My new Christmas experiment. Giggle

[Guest]

I just ordered on-line a little friendly Christmas present for myself. Two cute purple Ben Wah Orbs on sturdy retreival cord. I am concerned that the cordless ones might get stuck inside. That would be a very embarrassing doctor apointment!

Has anyone here ever tried them? Some natal women say they are fabulous pleasure, others say they are as mundane as a tampon. Why yes, I am hoping for the former result!

Oh, I am so excited! Please, please Mr Postman, hurry and make my holiday the very best ever... JodyAnn

[Guest]

testicles??? Darn word filter! I just got rid of those dang things!!!

[Guest Kaylee]

As George Takei would say... oh my!

Merry Christmas Jodyann... Merry Christmas ;P

Kaylee

[Guest]

If it makes it more palatable, we can call it my Kegal Excercise Research. Giggle.

I wonder if I can even hold them in? Merry Christmas to you too Dear. Hug. JodyAnn

[Guest KerryUK]

Oh the mind boggles Jody.

Kerry x

[Guest]

Would that be how a spinster lady can be to happy? Giggle!

Now they can't say I lost my marbles. LOL!

Happy Holidays Kerry

[VickySGV]

You might want to just look at the things for about another month until you know your swelling is completely gone or it may be that long before you can get them out even with the 200kg test retrieval cables!! I have tried toys that go buzzy buzzy, but that was at 18 months post. They are fun to try, and at that stage I did have the erotic capabilities to enjoy the fun. Be careful and enjoy the swag.

[Guest]

You may be right? I'm to a man size dilator and toy, so I'm open. But I sure would hate to get stuck. I will decide cautiously. Thanks. Happy Holidays Vicky

[Guest]

Orbs! <giggle>

Can't wait to hear the research results, JodyAnn.

Huggs,

Joann

Edited December 25, 2015 by Guest
Corrected typo. Joann60

[Guest]

I just ordered on-line a little friendly Christmas present for myself. Two cute purple Ben Wah Orbs on sturdy retreival cord. I am concerned that the cordless ones might get stuck inside. That would be a very embarrassing doctor apointment!

Has anyone here ever tried them? Some natal women say they are fabulous pleasure, others say they are as mundane as a tampon. Why yes, I am hoping for the former result!

Oh, I am so excited! Please, please Mr Postman, hurry and make my holiday the very best ever... JodyAnn

Oh Santa! The postman came today. Well that was anti climactic...

I washed the new toys in alcohol, just in case. I dilated to get nice and open. Then I inserted, that was easy enough. I got dressed in expectation.

The drum roll please......................

Ta Da! I went for a walk around the block. The result? Well I'm so far in the tampon club. Very little to no sensation "...with even the smallest movement it will drive you wild..." A fool and her money are soon departed... Well now we know.

A girlfriend stopped me on the street to wish me Merry Christmas and talk. Laughing was a nice sensation down there. That brought them down a little, I had placed them very deep. Slightly better, then I could feel something.

I took a nap out of boredom, I woke to find them safely ejected from my body.

I don't have a cat to donate them to. If anyone wants to take up a collection for me to get my eleven dollars back, use your PayPal by dialing up 1-800-DUMBLOND, oh well, never mind.

Does one have to be as big as a bowling alley down there for it to work? I may keep experimenting next year. Maybe I can get a job at the Highway Department on a road crew... I want to run the jackhammer. Giggle. Merry Christmas Dear Readers. Hug. JodyAnn

[Guest]

Does this mean your research has ended, JodyAnn? <giggle>

Huggs,

Joann

[Guest]

I'll just tuck it away for later. Giggle.

[Guest KerryUK]

Awwwww Jody, so sorry for your disappointment. It most certainly is a voyage of discovery.

Happy Holidays to you too.

Kerry x

[Guest]

Awwwww Jody, so sorry for your disappointment. It most certainly is a voyage of discovery.

Happy Holidays to you too.

Kerry x

Thanks! On to the next thing that catches my eye. Giggle.

[Guest KerryUK]

I'm waiting with bated breath Jody, you may give an idea .

Kerry x

[Guest]

Remember Dr Frankenstein? I always loved his laboratory. My toy box may look like that soon. Giggle. New faux men appendages, vacuum cup breast development. Electronic breast zappers, Jiggler messagers. I want to try all that crazy stuff.

As you may recall, my scientific goal is to experience all things female, maybe we can call these the kinky hypotheses. I'm not into anything having to do with pain. I am looking more for pleasurable as I do the mundane maintenance of dilation.

