Test Drive

[Adaline]

Hey Everyone,

 

In the past, I presented female on a few occasions, mostly going to and from group, therapy, and to the women’s clinic where I get my hrt.  My wife has not been comfortable with me presenting female and has asked that I limit it to just these activities.  

 

Recently, we had a guest speaker attended our group to discuss some of the challenges of transitioning, she suggested that I ask my wife if she would be willing to do a “test drive”.  The idea is to limit the exposure in public to short periods in an enviorment we both feel comfortable in.  An example for a first time “test drive” would be going through a fast food drive through.  I put the idea to my wife and as expected she was not crazy about the idea but after a long discussion and lots of tears shed between us she agreed, as long as it was not in an area that people knew her and it was not over the top girly (no dresses, no skirts)

 

We where taking a trip for our 20th anniversary and she invited me to take some of my female attire.  On the day of the trip she said that she would be fine with me dressing in my girl jeans and best pushup bra, the shirt and shoes needed to be boy clothes. Even with this it was very evident that I was identifying female.  The trip down was fantastic, we stopped to eat, fueled and checked in all with me in girl mode.  Most importantly, my wife could see that nothing bad happened, the world didn’t stop and she didn’t come under public ridicule.  The next day we had a time share presentation to attend and I joked that we could get out faster if I went in girl mode.  She agreed, again, no dresses but this time the shirt was a nice pink short sleeve top.  The world didn’t end and very few people gave more than a second look, lots of those but more in the way being suddenly surprised than disagreeable.  BTW, the sales man was not even phased and the presentation still went an hour and a half beyond the expected 90 minutes.  When I needed to use the bathroom, I was told the women’s bathroom was around the corner but it turned out to be the family bathroom, that’s okay, this was not the time to make an issue and I had been using them on the trip down.

 

After that, we went to lunch, had our eyebrows threaded, shopped for clothes and stopped by Ulta to pickup a basic makeup kit.  One of the girls at Ulta had the best time showing me options, I’m not sure if the interest was commission driven or if they just love the challenge, either way it was fun.  

 

The next few days, I felt my wife needed a break and boy mode returned, at least for outer wear.  She started to show me how to apply the makeup and put limits on what she would be comfortable with me wearing while in boy mode and how to apply when I’m in girl mode.  During this time I only went out once in full girl mode and that was just to pickup a bottle of wine and some Chinese food we ordered, not much but I got to wear a skirt for that.

 

The return trip was full on girl mode, clothes, shoes, makeup and everything (except a dress, that ones still to much for my wife.)

 

Upon return she reminded me that she doesn’t want me to go around town in girl mode but if I’m in places where I won’t be recognized she is willing to let that slide a little.  

 

This is is a big step for my wife and it was the best anniversary gift ever.

 

I’m so excited, I needed to share the news with someone.

 

Hugs

Adaline

 

 

 

 

[Jani]

Well that was a pleasant time for you I'm sure.  This was a good approach and it seems to have gone the way you wished.  My wife saw early on that no one paid attention to me as well.  I just tried to be myself and not "act" uncomfortable or suspicious.  I understand your wife is uncomfortable about you going out locally but it seems you are winning her over a little.  

 

Cheers, Jani