Good morning All. Coffees on.

[Jackie C.]

2 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

Most items are under $20 so i am going to need a bigger closet.

 

Doesn't matter how big your closet is: You need a bigger closet.

 

You look happy in that picture Bri! I'm glad! Need to know how that dress fits with your new profile though. I'm betting you're rocking it even harder.

 

Hugs!

[Bri2020]

1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

 

Doesn't matter how big your closet is: You need a bigger closet.

 

You look happy in that picture Bri! I'm glad! Need to know how that dress fits with your new profile though. I'm betting you're rocking it even harder.

 

Hugs!

I have to admit, I tried it on and it makes me nervous about popping out of it. I may need a little tape. lol  Maybe I will wear it tomorrow and post in the other thread.

[Vidanjali]

Thanks @Jamie68. Likewise, I'm glad your spouse is helping you! 

[Jamie68]

5 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

Jamie have you used this in other areas with any success?

No. This is the first time trying with patches. 

[Jamie68]

4 hours ago, Vidanjali said:

Thanks @Jamie68. Likewise, I'm glad your spouse is helping you! 

Thanks ?

[KymmieL]

Well my wife is saying I am changing inside. At times I sound like a girl on her monthly visitor. (should I be happy) She still does understand and has been trying to accept the things she cannot change. She could accept me as a crossdresser but not as a woman. I feel that her love for me is dwindling. While my love for her is as strong as ever. I might as well start looking to move.  Hey Bri, would you need a receptionist?

 

My oldest doesn't seem to want anything to do with me. He won't go to a car show, because that is what he and dad did. and I am not dad to him anymore.

 

I am still working up the courage to tell my mom. I don't know what I will do if she rejects me like my son did. Probably shoot myself.

My world is falling apart and it is all my fault.

 

Kymmie

[Bri2020]

1 hour ago, KymmieL said:

Well my wife is saying I am changing inside. At times I sound like a girl on her monthly visitor. (should I be happy) She still does understand and has been trying to accept the things she cannot change. She could accept me as a crossdresser but not as a woman. I feel that her love for me is dwindling. While my love for her is as strong as ever. I might as well start looking to move.  Hey Bri, would you need a receptionist?

 

My oldest doesn't seem to want anything to do with me. He won't go to a car show, because that is what he and dad did. and I am not dad to him anymore.

 

I am still working up the courage to tell my mom. I don't know what I will do if she rejects me like my son did. Probably shoot myself.

My world is falling apart and it is all my fault.

 

Kymmie

It's not your fault. I know how you feel- i was there a couple weeks ago but you can't change who you are or how people treat you. You can only be you, and choose how you will treat them.  Hang in there.  Call your therapist tomorrow if you can, or a friend.  I'm sorry you are dealing with all of this.

Hugs

Bri

 

 

[Elizabeth Star]

 I had scheduled the day off from work today due to my partner having a medical appointment. The appointment was cancelled last minute so I was free for the day.

 

I took it upon myself to get the name changed on my vaccination card. The last thing I want to do is out myself if I ever have to show it to get in somewhere. The downside is it was a 45 minute drive just to get to the place to get a new card. They were really cool about it, didn't ask any questions or even look at me funny and I was done and on my way home in less than 10 minutes.

 

Not having much to do I though to go visit one of my partner's friends. She had told me that her friends are my friends so....  My partner was having a rough day medically and was planning to spend it in bed. I figured I was going out alone so I wanted to look nice. I wore my new green dress, it looks really nice with my black heeled boots. Out the door I went. Shortly after I got there my partner showed up. Guess she needed to get out of the house too. I don't think she realized how I was dressed when I left and made some comment (I didn't hear) to her friend about it. Her friend so awesome, I heard her reply but doesn't she look so good in it? My partner just said yea but it's hard to get used to seeing him in a dress. The misgendering bothers me but I'm trying to be an adult about it and didn't say anything. We still stayed for over 4 hours.

