Male Hairstyle?

[Guest Lyle Englebert]

So I recently got my hair whacked off, since it caused a whole lotta dysphoria for me, but when I went to get it done, I got the wrong haircut. It's more like a bowl... And I want something different, so now that I have my bangs growing almost into my eyes my mom will take me to get my hair cut into something different... Hopefully good! I want to get it cut so I can spike it, but is there a way to ask for a more masculine haircut without blantnly asking for a man's haircut? Some tips would be great, (but I definatly want to be able to spike it.)

[Charlize]

I'm not great at hairstyles but i have found that if i'm able to be honest with my stylist just like i'm honest with my doctor they can and do keep my secret. I wear a wig and found that getting it styled to me helps a great deal. I've got to come out to my stylist for this to happen. Finding a style we like is often hard and takes time. A good hairdresser is trained to help us with finding our style.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest Clair Dufour]

Now days, its not so much how long your hair but, what you do with it. As a general rule boys comb their hair back in a pony tail or just let it hang. Girls comb it forward to cover as much of their face as possible and style it. Yes, short hair would be nice but, looking like a boy with long hair works too and keeps your mom off your back till she is more accepting. Look around school as to what others are doing with their hair and clothes. Making girl friends with short hair helps sell it to your mom. All that said, the best way to fix a bad haircut, is to cut off more. But, there have been posts here by FTM's who felt that cutting too short made them feel more like girls. But, its more than just about hair. Its about how we present ourselves overall. You want to find a stylist who can find your best look and that takes a lot of looking around and asking.

[Guest abbersthenerd]

One good way to find a more masculine or gender-neutral haircut is to just use Google images. Before I got my hair cut this last time, I googled "androgynous hairstyles", "emo hairstyles for guys", "hairstyles for guys with curly hair", and a few other things, then looked through the images to find something I liked. My hair still isn't cut the way I'd like it, because the side needs to grow out from where I'd had a shaved patch when I had long hair. I've always thought long hair looks cool, so I'm not wanting my hair too short, but anyway, I just used Google images.

My mom's friend does my hair, and I'm not out to her, so she did a girls' hairstyle this last time (I guess it's kind of like one of those pixie cuts), but hopefully next time I get it cut, it'll be more androgynous.

Before I got my hair cut, it was very long, down to my chest, and I found that if I wore a beanie or a snapback, I could tuck my hair up in it and not look as feminine as I would with the long hair. So until you can get it cut as short as you want it, maybe try wearing a hat.

[Guest Lyle Englebert]

I have a pixie cut right now, but now that it's growing out, it's starting to grow out now and looks a little more like a girl's. I use to be able to style it like a guy's, but now that it's growing out it doesn't work. It looks really feminine! And my parents won't let me come out to a hairstylist...

[Guest Alexthecat]

I have a pixie cut right now, but now that it's growing out, it's starting to grow out now and looks a little more like a girl's. I use to be able to style it like a guy's, but now that it's growing out it doesn't work. It looks really feminine! And my parents won't let me come out to a hairstylist...

Wait you're out to your parents as trans and they don't want you to get a mens cut? They need a talking to about not understanding or accepting you.

[Guest]

You don't have to "come out" to your stylist, per se, unless thats what you want. What I did was just show her a few pictures of male models on my phone and said I wanted a men's cut. Walked out looking like a gentleman! Easy peasy, no big deal. Can't see your parents disproving of just that. Besides, alot of women get masculine cuts these days- that can be something you tell your parents to nudge them onto your side.

Until then, just wear beanies and stuff. The way you describe your hair right now, sounds like you can pull it off.

[Guest OneGuy]

Yeh I agree with Rashaaad. You could tell everyone you want a change because you are bored of your hair now and just go for a short haircut. Go to your stylist and say you want a short haircut .

[Guest Purplez]

Before I came out to my hairstylist... I just showed her pictures of women with the same short hair styles but told her what I didn't like about the hairstyle (things that made it look feminine though I didn't say that)... So she gave me suggestions of what else could be done or I gave her suggestions... Believe it or not you can find some lady's hairstyles that are similar to mens... Then I just told her not to style it (no gel or any other product) for me before I left (for obvious reasons). Then I styled it myself when I got home. Good luck!!!

[JJ]

Hairstylists were the first people I came out to besides family. They have heard it all and won't care but I found no matter what I said I could not get a male looking haircut without disclosing. I was terrified at first-this is an uber conservative area even though I get my hair cut in the larger town where we shop-and I was afraid I'd end up ordered out of the salon or in a big scene. The first one just kept saying "Are you sure?" and gave me a more feminine cut than I wanted but the next place I went the girl thought it was the coolest thing she ever heard and went on and on about how thrilled she was to meet me. All the other reactions were more like "Ok". I suspect most hair stylists hear more than the average therapist.

Of course if you live in a little town privacy may be an issue.To me men's and women's hairstyles are different-even the short butch look-and mist stylists just won't really make it male without being told. Also be sure it is a stylist who also cuts men's hair because otherwise they may not know how.

