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Good morning All. Coffees on.


KymmieL

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12 hours ago, ShawnaLeigh said:

I am trying to stay focused and stay busy because if I start to think about all I am leaving behind in VT I will break down crying.

 

I've been thinking to myself that this will be a painful goodbye for you. Saying goodbye to A is going to be more difficult than you think. She's been a good friend. Same with E and the other kids. I'll be there beside you, probably crying as well. They are all welcome in our Oregon house 24/7/365. Like the Wizard of Oz said to the cowardly Lion when giving him a heart at the end of the movie:

 

"Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable".

 

12 hours ago, ShawnaLeigh said:

Its going to be hard I know.  But Patti Anne will be with me to hold my hand, be there for me in silence if need be, and share with me my last moments with my family and friends.  

 

I'll be there. Maybe not in total silence, but I will be there with/for you

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Morning everyone.

Today starts the last week of myself having to do college work for almost two months. Back in February, I had pneumonia, which took 3 weeks to bounce back from. As a result, I missed allot of classes, but because my professors are great people, I received incompletes in my courses, which gave me an extra 6 weeks to complete the stuff I'm missing.  I'm mostly just tying up loose ends- finishing several essays and then I'll finally be done with this crazy spring semester. 

 

 

 

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30 minutes ago, Patti Anne said:

 

I've been thinking to myself that this will be a painful goodbye for you. Saying goodbye to A is going to be more difficult than you think. She's been a good friend. Same with E and the other kids. I'll be there beside you, probably crying as well. They are all welcome in our Oregon house 24/7/365. Like the Wizard of Oz said to the cowardly Lion when giving him a heart at the end of the movie:

 

"Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable".

 

 

I'll be there. Maybe not in total silence, but I will be there with/for you

Thank you honey.  I knew you would be.  

It will be hard for sure but focusing on the new life will be the best medicine. 

 

Today back to work.  

More clean up from the last 2 weeks in emails and documentation.

I swear the guys who covered for me did absolutely nothing on the inspections list.  Oh well they will be sorry as I found out one of them will be taking over this account for a while and he had plenty of time to do these inspections. Now he is going to be way behind.  LOL

 

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33 minutes ago, ShawnaLeigh said:

Thank you honey.  I knew you would be.  

It will be hard for sure but focusing on the new life will be the best medicine. 

 

Today back to work.  

More clean up from the last 2 weeks in emails and documentation.

I swear the guys who covered for me did absolutely nothing on the inspections list.  Oh well they will be sorry as I found out one of them will be taking over this account for a while and he had plenty of time to do these inspections. Now he is going to be way behind.  LOL

 

I know what you mean about others not getting anything done. I took Friday and Saturday off and now I’m completely swamped. Friday I made the mistake of not turning my phone off and they were already calling before 6am. It’s a lot better than being unemployed though.

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Shawna,  you are going to be fine in the  end. Just think of your new job, home, and best of all. Patti Ann. It was hard when I  moved from Rapid City to Laramie,  over twenty years ago. 

Surprisingly,  no crap from my wife.  I could tell she was in a mood.  I didn't  ask her, I would have been told  I'm  just tired.  

Kymmie 

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Just happened to notice that, with over 104,000 visits (since 9/2018), and now approaching 4000 posts, the "Coffees on" topic is the most visited, most active topic in this entire forum, hands down :)

 

The coffee tastes great this morning on my 2nd mug, just at work now, but have a little time to post here. It's a sunny cool morning here, going up to perhaps mid 60's later.

 

Have a great day all

 

C

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On 6/7/2020 at 6:52 AM, MikaReich said:

I watched a youtube video on Heidi Phox's channel and realized what I did wrong.

That was a great video, Mika.  Thank you for sharing❣️

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3 hours ago, Tessa said:

It’s been a while since I posted.

That's great news, Tess!  Happy things seem to be moving in the right direction.

Thanks for the update and nice to hear from you again❣️

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16 hours ago, Willow said:

I feel bad that so many friends here are having bad weekends and spouse issues.  I will say that I’ve been there too.

Good morning Willow, and everyone else enjoying the coffee.

 

To say my weekend started off bad is a major understatement. So my coming out Thursday evening was a nightmarish explosion of rage from my Suzie (wife). After screaming at me and calling me every bad name in the book, stopping just short of the Antichrist. She immediately bolted from the houses outing me as trans to my daughter, and when that didn't go the way she wanted. She went to my son's home and outed me to him and his wife. (both very religious) They help to pump up her rage and hate for my confessing of my deepest secrets. Friday wasn't any better. Saturday not much better but civil. Sunday had it's moments but was mostly civil and we even went on a bicycle fitness ride. She wants me to purge myself from all Transgender twitter accounts and connections. NOT GOING TO HAPPEN! Later Sunday she googled "When your husband comes out as Transgender" The more she read the more she cried, the softer her tone with me became. It's still not good but it's better.