Look Ma, my second childhood is about to begin. Giggle. Well hey, why don't the other people talk about this? What's the big secret in human nature? Hug. JodyAnn

PS- Maybe I can make the boob fairy laugh too. That would show my gratitude to her. JA

[VickySGV]

Good thing you didn't sneeze when they were in there. Might have broken your foot!! Double shot gun.

[Guest]

LOL, people might question why my panties shot down to my ankles so quickly!

Maybe we could start a new post op sport; Mini Shot Put. Giggle.

[Guest Sarah1967]

JodyAnn you crack me up I love reading your posts

[Guest KerryUK]

LOL, people might question why my panties shot down to my ankles so quickly!

Maybe we could start a new post op sport; Mini Shot Put. Giggle.

Hope you did what any self respecting lady would do in that situation Jody - step calmly out of them and keep on walking:). I saw that happen once - I was gobsmacked.

Kerry x

[Guest]

LOL, people might question why my panties shot down to my ankles so quickly!

Maybe we could start a new post op sport; Mini Shot Put. Giggle.

Hope you did what any self respecting lady would do in that situation Jody - step calmly out of them and keep on walking:). I saw that happen once - I was gobsmacked.

Kerry x

See! This is why I associate wih you. I'm just naturally bawdy, but you teach me class! LOL! Hug. JodyAnn

[Guest]

Well my Hong Kong connection delivered me my next new toys. Wait for it... Wait for it... Yes, vacuum cup breast developers!

Hey! They're fun? Kind of like a three dee mammogram. I had a choice of two sizes. Naturally of coarse I chose large. Same price, what girl doesn't like to economize? Only thing is, large is kind of small. OK, for asian women, I get that. Crimonettly, small would be like trying to suck 44DDs into a Campbell soup can!

I just want to fluff out my little 44Cs a little to get soft and bouncy. That's a great big lie, I would take some big fat Ds in a New York minute! Come on Jody, at six bucks a piece? Ain't gonna happen.

I took them out of the post office, got in "Butch" my truck, peeked in the package, got a little tingle in my basement. On about my day.

Such a long day waiting. Nightfall came, I stole away with my fantasies. Boob Fairy please don't spank me for being naughty to my beloved girls.

Digging in my medicine box, I found my jar of Mother's Love nipple ointment. Hmm...healthy and slippery??? I greased the gaskets like a Bell jar so I would get a proper seal. Hmm...this would slick nicely on my breasts. A little is good...more is better.

With a little message we were all ready. "Ground control to Major Tom, take your protein pills and put your helmet(s) on..."What happened next Jody? "Houston, we have liftoff!"

With a half dozen bulb pumps they were at the top. My, that feels different?!? Hmm...kinda good too. That is the tallest they have ever stood laying on my back.

Poor things they looked like two octopus stuck upside down in gold fish bowls. This is all the rage with women in China?

Staring at each other and back at me, it seemed to us to be a little boring. The seals would leak off a little so I would give the bulbs a playful pump. Oh, that was pleasant, but I'm not willing to wait six months for an orgasm. Probably not what the inventer had in mind anyway.

Maybe I can snooze a while with my new zeppelins in jars. I gently rolled on my side, each time it broke the seal. I gave up, I tried to read and post to LP. That was a hassle hanging on to pumps and phone.

Finally we gave up. As I reinflated the atmosphere to the jars, my girls relaxed again.

I was thinking though they would make great Jell-O molds and I would get my twelve bucks worth! Hug. JodyAnn

[VickySGV]

Not to be a downer. but those things done wrong, and you have a blue, red and purple boob that is not pretty!! Good luck, you are over 21 and not under the protection of any court system. People have developed hematoma's using vacuum pumps in addition to bruising.

[Guest KerryUK]

.............but you teach me class! LOL!..........

That's because I'm one Classy Laydee - NOT. Heehee.

Big hug Jody

Kerry x

[Guest]

Not to be a downer. but those things done wrong, and you have a blue, red and purple boob that is not pretty!! Good luck, you are over 21 and not under the protection of any court system. People have developed hematoma's using vacuum pumps in addition to bruising.

Thanks Vicki, you didn't burst my bubbles. ("Young lady! You march right back upstairs to your room and take those things off!") I think you're right they don't seem too healthy.

Too much vacuum hurts. These cups are so small I might get a hicky. I really didn't get much for my twelve dollars other than I didn't spend it on junk food at McDonald's. Oh well, live and learn.

I have a girlfriend that knows me so well. If I stop talking mid sentence because something distracts me momentarily she says "Jody, did you see something shiny?" I just love her, we laugh for days! Well on to the next trinkets. Hug. JodyAnn