My First Counselor Meeting with the VA

[lonelysadie]

As some one that has never come to terms with my true self, I was very hesitant to even reach out for help. I was in a very dark spot last Christmas and with the combination of my PTSD, I was heading down a road I knew would follow to my demise. With the encouragement of Kenna and some other friends, I took a leap of faith and reached out for help.

Yesterday was my first session and it was something I needed badly. She was so understanding and supportive that for the first time in my life, I felt safe and didn't have to hide anymore. She opened my eyes to the reality of who I am and what would happen if I kept the secret, a secret slowly eating away at me. I did have a moment that almost made me cry and did later in the day. I was talking about my body image and how much I hated to see it in the mirror and she said to me "Welcome to womanhood! All us girls have image issues!" While I loved the comment, it hit me hard and I sob later that night while alone in the shower. While it has been tough, at least I know I can get a support network setup and have a nice VA counselor with me the whole way. So happy to have met her! I'm more comfortable now than I have ever been and glad for it. I have joined their group sessions and will be seeing her at least twice a month, which is super nice since I can never get an appointment for anything with the VA less than 90 days out.

I'm a bit scared still and don't know where all this will lead but really excited of the fact that I might be able to finally be me. I really look forward to the day I start HRT and start seeing who I really am. : )

Sadie

[Guest Alicia Rose]

That sounds wonderful!! I'd give anything to meet someone like her.

[Guest KerryUK]

Really nice to read that you have had such an enlightening visit to your Therapist Sadie. It's such a fabulous feeling to start to get confirmation of who you are and that it is all possible. It is such a scary point in one's life where you are now and I remember it so well. But, the thing is that you have taken those first steps. Welcome to your very own and very special journey. Yes it may get a little bumpy along the way but it is an amazing thing you are now embarking on. Good for you girl.

Kerry

[jeanniesauve']

I must as,Sadie,being ex..ex military,I was never so moved as I was by a story about a,Navy Seal,who went through the same situation.

One must admire her strength and conviction.It was the game changer for me!It epitomizes the struggle we face,and the rewards for being true

to ourselves!Good and bad,Kerry's right...it is a wonderful journey!So,the name of this documentary is called,"Lady Valor",I got it on

netflix...but it probably wouldn't be to hard to recon.Once you find it,...sit back,relax and watch it without any negative people...and

see the true devotion of this woman's journey...then ask yourself if you have a choice!

love jeannie

[Charlize]

Thank you for sharing Sadie. My first visit with a GT brought tears to my eyes as well.

Being true to ourselves can be the best experience we ever have.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest Raya]

Sadie, I am so happy for you! Just to know that we are going to be OK, and people can love us for us, is so awesome.

[Guest LesleyAnne]

Glad to hear you got off that road to demise Sadie, and you're still here, getting the help you need, and that you deserve.

There is that poster in the VA waiting room that really rings true........

"It takes a warrior to ask for help"

I too had to ask for help, and to the VA's credit they started with addressing my PTSD, and then my Psych doc has really stepped up to help me with my dysphoria (not his forte, but he stepped up to the pump and started reading and learning), he has literally kept me on this planet.

So grab that lifeline and hang on, it'll get better, and better with time. Take the challenges that are going to be before you, and handle them like the Warrior you are.........

LesleyAnne

[lonelysadie]

Thanks so much to you all. I feel much better that the weight is off, figuratively and physically. : ) I'm eating better, watching every calorie, my moods are better and I'm going to go shopping for the first time with a good friend for some clothes to match what I feel inside. Excited and bit scared too, but not as much as I have been in the past.

jeanniesauve' - I've heard of the story and knew there is a book, but a movie will be nice. I'll look for it on netflix. Thanks!

[Nicole W]

Wonderful to hear such support sister good people in your neck of the woods love and hugs girl