Highschool. No Tolerance. Rumors. Hurt. Repeat.

[Guest KyleMicheal]

so, this is kind of long. I bolded the important sections.

I divided it into small sections for easier reading.

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Dad is a freemason. Mom is a Catholic. My dad hates me because I like girls. He doesn't know I'm trans. They make me go to Catholic school all my life.

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When I was a freshman, it went around school that I was suicidal. They told my mom. But I'm better now. (I still think about it, but I never really do.)

--

Everyone knows I'm bi. The trans thing, people see me as a freak. They see me as a manly woman, but that's okay. Apparently hearing fart jokes from a girl isn't normal.

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Sophomore year, people started to like me. Then, a rumor went around. People said I "used my sister as a sex toy". That's ___ing sick. People didn't like me anymore. Back to having no friends.

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Junior year, I was trying to be neutral. I couldn't talk to my boyfriend as much, because I was busy with schoolwork. What I found later? He internet cheated on me with a girl from Germany. I found out on January 3, 2009. (He did the same thing to me a few years ago. Found out on December 28, 2005.) I was depressed. I tried not to overreact. I forgave him a few weeks later. I got back with him after he broke up with her.

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February 15, 2009 I figured out he cheated. Again. With the same person. Right after I got back with him.

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I talk to this girl for a while. I like her. She liked me. We got in a relationship. (I know, stupid.) I'm still with her. Yes, I have a girlfriend.

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There is this guy. A creepy guy. He's a nerd, he's liked me from the start because I have amazing programming powers. He follows me everywhere in school. He asked me out. I told him no. And he won't leave me alone. I left him a cute little note when he left me alone.

"Thank you for the peaceful day free of conversing. I hope for more of these. I hope you find a female companion (not me).

not-so-sincerely, Steph"

I taped it in his locker. He never locks it.

--

I told creepy guy I'm trans. He keeps insulting my masculinity and calls me the "perfect girl" and I should never get the sex change. He says I don't have a mustache and that's why I'm not a boy. I'm just confused.

DAMMIT. You're not my parent. I just wanted to be friends.

--

someone left creepy guy a note. It wasn't me, but it was signed under my name. It said something about me killing myself. Now I have concerned teachers, but my mom knows I'm smarter than that. (Why would I leave a note that bluntly states that? I would be creative, if I really, really want to do that sort of thing.) So, she's going to get a copy of it.

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Why do people bring me down? Is it because I'm confident in myself? Is it because I don't hide who I am? Is it because I freely say I'm not Catholic?

Why do people do this to me? Why do they make it so no one will sit at me at lunch? Why do they make people change tables when I sit at their table?

Why can I not be me? What did I do to deserve this?

--

Well, on a happier note, here are some good things I can list about myself.

I'm smart. I can do math well, and I can program!

I am kind of artistic. I make photography and render digital art.

I do have 2 close friends. Both are internet friends, but I get to see them this summer. Yay!

I can drive all by myself now.

I never hide who I am.

I can kind of draw.

I'm versatile.

--

Well, that's it. No one will ever read this, but at least I can pretend that people care, haha.

[Guest Nekomata]

Yikes, it sounds like you're going through a lot. I thought it was cool how you handled creepy guy in such a calm and mature manner. My high school experiences were much different than yours, but they were still bad. Kids can be quite cruel and be instinct driven creatures; not knowing what they're doing until they grow up. Even so, some of them never do grow up.

[Guest Seth]

I read it.

Screw everyone that poops all over you. They have no right, and just think...they'll grow up fat, bald and ex crack heads.

[Guest Keane]

Tell the discipline department that he's harassing you.

And if your school has counselors or social workers, definitely talk to them.

Stay strong buddy.

[Guest April63]

You didn't do anything to deserve it, but stuff happens. If you make yourself stand out, there's always a chance people aren't going to like you for it. People may make fun of you, but you just have to forget them and move on.

April

[Guest DanM]

Hi Kyle,

Guess what I read it. Sorry people can be so cruel, but like the way you handled creepy. Stay strong and focused it will get you far.

[Guest Pól_Eire]

I read it, Kyle. Stay strong. Bad stuff happens, kids are mean, but you know who you are, so hold onto that. It sounds like you're handling a really tough situation with panache. Don't let them walk over you, you can handle what they're throwing at you.

Take care of yourself, brother.

Best,

Pól

[Guest OneOutOfnOne]

Where I'm from, Catholic schools are notorious for stunting social development.

Don't grow a mustache. There are so many better or more creative alternatives for facial hair.

You seem to like yourself. This is a good quality to have, hold fast to it when times are rough.

[Guest hayden_jude]

"You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life." - Winston Churchill.

Like April63 said, anytime you try to stand out you are going to encounter people who hate you and people who love you for it. I wouldn't worry about it. High school is terrible, and then it's over, this coming from someone who is finally about to graduate in a month and a half or so. It hurts, but that pain is temporary - none of these people are going with you after graduation. However, you are always going to be stuck with yourself. That's something you can't shake. You do seem to like yourself, and that's something you really have to hold onto, especially when things are bad on the outside. It's all really about your internal environment - if you are calm on the inside, it will help you to ignore what's going on outside. So if you're smart and artistic and proud of who you are, capitalize on those things. Don't ever forget them. So far, you are doing exceptionally well, dealing with the other kids at your school and with creepy. Keep that in mind as you continue to fight your battles.

Good luck, Kyle. Know that we are all hear to listen if you ever need to rant again.

Cheers,

Hayden