New to the forum, a very lost significant other.

[jac]

 

 

ht now I can only see from my perspective as he's not much of a talker and when we do talk I'm scared of upsetting him and her because I can see what courage they are having to muster up to be happy and whole. Love and light. Xx

[Dev]

Hi jac,

Welcome!  I'm glad you found us.  You're very welcome to ask any general questions you have.  Don't be afraid to be open with us about any feelings, fears, or concerns you have as well.  We know this can be a difficult road for everyone involved to travel, so you won't find anyone here to be at all judgmental.  We can also help you find ways to ask questions to your significant other, in a way that makes clear you want to understand, not to upset.

I look forward to seeing your questions and talking with you more!

[jac]

Hi Dev,

 

 

i love and desire him as a man, love him as a woman (although I am straight, or does that make me bi?). I love the character of his female persona, she is gentle and caring in ways that as a man he lacks. We have no male to female intimacy, it's always f&f and focused on her and her needs.

 

sorry, I'm at the end of my tether ?

[jac]

aaah i think i may have lost half of what i typed! If my comment doesnt make sense this,will be why.

[MaryEllen]

Hello Jac,

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

MaryEllen

[jac]

Hi MaryEllen,

 

Thank you. Sorry I totally messed up one of my posts. Somehow I managed to lose half of what I wrote! So it all sounds a bit wrong.

[MaryEllen]

Not a problem. Feel free to finish what you started.

MaryEllen

[Jani]

Hello Jac and welcome.  Not to worry about your post.  You are trying to be supportive and that is the important thing. 

Jani

[jac]

I have posted in the forum for partners. I think I need to start at the beginning, I have no idea if my partner is classed as a crossdresser or transsexual or maybe other. While he says transgender, I don't and I don't think he fully understands what that means, but it will help me to start understanding things if I know where to start ☺

[MarcieMarie12]

Think oft ransgender as the umbrella term, and it includes crossdressers as well as transwomen. There are other types of trans people such as the agender, gender fluid and such as well. 

 

Welcome to Laura's,hugs

Marcie

[Timber Wolf]

Hi Jac,

You're doing fine. Just take a deep breath and be patient. The answers will come in time. Glad you're here.

 

Lots of love,

Timber Wolf?

[Charlize]

Welcome Jac.  I'm glad you have joined us here.  Perhaps you and your partner should see a gender therapist.  Finding our way often takes time.  Maybe your partner could join us here as well.  We have had several couples as members and at least one team as moderators.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[jac]

12 hours ago, MarcieMarie12 said:

Think oft ransgender as the umbrella term, and it includes crossdressers as well as transwomen. There are other types of trans people such as the agender, gender fluid and such as well.

 

Welcome to Laura's,hugs

Marcie

Thank you Marcie,

Firstly for the hugs, I need them right now, and for the welcome

[jac]

11 hours ago, Timber Wolf said:

Hi Jac,

You're doing fine. Just take a deep breath and be patient. The answers will come in time. Glad you're here.

 

Lots of love,

Timber Wolf?

Hi Timber Wolf,

I think I am doing ok, it's hard looking to yourself for advice on something you know nothing about. I have helped my partner as much as I can on the outside and will continue, I know he's feeling lost on the inside and keeps questioning himself because he thinks he's wrong to want to be Zoe. It's only been a couple of days since I joined Laura's but already it's helping. Just knowing there's people out there that understand and take the time to reply to me.

I'm an emotional bubble at the moment and when I read replies I end up in floods of tears, I'm realising that it's,my emotions coming out as relief.

sending sincere thanks and hugs to you ?

[jac]

9 hours ago, Charlize said:

Welcome Jac.  I'm glad you have joined us here.  Perhaps you and your partner should see a gender therapist.  Finding our way often takes time.  Maybe your partner could join us here as well.  We have had several couples as members and at least one team as moderators.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Hi Charlize

Thank you for the welcome and hugs, they are very much appreciated,and needed.

I think my partner will run a mile if I suggested a therapist, he would see his actions as wrong and jump ship. Although I am totally supportive of Zoe, his female persona, I don't think he fully accepts things yet. He is perhaps as lost as me at the moment. I am looking into therapists tho but struggling to find one in my area. Until now I have negated to understand that I too am going through this and I do need to talk to someone, if only to say my words out loud.

I think it is a good idea for my partner to join Laura's, maybe that would help him to feel less alone and to understand that it's okay and there's nothing wrong with him.

Hugs back ?

[Charlize]

Simply knowing that i was not alone helped me a great deal.  At one point a mod here said:"i've got your back".  That statement somehow made a huge difference in my ability to accept myself as the person i am.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Briana]

Hi Jac and welcome to Laura's.  As you've found, it's a great place to find support, ask questions, and get help.

[Bunneh]

My gf is going through something similar. She knows Im on the way to full on trans(takes time). I don't expose her to what your partner exposes to you though. My gf says it will take time to get used to but she still wants to do everything to make this work.

[Guest]

On 1/21/2017 at 6:02 AM, jac said:

i love and desire him as a man, love him as a woman (although I am straight, or does that make me bi?). I love the character of his female persona, she is gentle and caring in ways that as a man he lacks. We have no male to female intimacy, it's always f&f and focused on her and her needs.

 

sorry, I'm at the end of my tether ?

My wife is in a similar boat, she likes men, whereas the man that resided within me has been slowing disappearing over the last couple years, and that makes her very sad. She's trying to deal with it because we love each other so very much.

What I will say is if she's only dealing with HER needs, then that's rather problematic and obviously wrong.   

[gennee]

Welcome to Laura's, Jac. It's great that you have come here and supporting your partner. Keep asking questions.