9 years of sobriety

[Charlize]

I'm cheating by reposting what i wrote here a year ago. All i could add however is that it is even better. The promises that i once heard about as i started my journey as a sober person are coming true and getting stronger each day.

I am truly blessed to be celebrating an anniversary. 9 years ago i stopped drinking and managed to get to a meeting of AA in an adjoining town. I hid behind a pillar in the basement that helped to support the church above and shook mostly because i was just beginning to need, really need a drink. The 12 steps and 12 traditions were displayed on the wall in front of me. I saw and knew the first step. I was powerless over alcohol and my life had become unmanageable. I still hadn't lost the farm but in many ways i had. I couldn't see beyond the need for another drink. When i fought with family it was a great excuse to go to the barn with my best friend, a gallon bottle of cheap vodka. Nothing wrong with sleeping in the cold.

At the meeting people were nice to me, especially a cute redhead ( i've spoken for her at a women's meeting she chairs).

I went back the next week. Somehow i had managed to curl up on the couch and not drink for a week! There were hallucinations but not the nice ones i had had in the 60's. The drive back to the meeting was hard as i didn't have my crutch and phantoms ran across the road in front of me.

Slowly the pain in my body went away but i still was so close to that first drink. I got a sponsor, joined the group i first attended, started to make coffee and clean up after meetings and started to pray. I knew i couldn't stay sober alone. Finding and accepting a higher power was hard for me. I had majored in religion in college with a true major in drugs. I knew all about religions and couldn't make the leap to believe without chemical assistance.

So much has changed. Not only have i accepted that i am part of a universe so much greater than any of it's elements but i am able to let go at times and trust that i will be OK even without knowing or trying to control the future. I have come to accept a higher power.

One member of my group who has known me since i joined said a few months ago: All we have to change when we get sober is everything.........just take a look at Charlize". In fact i have been blessed with change in so many ways. I am a grateful alcoholic who is also amongst other things transgendered. I am sober today thanks to my higher power and the wonderful world and its creations that surround and support me.

Hugs,

Charlize

Edited February 5, 2016 by Charlize
i changed the number 8 to 9

[Jani]

Charlize, thank you for your post and congratulations on your anniversary. While I have never struggled as you have, I do empathize with you on your journey. Please keep up the good work. Life is for living and that is what you are doing!

All my best,

Jani

[Guest]

Congratulations on your 9^th, Charlize.

Life in sobriety is wonderful.

Huggs,

Joann

[VickySGV]

Happy niners from one working up to 8 this next fall. It takes you working it to make it work!!!!!

[JJ]

Congratulations Charlize!

And thank you for all those whose lives you have enriched here because of it.

Hugs

Johnny

[Cosmo]

I'm happy for you and your life. An alcoholic can not be persuaded to stop drinking. It only happens when they are ready to stop. My dad never reached that point and our home life was miserable. I'm so glad you have been able to get rid of such a burden and enjoy life.

[Lisasimply]

Congratulations on the anniversary of Charlize! Sorry for my bad english.

I'm an alcoholic with 9 years of sobriety. A couple of years ago, began to feel the desire to depression and desire to die, I suspect that I was a woman in a male body. I very much want you to make friends and socialize.

[Charlize]

Welcome to Laura's Lisa. Your english is very good. I'm glad you have found us here.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest Raya]

Charlize, I'm late to the meeting but let me add my congratulations

I love this: "Not only have i accepted that i am part of a universe so much greater than any of it's elements but i am able to let go at times and trust that i will be OK even without knowing or trying to control the future. I have come to accept a higher power." Ahhh.

Lisa, welcome!

[Robin Silk]

so great to see you living in the moment and enjoying life as it happens. your posts have been so great for me the short time i have been on LP. having an AA TG connection has been something i never have even considered being available for me. it has been a wonderful part of my recovery (2.5 yrs). have a great day!!

[Charlize]

Tonight i will be leading the speakers meeting where i got sober and where i eventually became honest about who i am. i will be getting a 9 year coin which is always a great event for me. Another 365 24 hour periods of sobriety and even more feeling of the reality of the promises. My speaker is a trans* woman who is celebrating her 28th year of sobriety. She was a light in my sobriety and helped me early on in my transition. We worked together to start the f2f trans* meeting i've mentioned elsewhere in this forum.

It is wonderful that we can both be honest at a cis gendered group. I am truly blessed in my recovery. One day at a time, each one another miracle.

Hugs,

Charlize

[MariPosa]

Thanks so much for your strength and courage! I know if it wasn't for the strength of this way of Life I wouldn't be able to survive. It's through those things suggested that I've started coming out. You're example has helped me. Hugs and smiles!

- Mari

[Charlize]

Thank you Mari. I was going to suggest, as you are in PA that you might be close enough to come to the New Trans* Hope meeting in New Hope but then i took a closer look at your icon picture. I'm glad you are here with us at Laura's. The wisdom i've found here from so many who have gone before and who are finding a path as i write has helped me enormously. I hope you find the same.

Perhaps you will be able to meet us at 9 eastern Sundays for a meeting in the chatrooms.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Laurette]

Charlize,

Just saw this topic. Congratulations on your 9th anniversary! That is a fantastic accomplishment.

Love,

Laurette