i knew im a female inside. Scored a 405. Itappears i need immediate help. To bad i cant show that to my mother

Oh my!

405! Get her into ER!

Start her on an Estrogen IV - STAT!

That's a pretty high score, I was a mere 375!

Sorry but there is no way that she will believe the test results (they really aren't that scientific but they are pretty good indicators)

If you want someone to talk to her, you can have her PM me and I can try to explain to her why it is so much better to resolve your issues now as opposed to 33 years later!

Good luck, I hope she will listen.

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest ~Brenda~

Dear Sally and Renee,

Please forgive my ignorance, but what is this test you are talking about? I think, I need to take this test.

bernie

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Guest renee24
Oh my!

405! Get her into ER!

Start her on an Estrogen IV - STAT!

That's a pretty high score, I was a mere 375!

Sorry but there is no way that she will believe the test results (they really aren't that scientific but they are pretty good indicators)

If you want someone to talk to her, you can have her PM me and I can try to explain to her why it is so much better to resolve your issues now as opposed to 33 years later!

Good luck, I hope she will listen.

Love ya,

Sally

Thank you.hehe... the thing is i know i need to see someone about this but im just so scared to tell her who i really am. i always try giving hints hoping she might wonder why im always watching qvc. but nothing i just sit there trembling. idk how she would take it, shes always wanted a daughter tho.

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Guest renee24
Dear Sally and Renee,

Please forgive my ignorance, but what is this test you are talking about? I think, I need to take this test.

bernie

Its called the Cogiati test, i believe. i wish i had written down the link. I think it was in the transexual, transgener forum.

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Guest ~Brenda~

Hi Renee, Sally, and Naomi,

I took COGIATI test today (at work!!) and although I did not score as high as you. I was still very pleased to get affirmation as to what I already knew about myself. My score was a mere 250 (but I am very pleased with it!!). Below is the report.

The

COMBINED GENDER IDENTITY AND TRANSSEXUALITY INVENTORY

(COGIATI)

Your COGIATI result value is: 250 Which means that you fall within the following category:

COGIATI classification FOUR, PROBABLE TRANSSEXUAL

What this means is that the Combined Gender Identity And Transsexuality Inventory has classified your internal gender identity to be essentially feminine, but with some masculine or androgynous traits. It is very possible that you are a candidate for a diagnosis of transsexualism. You show a strong degree of gender dysphoria. At the very least, further investigation should be undertaken. Your COGIATI score places you among the majority of those diagnosed as transsexuals, the 'late onset' tanssexual.

SUGGESTIONS FOR ACTION:

Your situation is potentially serious and indicative of a probable inborn gender conflict. It is definitely recommended that you pursue further action.

The suggestions for your circumstance are several.

It is recommended that you seek help from a sympathetic counselor or professional about your gender issues. It is very possible that over time they will become increasingly difficult to cope with. Early determination of what you really need and want is vital. You need to determine if you truly are transsexual. Keep in mind, thought, that many alternatives exist other than complete sexual transformation. Partial transformation and many other way of existing are available. While you are very possibly a transsexual, COGIATI has determined that this is not absolutely certain. While time is an issue, being certain is more important. Proceed with investigation of your possible transsexuality or transgenderism, but with caution.

Some actions may help you to define your needs more clearly. Experimenting with living full time as a woman, taking hormones for a short time under supervision, or taking testosterone suppressers to observe how you feel are all viable options. Keep in mind that while it is very likely that you might be a transsexual, it is not certain. Do not take severe or permanent actions without long thought and the help of counselors and professionals.

Your gender issues are real, and should not be ignored. Neither should you rush into acting on them, however powerful they may feel. You do not fit the full criterion for the rarest classification, classic transsexuality, and so should be cautious, and open to possibilities. You may yet end up undergoing transition, and the path of the transsexual may well be your salvation. Be very careful, but do not ignore your issues.

If you have not already, consider joining any of the thousands of groups devoted to gender expression of various kinds. There is literally a world of friends to discover who share your interests. There are also publications, vacations, and activities that would expand your gender expression.

Thank you for using the Combined Gender Identity And Transsexuality Inventory.

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hey, Bernie,

Did you notice how wide the Classifidation 4 is?

I am well up in it, but I don't see how I could just be probable!

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest ~Brenda~

Hi Sally,

Yes, I understand that the score and description is extremely wide open and vauge. I know who and what I am. This little test simply points to who I know I am in a more clinical way. I have to admit I was a little surprised to the low score considering my behavior and dress in public. Regardless, test scores do not contain me nor define me. I am free!

bernie

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Guest Naomi Stardust
Thank you.hehe... the thing is i know i need to see someone about this but im just so scared to tell her who i really am. i always try giving hints hoping she might wonder why im always watching qvc. but nothing i just sit there trembling. idk how she would take it, shes always wanted a daughter tho.

in my experience, hints like that never work

even if she suspects something, she may deny it to herself

if you want her to notice, you will probably need to take a more direct approach

having said that, i have yet to come out to my father

i know how hard it is

for a long time when i was on Laura's and my dad was in the same room sitting with his back turned, every time he would shift or get up i would panic and open a solitaire game to hide this site

then i finally figured he is going to have to find out some day so the next time, i just kept typing, he got up to go to the bathroom, walked right by, then came back, and he didn't even notice, he didn't even look at the screen!

i was SOOOO nervous!

it's kinda funny now...

anyway, these kind of hints don't seem to work, when you feel confident enough you will just have to confront her

chances are if you tell her you have something important to tell her and she sees how nervous you are

when you tell her, she may be relieved that it's nothing really bad

there are a lot of coming out tips on this site and good links, hunt around for them

good luck

Naomi

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