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Is anyone else here a "manly" CD?


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So I have short hair some body hair but I like to dress in short skirts and heels most (all most all) times I go out in public . I know im not passable and will never be and dont want to be...Yes I get some strange looks but it feels right, to me. But is it wrong? After all I am a man in a dress and heels. Can men not wear dresses? this keeps coming up in my life....

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So I have short hair some body hair but I like to dress in short skirts and heels most (all most all) times I go out in public . I know im not passable and will never be and dont want to be...Yes I get some strange looks but it feels right, to me. But is it wrong? After all I am a man in a dress and heels. Can men not wear dresses? this keeps coming up in my life....

I understand some people will laugh and point but am I doing wrong?

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  • Forum Moderator

I never had the courage to dress as you do. I see some at the local university who live as you describe and to me it is a sign of how much has changed for the better. If i had been caught in a skirt i might well have been expelled as a student if the others hadn't beaten me enough to send me to the hospital. Times are changing. You are not wrong but even now much of society has a great deal of problem with men cross dressing. Please be careful it can be very thin ice.

Hugs,

Charlize

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I never had the courage to dress as you do. I see some at the local university who live as you describe and to me it is a sign of how much has changed for the better. If i had been caught in a skirt i might well have been expelled as a student if the others hadn't beaten me enough to send me to the hospital. Times are changing. You are not wrong but even now much of society has a great deal of problem with men cross dressing. Please be careful it can be very thin ice.

Hugs,

Charlize

hmmm... this feeling comes on then goes lately dressing as a guy is once a week. im ready to throw away all my guy clothes. I just want to be me. A guy that likes girly things...

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  • Forum Moderator

It's your thing, do what you wanna do, I can't tell ya, who to sock it to :)

I think if more "men" did this our world would be a better place, right on, be sure to wear a smile out there. Men need to realize it's OK to be girly, it's like is'nt it about time they get over this vibe ?

Go for it !

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Guest Clair Dufour

Crossdressing with the goal of not passing is a part of the CD culture. Some do it just to be noticed and some as a political queer culture statement. That's where sex and preference are fixed but, gender and rolls are are not. While men in skirts are noticed, women dressed like men are not. This upsets people like us. While the skirt is still the sacred cow of women, it is common to see even grammar school kids dressing unisex from what ever part of the store they like and wearing their hair and such as they like. Much harder for us older folks but, even if we get a bunch of weird looks, a few good looks is worth it?

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Crossdressing with the goal of not passing is a part of the CD culture. Some do it just to be noticed and some as a political queer culture statement. That's where sex and preference are fixed but, gender and rolls are are not. While men in skirts are noticed, women dressed like men are not. This upsets people like us. While the skirt is still the sacred cow of women, it is common to see even grammar school kids dressing unisex from what ever part of the store they like and wearing their hair and such as they like. Much harder for us older folks but, even if we get a bunch of weird looks, a few good looks is worth it?

true but i look like a boy in a dress... I tried dressing moderately but I like a really girly short dress and at least 3 inch heels. some times the strange looks are more them being myself.

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  • Forum Moderator

I spend a large amount of my life dressed fully female but not to the extent of looking girly. As such I am usually taken for male, not unusually female and often do get odd looks! I don't attempt to look girly when presenting generally male as that would be a step too far for most and in my early days of dressing I did have occasions when I almost literally brought the street to a standstill. People were so shocked that their reactions were unpredictable. That seldom, if ever, happens now. If I want to be girly I go the whole way. Some see through it but are most are amused than shocked. If I am just feminine, as I said, I get some strange looks but I am usually confident enough to shrug off any adverse feedback (seldom occurs).

Tracy

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Guest Clair Dufour

Some women look like a boy in a dress too! Most women with boyish bodies have long since learned how to get a girlish look. Most wigs, pushup bras, breastforms and padded panties are bought by women not crossdresers. While you can go online to find all this stuff, the quickest and best way is to find a crossdressing shop and have them help you pick the right stuff and how to use it for your best look. There are shops in easy driving distance all along the Northeast Corridor. Some men don't have much body hair (me) and some women almost have to shave. For them and men who don't like being a fur creature there's Nair, now available in the large economy size. I posted a study way back that showed that well over 25% of men remove their body hair. When was the last time you saw a hairy star?

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Guest Eve Caillard

Hi Lexi and all

Is it wrong? Of course not! But, I dearly wish society would let men dress how they wish without the shame. I so much want to be me - go out in my favourite skirt and top, boots and jacket. But I can't, and my wife has asked me not to do that. I just feel 'right' when dressed up and I so love my clothes. I might take myself off to some of the UK's Transliving meetings that they hold in a bar / hotel booked for the occasion. Then I can dress as I want in public with like minded CDs, and have a good time to "put my hair on" or rather "let my hair down".

