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KymmieL

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Weather forecast was rain, but the sun is shining at the moment. Sunshine is precious here in the northern  California rainforest. Good day planned: coffee and a movie with DD1 and later working in studio on newest painting.  Have  wonderful to you all.

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28 minutes ago, KymmieL said:

If I truly tried I would not be around long either. It is hard saying it. I asked my wife,  would she rather have a dead husband or a  live spouse.  She responded dead husband.  That really  hurt. I am not going to kill myself to make her happy. 

 

Hugs

Kymmie 

 

Sweet zombie Jesus Kymmie, I'm sorry she said that. You deserve better. We all do.

 

Big hugs sweetie!

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Wow KymmieL

that is an awful response! My prayers will be with you. 

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45 minutes ago, KymmieL said:

If I truly tried I would not be around long either. It is hard saying it. I asked my wife,  would she rather have a dead husband or a  live spouse.  She responded dead husband.  That really  hurt. I am not going to kill myself to make her happy. 

 

Hugs

Kymmie 

Kymmie, 

 

I am now divorced and alone. I left an abuser. I guess I never thought she was when I was married to her. She held me there telling me that if I divorced her she would take everything from me. We were at the brink of bankruptcy and she told me she would rather have a divorce. If I lost the house she would divorce me. Well it happened and she was right she got everything. Even the kids for a year. She used the court to see me as a bad person and I had to fight a false restraining order. In the end I won visitation and child support. Life isn’t fair and life isn’t easy but we have to stay and live it out. 

 

My ex knew I was putting her clothes on when she was gone. I missed her so much. She would work the graveyard shift. She accused me of being the emotional person and told me I was the woman in our relationship. I knew the cost of leaving. I paid the price. Now I’m alone, no money, but I’m still here. 
 

I’m sorry your wife doesn’t understand you. I can’t tell you what to do Honey. What I can say is you have to protect yourself. You can’t let anyone tell you your feelings don’t matter. Don’t let someone else dictate who you are. I did that and I lived in pain 13 years! I was told what I could wear, who I could see, she even made me call her sweet heart. I did all this because I thought it was love. Now that I’m alone I see that it wasn’t love that we had it was just an arrangement. For years she ignored me and I would rather be able to be myself than be someone’s property. It’s better to live alone than live in strive and fear. 

 

Never think your life isn’t worth it because everyone goes through hard times Babe. I hope you and your spouse can work this out. I’m here for you. 
 

Love 

 

Tessa❤️ Hugs

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59 minutes ago, KymmieL said:

If I truly tried I would not be around long either. It is hard saying it. I asked my wife,  would she rather have a dead husband or a  live spouse.  She responded dead husband.  That really  hurt. I am not going to kill myself to make her happy. 

 

Hugs

Kymmie 

I’m very sorry she said that it’s is very sad she can’t see the light. I hope it gets better for you were all here for you.

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Good morning beautiful Peoples!  Got the coffee brewing, some breakfast meats thawing and trying to get the gumption to face the day.  Got a new blend from Black Rifle Coffee we are trying this morning called Caffeine and Hate LOL.  Not much on the list for today just cleaning and maybe working on an outline for a story idea I had.  Raining today so definitely glad I finished the yard last night

 

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46 minutes ago, JustineM said:

Good morning beautiful Peoples!  Got the coffee brewing, some breakfast meats thawing and trying to get the gumption to face the day.  Got a new blend from Black Rifle Coffee we are trying this morning called Caffeine and Hate LOL.  Not much on the list for today just cleaning and maybe working on an outline for a story idea I had.  Raining today so definitely glad I finished the yard last night

 

You write! Do do I. I haven’t been lately though. I write my stories on Chapters App. Currently doing My Crush. My main character “Tessa” is in the hospital fighting for her life! I don’t know if I’m going to take her out or not. She has two loves! Victor-CEO but he sold everything to be with her and then Roger. The story is Victor took her to a private Island and told her he was in trouble and that he faked their deaths and that Tessa was now to stay with him. It’s actually a game he plays with woman but he really did fall in love with Tessa. Tessa seeing she’s trapped walks out into the Ocean but is found by Roger a fisherman. She gets amnesia and she tells Roger and his friend George she doesn’t want to go back to her old life. Tessa falls in love with Roger and he sneaks her to the Island not knowing Victor owned it...I’ll stop there. If you have an iPhone download chapters and look for “My Crush” I go by Tessa on the app.Ive written tons of stories! I have about 6 on this app. 
 

Girl Without An Umbrella

Chick With A Click 

Winter’s Grove

Deadly Secrets 

Christmas Puppy

My Crush

 

What do you write?
 