 

Love and hugs for all of you and thank you for being here.

 

Mindy?????   

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Tentative fingers crossed for you @Mmindy. If she's researching the situation, it could mean that she cares enough to help you through it. Hopefully it's the good kind of help you through it. Good luck sweetie!

 

Hugs!

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Yeah, my fingers crossed as well. Mindy. 

I am in the same boat my wife doesn't  accept me as becoming female  at all, period end of story.  She says she doesn't understand.  As we all know that is impossible to explain. 

 

Kymmie

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@Mmindy I am so sorry you had to go through that. I’m expecting something similar in my situation once l come out to my wife again. For years I’ve been binging and purging my transition wishes and the wife wants it gone. 
 

Good news is your wife is talking to you and seems to be starting to grasp that this is a part of you that’s not going away and hopefully she will grow to accept it. *hugs*
 

Best wishes,

Katie J. 

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2 hours ago, Mmindy said:

She wants me to purge myself from all Transgender twitter accounts and connections.


You probably know this... She will have to go through the stages of grief/change.  It may seem like anger lashing out but stage one is denial.  "This isn't happening to me!"  "Kids, can you believe what he's doing to me?!"  "I have to put a stop to this." "You have to stop this."  It seems selfish but it's a necessary stage of the process.  Telling you to change/fix yourself is one tactic of the process, but know that even if you did, in the end she would realize that is not the solution.

 

Hang on for dear life while she processes.  It will take a while and she might repeat some stages.  It's simply the normal process of the mind trying to re-establish stability and familiarity.  She has no control over it.  No one, including her, can know where she'll arrive in the end or how long that will take.

 

My ex, in her outburst of denial, immediately outed me to our foster daughter.  Sadly, that was the last time she (daughter) ever spoke to me.

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Hi it’s Monday!  No coffee today.  I had an early doctors appointment.  I am healthy!  
 

both my doctor and his nurse expressed how much trouble I was clearly in from the wasp sting.   I now have a prescription for an epipen kit. 
 

From the doctor I went to the hospital to get blood work for my endocrinologist.  Bad idea.  I sat there for 2hours waiting my turn.  
 

I hope you all have a better week this week.  Coming out is important but can be very traumatic.

 

Willow

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Thank you everyone, I'm keeping faith that time is on my side and this really is a grief process. I told her that my Twitter account has me following 9k+ with 12.2k followers and I'm not culling my list of any #LGBTQ community members, that's ridiculous. I'm not hiding anything from her or my therapist. I'm still the same person she has always known minus this one secret. Now she knows me and this hidden dimension revealing the whole me.

 

Love you all, 

 

Mindy???????

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Well all, the wife encouraged me to post my

manicure photos in one of the groups on Facebook where they share “Nailfies”. I’m accidentally very popular all of a sudden. Which means.....

 

WIFE HAS APPROVED PAINTED NAILS FOR GOOD!

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39 minutes ago, KathrynnCox said:

WIFE HAS APPROVED PAINTED NAILS FOR GOOD!

Yay!  Happy to hear it!

It has been very busy, lately.  On Friday, my wife officially went from being Mrs  L to being Doctor L!  She also has accepted a position at NIH, so we will be moving halfway across the country in three months.  Now we need to prep the house for sale... Fun times!

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40 minutes ago, MetaLicious said:

She also has accepted a position at NIH, so we will be moving halfway across the country in three months.  Now we need to prep the house for sale... Fun times!


My wife used to work at NIH!!

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Decided to come out more last night,came out as gender fluid.It was great and accepted very well by my girlfriend,parents and my sisters.It included my daughters as well.Been telling my customers there will be changes with me too,coming around as Mika on certain days starting in a week or so.It has been great so far.My sisters are going to like it and seen I am much happier since I came out about this.

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9 hours ago, MetaLicious said:

Yay!  Happy to hear it!

It has been very busy, lately.  On Friday, my wife officially went from being Mrs  L to being Doctor L!  She also has accepted a position at NIH, so we will be moving halfway across the country in three months.  Now we need to prep the house for sale... Fun times!

Congrats!  I know the stress of a big move that far. I'm in packing mode right now.  Though avoided the whole selling of the house stresses.  That's no fun.  OMG I hates trying to sell one house and buy another.  So stressful.

