how comfortable are you with you?

[Guest Elyssia]

This is my 3rd counsellor so im not sure how many more to try....its possibly just me more than anything not being able to open up verbally as much as id like to, a life time of secrecy is not easy to overcome in just a few sessions

[Guest KatyDesire]

It has taken me a long time, and I still struggle a lot, but, by and large, I think I am slowly getting on top of things.

I was chatting to someone a few minutes ago, and I thought of another way to look at it:

Masculine men and feminine women tend to be a bit one-dimensional. Barbie-doll-like cardboard cut-outs.

I think we are more interesting - lots of facets to us. That lets us shine, diamond-like. Diamonds can do many things - they can cut glass and metal, or they can look wonderful in a ring. Granite is pretty boring actually; although it does make a nice strong surface in my kitchen. Solid, comforting, but I'm not going to put it in a piece of jewellery. So I am going to carry on learning to be a diamond - always shining, but often just looking different and doing different things. And never ever being the same as the old lump of granite.

Of course, to be at their best, diamonds need polishing. And that is what you are doing now with your therapist.

Hugs all round.

[Guest Kenna Dixon]

Katy...I like your diamond analogy.

At our core, each of us has a precious stone. What we must do in life - by ourselves and with the help of others - is locate that essence and enhance its value by shaping and polishing. Soon, we will learn to recognize and accept the value of what we have found and nurtured...and we'll discover that its brilliance attracts those who are drawn to beautiful things.

Looking at a diamond, who would say that all the work involved in taking it from uncut state to gem was not worthwhile?

[Guest Ellyssa]

Ellysia:

I hope you're able to open up to the therapist and get some issues resolved.

As for the diamond analogy, a diamond is interesting fresh out of the ground but it's real brilliance is only revealed after skilled hands cut and polish it to shine. Keep working on it and we're here to help with what we are able. I just heard a song on the radio by Colbie Callait, if music soothes your spirit:

"Try"

Put your make up on
Get your nails done
Curl your hair
Run the extra mile
Keep it slim
So they like you. Do they like you?

Get your sexy on
Don't be shy, girl
Take it off
This is what you want, to belong
So they like you. Do you like you?

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to give it all away
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try
You don't have to try

Oh

Get your shopping on,
At the mall,
Max your credit cards
You don't have to choose,
Buy it all
So they like you. Do they like you?

Wait a second,
Why should you care, what they think of you
When you're all alone, by yourself
Do you like you? Do you like you?

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to give it all away
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to bend until you break
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try

You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try
You don't have to try

No
Oh

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to give it all away
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try
You don't have to try

Take your make up off
Let your hair down
Take a breath
Look into the mirror, at yourself
Don't you like you?
Cause I like you

[Guest sandra6sandy9sand]

I am becoming more and more comfortable with who I am. I have been in the closet for most of my life, almost 65 years. My wife of 35 years discovered panties in my drawer a year ago and I have been trying to come out more since then. She now washes my panties with the rest of our cloths. I have a small wardrobe of women's cloths

that I ware when she is gone and many more that "pass" as men's for every day.

I accept myself for who I am and hope that my wife will continue to accept me as well. We have only once talked about cross dressing and that was nearly 20 years ago when she discovered me dressed before I went to a meeting. We did as much research as was possible then but it was nothing like what's available today.

I love myself and I love my wife. I cross dress every day in one way or another and feel fulfilled.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.

Sandra

[Guest]

moderators, if this is a duplicate of another thread, feel free to move it, not yet that well versed on everything this site offers. respectfully.,,,

I have a question for my cd sisters. How long was it before you became comfortable with yourself as a cd? I'm not meaning presentation as that seems to be a forever struggle. I mean that part of you that said, i dress and i am ok with that.

It took me many years to finally realize that this was a huge part of me and that i needed to own it and accept it. For too long, the shame and guilt of it all ruled my world. I still to this day, stay in the closet, but i can at least say to my self, 'i choose to do this and im ok with it',and I can accept this part of me. When i did that, the guilt washed away and a freedom i had not known appeared.

for me it was a gradual growth. Was it the same for you, or did you have an 'ahaa' moment?

some times i hear people talk about me and i feel proud. some days the laughter and looks are too much...

[Guest Shawna]

Hi Lily:

I'm much older and still sensitive about my Cross-dressing however the more I realize that a strangers opinion is not important to me the less I care what they think.

My dad used to say: " When they pay my bills then I'll care what they think."

My family is most important and my wife accepts me for who I am.

I have not told my adult children & their spouses yet but I believe they would also accept me as I am.

My concern would be my potential to embarrass them in the community because of many small minds.

At lease now I venture out publicly, away from my home turf, and enjoy it very much.

Baby Steps, one at a time, and feeling good about myself.

Good Luck

[Guest Lynnette Rae]

it is an uphill battle for me. I know I will get to the top when I step out of my front door dressed to the 9's. I never fully started accepting myself until about a month ago when I told my wife and she told me I needed to be me and she would help me in any way she could. since telling her we have went on several shopping trips together and you know when I am in the women's department and looking at all of the pretty clothes I will hold something up and I don't care who sees or hears me when I say how do you think this will look on me honey. I am now more at peace I no longer have the depression or feelings of guilt and think I have to go and do something manly after getting dressed up. I underdress all of the time, I purged all of my boxers. Actually I dress all of the time now my tops and jeans are women's jeans and blouses. just my slip on shoes and my cowboy boots were made for men everything else is packed away and in storage now except for a suit and one pair of jeans and shirt. I am accepting me for me and me wants to look and feel pretty.

Hugs and Kisses

[Guest Jocelyn1975]

I'm still hiding the only person that knows is my wife. I dress some 28th her but maybe one day I will stop hiding. The business in and where I live are my biggest fears of dressing outside my house. I have gradually started dressing in feminine male clothing hopefully one day we shall see