Tess 

 

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37 minutes ago, Tessa said:

You write! Do do I. I haven’t been lately though. I write my stories on Chapters App. Currently doing My Crush. My main character “Tessa” is in the hospital fighting for her life! I don’t know if I’m going to take her out or not. She has two loves! Victor-CEO but he sold everything to be with her and then Roger. The story is Victor took her to a private Island and told her he was in trouble and that he faked their deaths and that Tessa was now to stay with him. It’s actually a game he plays with woman but he really did fall in love with Tessa. Tessa seeing she’s trapped walks out into the Ocean but is found by Roger a fisherman. She gets amnesia and she tells Roger and his friend George she doesn’t want to go back to her old life. Tessa falls in love with Roger and he sneaks her to the Island not knowing Victor owned it...I’ll stop there. If you have an iPhone download chapters and look for “My Crush” I go by Tessa on the app.Ive written tons of stories! I have about 6 on this app. 
 

Girl Without An Umbrella

Chick With A Click 

Winter’s Grove

Deadly Secrets 

Christmas Puppy

My Crush

 

What do you write?
 

Tess 

 

I've been trying to get into it.  I've had a couple attempts that fell rather flat, going to try again with a little more organization this time.  Most of my ideas are Sci-Fi, mainly Star Wars (yes I am a nerd :) ) Current idea is a Star Wars based story about Imperial Advanced Flight training.  Kind of a play along the X-wing series but from the Imperial standpoint.  

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9 hours ago, ShawnaLeigh said:

It’s not a choice.  It’s who you were born to be. 
The only choice we have is to hide. Or not.  
Seriously, what kind of a choice is that?  To not be your true self for the sake or others?!?!

Since Shawna is my BFF, (and because she's absolutely right) I have to side with her on this one. It's not a choice. I chose to ignore it for decades hoping it would go away. But it doesn't. It comes back a little stronger each time. Finally, following catastrophe after catastrophe, I decided thats it. I've fulfilled all my responsibilities so now it's Patti time. All of the things I've dealt with so far, all the fears I've experienced that turned out to be red herrings, SL called it right every time. So I'm sure I did the right thing and my only regret was waiting so long.

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Nothing really exciting today it was raining most of the day. My wife and I ran out to get dog food. Then we had Chinese takeout and went to target and I got to do a little clothes shopping. I got a pair of jeans, 2 t shirts and 2 bras. The bras I found out can be used as a strapless bra which had me excited because I have a few tops that it is hard to hide my bra straps and now I don’t have to worry about them, and the were a good price to. Most of my bras are from Victoria secret because they are about the only ones in my size that have a lot of padding to help the girls out lol. So I was happy when I found some at target.

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8 hours ago, JustineM said:

I've been trying to get into it.  I've had a couple attempts that fell rather flat, going to try again with a little more organization this time.  Most of my ideas are Sci-Fi, mainly Star Wars (yes I am a nerd :) ) Current idea is a Star Wars based story about Imperial Advanced Flight training.  Kind of a play along the X-wing series but from the Imperial standpoint.  

My deadly secrets is a little Sci Fi I guess. I love Star Wars! I have all the movies but the newest one! I have an authentic replica of a light saver! I’ll binge on Star Wars! Do you write for fun or are you trying to get published? I tried once but it’s costly. Maybe someday. Thanks for sharing! 
 

Tessa

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3 hours ago, Emily michelle said:

Nothing really exciting today it was raining most of the day. My wife and I ran out to get dog food. Then we had Chinese takeout and went to target and I got to do a little clothes shopping. I got a pair of jeans, 2 t shirts and 2 bras. The bras I found out can be used as a strapless bra which had me excited because I have a few tops that it is hard to hide my bra straps and now I don’t have to worry about them, and the were a good price to. Most of my bras are from Victoria secret because they are about the only ones in my size that have a lot of padding to help the girls out lol. So I was happy when I found some at target.

Those sound like awesome bras Emily Michelle.  What was that style called at Target?

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Looks like we have a few writers here.I write as well. I post mine on Bigcloset/topshelf.  under my name.

 

Just about all of mine have transgender as a subject.

 

Well today let me see what I did. Worked on putting the new header panel on the Grand marquis. Helped take apart the wife's town car. finally got the correct grips for the bike and put on. Then swapped the tires off the town car.

 

I have noticed something that I seem to be doing more often. I am always thinking about being me, being female.

 

Kymmie

 

 

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Good Morning! I had awful dreams, can't get moving. Need more coffee and get ready for work. I hope everyone has a good day!

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5 hours ago, Ms Maddie said:

Those sound like awesome bras Emily Michelle.  What was that style called at Target?

One was from maidenform and it’s a push-up with 5 ways to wear. The other one was from Auden with 5 ways to wear for the money I couldn’t pass them up 

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6 hours ago, KymmieL said:

Looks like we have a few writers here.I write as well. I post mine on Bigcloset/topshelf.  under my name.

 

Just about all of mine have transgender as a subject.