 

1 hour ago, MikaReich said:

Decided to come out more last night,came out as gender fluid.It was great and accepted very well by my girlfriend,parents and my sisters.It included my daughters as well.Been telling my customers there will be changes with me too,coming around as Mika on certain days starting in a week or so.It has been great so far.My sisters are going to like it and seen I am much happier since I came out about this.

This is fantastic news.  Congrats.

Coming out is such a hard venture but once you do its an amazing feeling of freedom and a huge load of your soul.  Being your true self is simply amazing to me.

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2 hours ago, MikaReich said:

Decided to come out more last night,came out as gender fluid

Congrats Mika, It’s nice that you can be open like this and share with others you care about....just who you are. I bet the reception to your news went well. From what you’ve posted in the past, they all seem like very affirming folk.

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9 hours ago, MetaLicious said:

On Friday, my wife officially went from being Mrs  L to being Doctor L! 

Wow, that is quite the accomplishment @MetaLicious I hope you two have the opportunity soon the celebrate in a proper way despite the lockdown. She deserves it and I know your support of her education probably helped her a lot too. Kudos to you and your wife!

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Good morning 

 

@MetaLicious congratulations on your wife’s new position and your move to the Washington metro area.  I’ve been to the NIH hospital grounds, it’s quite amazing.  Do be careful where you choose to live. A matter of blocks can make a huge difference in your personal safety.  If you can afford it DuPont circle would be a good choice for you.  Montgomery county would be good for her.  SE DC and PG county should be avoided. (I lived and worked in the area for over 20 years my in-laws for way more than that.)

 

Willow

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    • Nonexistent
      I have the same problem as you, my face is the main reason why I get misgendered I'm pretty sure. I think it's mostly up to genetics how your face will look (T can help, but still genetics will determine how you end up). You can't change your facial structure really, you can get facial masculinization surgery but it's expensive so not an option for most unless you're rich lol.    Experimentally (I haven't done it but want to), you could see if any plastic surgeons around you will give you Kybella in your cheeks. It is an injection that removes fat, and is usually used underneath the chin/on the neck below the jawline, but some may use it off-label on the face. The only potential problem with this is that if your face would naturally thin out at an older age, it could thin out extra and make you look older (though I'm not certain on this). Another option is to get filler in your jaw/chin, which would make your jawline look more square and your face more masculine. I want jaw filler but I'm poor lol, it only lasts one year up to a few years depending on what kind you get, so it would have to be done every so often and can get expensive. I did get chin filler once, only 2 small vials so it didn't make that big of a difference. I would recommend going for the jaw if you can only choose 1, I wish I had done that.   Those are the only options I know of that will bring legitimate noticeable changes.
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      Welcome to the forums, Blake!! We are happy that you found us!!
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      Good evening Blake.   Welcome to Transgender Pulse Forums.   Best wishes, stay positive and motivated.   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
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      Thank you.    Trans men and trans women each have their own struggles for sure, but I agree, it can be a hard time to be a non-passing trans guy. There is no specific "man clothes" that only men wear. People could just think I'm butch (which sucks to think about, if people think I'm a lesbian when I'm a dude!!). I mean I would feel better if I got gendered correctly even if I don't fully pass, it would maybe raise my confidence to think maybe I do pass well lol! Instead I'm just reminded I don't.   Though I may just focus on the times I don't pass and ignore the times that I do. Because I rarely remember getting gendered correctly, but I hone in on the times that I don't. 
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      Going to the conventions has been one of my ways to deal with this stuff. 
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      Sorry it took me a while to respond!    I would like to get to know you. :) I only have mental disabilities. Schizoaffective disorder, depression, and anxiety. The last two are severe and very treatment-resistant. I did have physical problems for some time, but it was caused by an antipsychotic medication (Invega). It basically crippled me, muscle weakness/fatigue, basically could barely walk (used mobility devices) and doctors were useless since they didn't suspect the medication I was on! I've finally ditched antipsychotics (hopefully for good, unless my symptoms come back). I usually don't share like this, especially in person, but hey, I'm anonymous. :)   I'm not expecting reciprocation at all btw, these things are personal. There is more to us than disabilities, so tell me about yourself if you still wanna talk!
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    • Ashley0616
      @KymmieLWOW! He is absolutely horrible! Definitely one of the worst boss's. 
    • KymmieL
      Well the boss is at it again. They misplaced a work order thinking I was the last one who had it, yesterday morning. I know where it is. Last thing I did with it was put it back on the counter. He accused me a couple times of having it last and put it somewhere. Come to find out, the other boss (his wife) had taken it. she put the work order paper in the recycle box.   Has he apologized about the accusations. He!! no. I am waiting for hadies to get frost bit.   So that was my morning.  But it is finally warming up here. currently 63 and windy.   Hugs, Kymmie
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