Johnny

[Guest Des]

I've found that right now people are most often convinced when I have long hair but as Clair pointed out it's about styling it as a guy who has long hair would. I like my hair messy which seems to work to my favor. When I try too hard I always end up looking like a girl. Most of my guy friends put minimal thought into their hair so for years I'd just ask my girlfriend to cut it. Nothing fancy. I also rarely use any product. Not everyone's hair can do this of course and you have to find what works for you. I just shampoo without conditioner, pull it out of my face and let it air dry.

[Guest Christina200]

I would be tempted to get your hair shaved all over to say a number 2 or 3. Sinead o'Connor style. My daughter had this done and it looked really cool and she's straight!

Chrissy x

[Guest CallMeAsh]

I've spent years trying to find my haircut - makes SUCH a difference to my confidence levels. I had major issues til I found the woman who does it now in the next town, we've tweaked it every time and gotten closer, then back in January when were discussing 2 options, and I asked which was more masculine. I didn't 'come out' or anything, just asked for the more masculine. It was a good haircut, needed a couple of tweaks this time but finally managed the right haircut!!! Couldn't have done it without her =) and no out of the ordinary reaction at all.

I find when I go completely short I just look like a butch woman. I like it best so its sorta floppy on top, and short underneath. Hard to explain, and I'm very bad at it. Also my hair is crazy curly, so most styles just outright don't work on me. If it's short like I said, and I straighten it it seems to make me look the most male. When it's grown out but I haven't got time to get it cut, curly seems to go better.

I reckon a lot of this is just, trial and error really with a good hairdresser.

[Charlize]

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest Clair Dufour]

A very radical but still stealth way to deal with hair is St. Baldricks day. For those who don't know, this is where people shave their heads, to raise money for children's cancer research. When people ask, you tell them and ask if they want to donate. As it grows back slowly, you can decide where to stop or decide to stay Mr. Clean and help raise money full time. These events are all over the US, Canada, UK and other places.

Ours here is only the fourth year and the first one I get to go to live. While I no intention in donating my 69 year old long girl hair, I do plan to donate enough money to help people along and explore whatever other goals they may have. This is a brave thing to do for anyone with a female body regardless of where they are on the gender spectrum. While giving a boy a head shave is very boring stuff, giving him the chance to grow his hair out and long so he can donate it, can require as much bravery and reflection of inner self. It also gives young people an opening to talk with parents about how they see themselves anywhere on the gender spectrum.

[Guest Leigh]

This might not be a great suggestion... but do your parents own mechanical hair clippers? I always cut my hair myself or get a friend to do it. That way you can go as short as you like, and cut it shorter on the sides and back like a guys cut. Like others said, you'll probably have to experiment for a while before you find the right look for you.

peace,etc.

[Ravin]

This might not be a great suggestion... but do your parents own mechanical hair clippers? I always cut my hair myself or get a friend to do it. That way you can go as short as you like, and cut it shorter on the sides and back like a guys cut. Like others said, you'll probably have to experiment for a while before you find the right look for you.

peace,etc.

Do NOT try this if you are a perfectionist. You get what you pay for with hair cuts, in my experience. I say this less than a week after resorting to this. I was getting scruffy, and getting ma'amed, something which hadn'the happened in months.

No one has said anything except my daughter...and she IS a perfectionist.

[Guest]

I would have to draw a sketch of what I'm thinking because Google images pictures are so dorky I wouldn't be caught dead female or male looking like them. You can look them up to learn my terms anyway.

The back and side behind the ears cut in a mullet. Not too long or shaggy.

The top cut into a medium short flat top. Not a military buzz cut. Let's say 1/2-3/4" tall. Soften the tight top corners like a burr. There again not a buzz burr. Tell the barber you want hair well past military regulation length.

You can fluff it, you can spike it, it won't look female at all, but in your face! Radical male.

Go ahead, ask me how I know? Mine was a mean kick your donkey Andy Gibb look! Gimmy a break, it was the boring 80's...

Skull ear rings and snear at them too for good measure. If you really want to rub it in, ride a Harley! Sick'um Kiddo! Jody in your face Ann

[Guest Leigh]

JodyAnn, I think you just described my haircut.... >.>
yeah, Ravin is right that you can't cut your own hair if you're a perfectionist. I've messed mine up several times, but that's how I've gotten better.

the only other advice I can think of is what people always say about cutting the sideburns. Only I've never quite mastered that, so it seems weird to give that advice. and this: http://ftmguide.rassaku.net/
his advice on hair is almost the opposite of what a lot of us have said... I guess it depends on face shape too?

anyway. I hope you find something you like.

[Guest]

JodyAnn, I think you just described my haircut.... >.>

yeah, Ravin is right that you can't cut your own hair if you're a perfectionist. I've messed mine up several times, but that's how I've gotten better.

the only other advice I can think of is what people always say about cutting the sideburns. Only I've never quite mastered that, so it seems weird to give that advice. and this: http://ftmguide.rassaku.net/

his advice on hair is almost the opposite of what a lot of us have said... I guess it depends on face shape too?

anyway. I hope you find something you like.

I'd love to see your pictures.

[Guest Leigh]

JodyAnn, I am waaay to shy for that..... maybe once I get on T.

[Guest]

Ninja mask? Your hair wont be embarrassed. Giggle.