Oedipus and Electra

[Guest Promethea]

The other day I watched the first episode of Sex Change Hospital where they show a trans woman and a trans man going through some procedures associated with their transition.

What grabbed my attention was that the woman was married but her wife wasn't comfortable accompanying her, so her father, despite being an older Latino man, volunteered to be there with his daughter. They didn't say if her mother was still alive (her dad mentions they divorced years ago and his new wife is there with him), but I was moved by the support he showed for his daughter when maybe you would think he wouldn't have been likely to do it. He always gendered her correctly, waited impatiently outside of the OR, helped her during recovery, and even accepted to look at the results of her SRS with normality ("of course I want to see, I changed her diapers, so this isn't strange for me "), going as far as complimenting her about it.

That got me thinking about my own situation, and I realized the pattern of the Electra syndrome is there. I always had a better relationship with my dad. He's the one that used to spoil me. It was my mom I clashed with (and occasionally still do). My dad was and is the most understanding. While both support me in my transition he's the one that shows it more. Whenever he can be offers to drive me wherever I go, I can talk more openly with him, and he's the one correcting my mom when she misgenders me (which is a bit too often for my liking, although it is getting better).

How is/was your relationship with your parents? Has it shifted after you came out or was it always the same? I only recall it being different when I was very very young, but it may have to do with the fact that he was very absent back then (democracy had returned to our home country and he was working 16 hours a day so we could afford to move back).