Making friends & exploring relationships

[Guest SophieT]

Hi everyone, its been quite some time since I posted here, although I stop by to read from time to time. After meeting with a gender therapist over multiple sessions, and thinking often about transitioning, and the effect it will have on those close to me (and rely on me) I've realised that its not the path for me to take for any time in the near future, perhaps never... Arriving at that decision though has done little to supress the need to dress feminine, and love as such. It is managable, but always there.

I know this resource is not an online dating resource, but I am just curious if anyone here knows a good way to meet others that could be understanding with the situation. As a single parent of two amazing tweenish-children, I am extremely cautious of the situation, and don't see an opportunity to visit places that may have a more understanding community in relatively nearby cities.

I often feel very lonely, and wonder what others have done to overcome similar situations. The area I live (and have a good career in) is very conservative. I'd love to meet a special someone, or shy of that even an understanding friend but just don't know of a way to do so. I'd be ever so grateful for any recommendations.

[VickySGV]

I very much know the problems of single dadhood. One way would be to find a support group in your area, or a short distance from it. I know groups that do babysitting pools near, but separate from the support groups and that would be an option. If you have relatives whom the kids could visit, or vice versa for a few hours that would also be an option to going to support meetings. The kids are going to grow up all too soon as I found out, but it is important to them as well for you to have personal time, otherwise it becomes "cabin fever" time which is ugly. The support group may be tiny, but most do have phone lists, and some members may be OUT enough that they can take calls at any hour.

[Guest SophieT]

I very much know the problems of single dadhood. One way would be to find a support group in your area, or a short distance from it. I know groups that do babysitting pools near, but separate from the support groups and that would be an option. If you have relatives whom the kids could visit, or vice versa for a few hours that would also be an option to going to support meetings. The kids are going to grow up all too soon as I found out, but it is important to them as well for you to have personal time, otherwise it becomes "cabin fever" time which is ugly. The support group may be tiny, but most do have phone lists, and some members may be OUT enough that they can take calls at any hour.

Vicky, thank you! I hadn't even thought about that. Unfortunately my closest relatives are near a 1k miles away, but if I found one close and it didn't last very long that might be able to work. I guess I should clarify a bit on the original post, I'm not lonely, in that the kiddos are great, and keep me always busy. Work colleages also can be good to chat with when the opportunity presents, but lonely in the sense of a companion or adult company, to talk about things of similar interest, etc..

[Guest KatyDesire]

Unless you can find TG people to mix with (there aren't any groups where I live), it is quite tough. One can't really go up to someone you have just met and say "Hi. I'm TG." That might just be a bit weird.

In any case, one would like to share other interests with people you are mixing with. My own feeling would be to join groups that have the same interests as you outside of the gender issues - bird-watching, gardening, scuba diving, or whatever. Once a relationship starts developing, one can start talking about the subject. Some will reject, but a lot of people will try to understand, and then just accept you for who you are. To me, that is the biggest win.

Good luck with whatever you try.

Hugs,

Katy

[Guest SophieT]

Unless you can find TG people to mix with (there aren't any groups where I live), it is quite tough. One can't really go up to someone you have just met and say "Hi. I'm TG." That might just be a bit weird.

Katy, I totally understand what you mean. It would be nice if there was just some easy way to meet other like minded people without all revealing self information until ready. I suppose that is the dilemma most everyone experiences until they are ready though. Thank you for the well wishes. =)