Sadly, I do not have the courage to dress and be out and about locally. It is not worth the hostility and all the family issues that would arise. I have not come out to our kids and I doubt I ever will, although I suspect our daughter has put two and two together.

Eve

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Guest Elyssia

Its not wrong, its just unfair that society looks at guys in the clothes associated with women as wrong or strange in some way.

Most people with a strong cis gender identity can't relate to what it feels like when you are trans in some way

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Its not wrong, its just unfair that society looks at guys in the clothes associated with women as wrong or strange in some way.

Most people with a strong cis gender identity can't relate to what it feels like when you are trans in some way

even searching on the internet it seems im the only guy who wants to be a guy, but wear a dress with boots or heels. Am I the only one?

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Guest KatyDesire

Lexi - no you're not the only one. Me too!

I have a theory - I am full of theories, mostly junk, but here, for what its worth, it is.

If you are way over on the feminine side of the scale, then, although you have a male body, you are far more comfortable looking female.

However, if, like me, you are in the middle of the gender scale, then things are a bit different. Then you still want to be male, but to present the feminine part of your persona, especially in terms of the way one dresses.

If you cast your mind back to when women started fighting to be allowed to wear trousers. There was a terrible outcry in some quarters. We had people shouting that it was the work of the devil. A few hundred years ago women could be burnt at the stake for doing such a terrible thing (think of Joan of Arc). In this country, when short shorts became popular, we even had one very prominent gentleman proclaiming that they were causing the drought at the time. (He and the drought are gone, but the shorts are still here!)

However, more to the point:

When women wear "men's" clothes, such as trousers or jackets or ties, they generally do it not to look like men, but to look like women in men's clothing.

When I wear "women's" clothing, I want to look like a man in "women's" clothing - but I want to look good while doing so. Hard to get one's head around, because we are so conditioned to think that a man in skirts is just weird. Unless you're in Scotland.

So... the other day I put it to the test. A formal black skirt, heels, and a taupe blouse. A touch of make-up to give a bit of color, hide the dark rings under my eyes, and not to make too much of the 5-o'clock shadow.

I think I really looked good. I am not going anywhere in public like that quite now, but I also felt good. It felt right. I was not trying to be anything or anyone I'm not. Whereas, unlike most other people here, when I do the whole, bra/wig thing, it feels OK, but not quite right. This was right.

So relax, you're not alone!

Hugs.

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Hi all

I am a new member, who is like minded to CD as Lexi. I will agree with all your comments as I have the same issues. I do not pass as a female in public and in the UK it is treated as queer that one dresses as a female, but as stated, women dress as men and nothing is said. So, what is wrong ?. Society is. Men are seen as macho and females are feminine. That's it. I have tested the water out there in fem clothes and like others got the, your queer look, odd ball, stairs but on the positive side, I got some good vibes from others. I tend to get away with dressing in jeans and jumper more, but, still have the fingers nails painted, a bit of eye make up, boobs and low heels on. I do not wear a wig as I have enough hair to and cut in a female shot style. I think it is more acceptable like this as it as females dress in men clothes. I do wear skirts and dresses around the house and in the garden and sleep in female wears and stick on boobs.

I will add that, the public is becoming more aware of MTF dressers, but, in saying this, society in general do not. I have just read about Capt Hannah Winterbourne who was a man in the Army and took the huge step to become a full women and remain in the Army. Good for her I say. The point here is, if the Army being a matcho society excepts this, why not all ?.

I just thank god, that I have a female partner, who fully supports me in my CD in or out and we have some good times in public.

I tend to treat those who mock with contempt, they are the odd testicles, as they do not understand us and our needs. You are what you are, just be confident out there and look the part. While out study and watch females to get tips and ideas.

Sorry I have gone on a bit, but it upsets me when others do not understand our needs as we do theirs.

Loves to all

Emma

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I also like to dress and go out in public but I'm also very aware of when and where And how I go.

Underdressing as been common for me for a very long time but now I more openly dress as many women do --but do not try to pass. I couldn't pass anyway.

First I watched how most women would dress for the occasion.

If I am at the mall or shopping in a dept store I will wear women's jeans or slacks , boots with heels, a bra with my forms & nice sweater or blouse, a feminine belt, tasteful jewelry, a comfortable jacket, my wig, and a purse. Nobody cares - occasionly some one will smile at me but most folks don't even look.

Everybody is involved in their own world.

I have worn tights, heels, skirts etc when going out if most women will be wearing the same style. I fit the occasion.

Boston, Ma is very liberal. However I still hide my CD locally. It would be an embarrassment to my children. My wife supports me and helps me with style. I often feel that I'm a bit of a coward because I will only go so far.