 

Well today let me see what I did. Worked on putting the new header panel on the Grand marquis. Helped take apart the wife's town car. finally got the correct grips for the bike and put on. Then swapped the tires off the town car.

 

I have noticed something that I seem to be doing more often. I am always thinking about being me, being female.

 

Kymmie

 

 

I will check out your writing. You sound like a great person doing things for your wife! When I was married I would clear off the snow and gas up my wives car. I loved her so much! I would also make sure everyday to try to kiss her and tell her I love you. Those were the good days before the great sadness came (When she chose to love her career more than me) After having 3 children she never got to finish college to be a nurse. We got married. I let her go back and took all the responsibilities of a mother. I loved it! She graduated! Little did I know she was saving money up on the side and waiting to get rid of me. All affection left and I was reduced to a babysitter in fact that’s what she told me I was. Living with no love and effection already four the the years she was in college. We lasted a year after that and I tried my best to fix it. She told me I was a terrorist in front of my children. Why? Then came the long nights and she stopped wearing her wedding ring. She would talk about being loved by another. She refused dates and she would put me down in front of my children. One day she had the kids and her list off everything bad about me. I was crushed and that pretty much sealed my injury. No sex for years, no affection at all, being put down all the time and then told if I try to do anything she would take the kids and never come back. Refused counseling. She found her way out and so did I. Only I never expected it to be this hard. She took my babies for a year. There older now and know the truth but reduced to visits. 
 

The more I share this the more I know it’s a pain I’m still dealing with. I was divorced in 2014 but everyday is a struggle. 
 

Tessa

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OMG this is so a Monday!

I just locked myself out of my own office.  I had to run upstairs to use the rest room and when I came back down I had no security badge, no key and my phone as well.  All sitting on my desk.

 

I had to wait about 30 minutes for someone to come along and let me in the level I work on.  Sigh.

Let the week begin right?  LOL

 

 

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8 hours ago, Ms Maddie said:

Those sound like awesome bras Emily Michelle.  What was that style called at Target?

Hi Maddie and @Emily michelle - wrt to bras
I just recently FINALLY found a bra that I can wear with my (A-minus size) natural boobs.  The brand was Glamorise Full Figure Padded style #3010.  Ordered it online at Amazon.  My size was 42A. 
I can hardly ever find 42A and the ones I've tried before never fit well.  Too narrow in the chest.
It was wider between the cups than other womens bras I've tried, so fit my chest better and cupped underneath in the right place.  And the ample push-up gave me a natural shape and fullness above the bra line.  Pretty pink flowered pattern and very, very comfortable.  Looks great under my clothes.

Just thought I would share ?
 

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54 minutes ago, ShawnaLeigh said:

OMG this is so a Monday!

I just locked myself out of my own office.  I had to run upstairs to use the rest room and when I came back down I had no security badge, no key and my phone as well.  All sitting on my desk.

 

I had to wait about 30 minutes for someone to come along and let me in the level I work on.  Sigh.

Let the week begin right?  LOL

 

 

Great way to start the week!  At least you’re getting to the office

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  • Forum Moderator

What rocket scientist puts a 14' gutter on a 16' roof?  Whoever build this house, that's who.  So yesterday, I spent several hours replacing siding boards rotted out by the splashing from the missing gutter sections.  Today's mission is to extend the gutters.  Oh well, it's not like I have anywhere to go to.

 

Have a good day, everyone!

 

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Stormy monday

Been raining steady with winds.  The yard behind my apartment building is looking like a big pond. 

Thank you Emily Michelle and KayC for the bra info! Not looking to invest much, but can use one soon that can hide the straps like that.

 

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Good afternoon everyone,

 

On the lighter side of things. I started growing my hair out at the request of a young cancer victim. My last hair cut was a high and tight buzz, in September 2018. Now my hair is past my shoulders, and in guy mode a low ponytail or loose tail through the hat band is how I wear it for professional contact. I've learned that constant ponytails damage the hair and whenever possible I wear soft hair scrunchies, or leave it down to blow in the wind. My hair is silver grey, curly, and fine. During the winter months a biker style elastic band/ear cover was gender neutral. Now that it's late Spring these strechy bands are okay, my sun glasses pushed back on my head achieves a good results for out in public, however I'm wondering about overcast days or after dark. Today is overcast and rainy so I have my shop safety glasses pushed back on my head. My safety glasses are also readers, and this morning my business partner (Type A former Cop) looked at me sitting in my cubicle the safety glasses being used as a headband and readers riding low on my nose as I typed on the computer. Tilted his head and questioned my need for two sets of glasses on my head. What I really wanted to do this morning while fixing my hair was to wear one of my wife's cute plastic headbands. Have I overlooked guy mode headbands somewhere or am I stuck with Sun/Safety glasses?

 

Love you all, lets laugh together and grow

 

Mmindy

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