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Hi Shawna

I can relate to to your dilemma, regarding local areas and children it is a no go area. Having now moved away from my local area. I am not known were I currently live. I was in the local shop a month ago and a women past me, looking her up and down I knew it was a CD who goes out. I was in tight jeans low heels and a nice coat. I plucked up the guts to talk to her two weeks ago and last week we chatted in the cafe. She owned up as I did. She lives in the street across from me and a year older than I. We had a night out with our wives as a girls night out and it was great to dress full fem, make up everything. We have now met two other CD's and we are going to start a having meetings next month to exchange tips and ideas. So things are looking up for me right now.

I have lost the fear of those who do not understand, it is fab to walk out as I should be, as you. I dress to fall in with others nothing outlandish. My neighbour has shown a great deal of interest in who I am, she is 56. Off out shopping soon so I am wearing jeans, jumper (pink) heels, tights, bra and my B cup stick on boobs. Light make up, eyes mainly and a light pink lip. I do not wear a wig as my hair is already styled in a short fem style with fringe.

I think people except me more as I do not dress to stand out, blend in is the key as you say.

Hope all is well with you.

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Cheers Emmais:

So nice to hear your success story. Going out in public, dressed appropriately,(as most women currently dress) is one of my great pleasures. I don't try to pass- just be myself. Today I took a 30 minute drive to visit a plus size women's clothing store.

Very casual, 1&1/2 inch heels, no hassle, bought a new strapless bra and drove home. Just a normal trip.

Perhaps someday I'll be as fortunate as you to meet a local CD who also has a understanding wife and we can have dinner somewhere. That sounded like a great evening.

P.S. Love your great city of London. Have visited many times and have enjoyed the theater and your culture. London is changing.

Perhaps another trip in a few years.

From across the pond.

My best

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Guest Lynnette Rae

Hi everyone, this is a very interesting subject for me and one that hits close to my heart, I fully enjoy having the parts I was born with and so does my wife. I still like to do some manly things just wish I could do them dressed as the person I want to be. I dress to the hilt at home though. I hardly ever dress in mens jeans anymore when I leave the house it is usually in a very tight fitting pair of girls jeans. my wife is totally supportive of me and when we get my look dialed in we plan on having a girls night out. we have told the children my daughter loves it as she has someone to play dress up with. she is 4 years old. Dougie could care less either way he is 5. Emmitt who is 9 is having the hardest time with it. He is afraid I am going to go out and embarrass him in front of his friends or one of them will see me. it is winter right now so I get away with wearing my d cups. I will be getting breast forms soon. I am a natural c cup. my wife loves it that we share the same size bra I just have to pad my bra a little as she is a natural d cup. we love to go shopping together for clothes, shoes or makeup. we went shopping for heels yesterday at payless she bought me a nice looking pair of heels and since it was bogo there she got hers for only 10 dollars.I wanted the ones she got but I couldn't find my size:-( no matter what happens I know I love to dress girly and she does not think any less of me, my kids still think of me as dad and call me that when I dress enfemme. I wear nighties and panties to bed which she has bought me and it has not hurt our personal life one bit. in short no matter whether I dress enfemme or tone it down I am me and if the public or my family and friends don't like it that is their problem not mine. The only concern I have right now is my oldest son and he is okay with it but has not fully accepted it. everyone of my family and friends we have told so far don't have a problem with the exception of one and he asked if he could pray for me. I told him sure but only pray for me as a person and not what I like to dress like as I do not consider this a sickness but as an expression of who I am. I am me and I am proud of who I am becoming.

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Guest noeleena

Hi,

I can only relate of myself and how it feels and what its like being a female with male masculine facial features .

body shape size weight and look is pretty normal for a female and my age of 67, im fit active and on the go busy and up and at it

my clothes are normal as any woman except my reinactment garb and clothes, other wise any female could wear my clothes and would fuit nicely,

i dont pass or blend in , my many friends and those who know me well over 1500 people with in our groups dont have any issues, as im a member and on our commitees .

i could wear male or female clothes or work clothers down the road and i have done and dressed in my garb Renaissance . and people will allways say Hi noeleena as im out and about, my detail i know too many people , so from that youll see and my photo im well accepted, so clothes are not an issue or my look or lack of , it comes down to who you are and how you are accepted .

my detail is i gave my life story and about us and our family nothing hidden and this is what made the difference as to wether i was willing to open my life up to others this is why i was accepted so what im saying is its not by my clothes or how i look or my facial features are more masculine yet im doubting im as much as i think , in fact i know of other women who show more than i do and they are accepted just the same .

have a look around you to other countrys and look at thier clothes and see is there much difference between men and women you may be surprised , change western thinking back to what it was ,

...noeleena...

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