 

While we were there my partner had too much fun and I needed to driver her home. This was the first time we rode together with me in a dress and it was normal. I expected to hear some backlash for it but it never happened. I really need her to get adjusted to it. Especially with our vacation at the end of the month. There's no way I spending 4 nights away from home wearing nothing but jeans and t-shirts.

 

Making progress.

 

 

 

 

[Heather Nicole]

2 hours ago, KymmieL said:

My oldest doesn't seem to want anything to do with me. He won't go to a car show, because that is what he and dad did. and I am not dad to him anymore.

 

Sorry to hear you're still stuggling there. Maybe it'll just take time and/or space with him. Hopefully, he'll eventually realize that he has a choice: Live his life choosing to keep his dad out of it entirely, or have a relationship with the same person his dad is even if it comes with a change your son didn't want. Maybe he can't have the "all" he wants, but perhaps he'll gradually learn he doesn't have to choose "nothing".

[Heather Nicole]

@Elizabeth Star I'm glad for your progress! One step at a time... 

[Elizabeth Star]

1 hour ago, Lexa83 said:

Just spent the last week and half in almost pure silence because my spouse visited me on-site where I was working and I had mascara on as I've been applying light makeup when not around her to help myself feel better. This pushed a last nerve and prior to yesterday she was kicking me out as she couldn't see a future with me. I admitted that I cannot continue being just partially out and if she can't stand who I'm starting to let out I don't see any other choice for us either. she spent the next day crying I guess and apologized when she came home saying that she does love all of me, and that for now I can wear makeup when not around her and that she has things going on inside her that makes her not like herself and it's affecting a lot of things. She agreed that it is a possibility that it's not being with me as a woman that she has a problem with, but being perceived by others as being with a woman. I'm helping her find a therapist, though she is kinda reluctant to do therapy. It'll be interesting how this pans out as if you asked me two days ago if we'd still be together, it would have seemed like an impossibility. 

In a way this sounds a lot like what I've been through. My partner was OK with me presenting as myself when I was not around her but I had to explain to her that she would see me leaving for work and coming home in skirts and dresses. for a while I would walk in the door, straight to the our guest room (it's where my closet is) and change while avoiding her the whole time. Over time she got used to seeing me as myself but it's taken time and we're still working on it.

 

Our relationship has been rocky to say the least. She does love me so what's the problem? I came to the conclusion it's the lesbian factor. She never imagined herself as one. Yet here we are. I kind of pushed her into it and she having one heck of a time dealing with it. It still remains a topic we haven't really talked about yet we'll have to soon since we're out in public together a lot more these days.

[Heather Nicole]

2 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

My partner was OK with me presenting as myself when I was not around her but I had to explain to her that she would see me leaving for work and coming home in skirts and dresses. for a while I would walk in the door, straight to the our guest room (it's where my closet is) and change while avoiding her the whole time

 

I feel like I've had juuuust the sliiiightestest little hint of a tiny taste of this myself...

 

When I came out to my mom, (close to a year ago now...(wow...!)) I was still questioning and, in retrospect, I didn't actually use any words like "transgender" or "transition", etc. It was more like "I could never have brought myself to tell you this as a kid but...I always wished I could be a girl." The reaction was far, far, far more positive than I felt I could've ever imagined, which was wonderful...But I gradually realized I hadn't been nearly as forthcoming as I'd thought. So, I don't know if it was her chemo-fog or not, or whatever, but eventually, when I did tell her I wanted to "transition" her response was (in a concerned, presumptively negative tone) "so...like...wearing a dress?" Since she was beyond chempo's help at that point, and increasingly confused in general, I chose to just leave it at that, and not persue the matter any further.

 

Long story short, I can only imagine the vulnerability, and courage, and concern all involved in actually presenting authentically in front of a close loved one. 

[Heather Nicole]

(Shoot, I'm sorry if that came across as a "one-up" attempt, that wasn't my intention at all. I just, for what little it's worth, admire those who have gotten to a point of being out and open to the people close in their personal life. What I do know is how scary/intimidating a prospect that can be.)

[LaurenA]

Geeze did I screw up yesterday.  Last night a police officer rang my doorbell.  Wanted to know if I was the person who totaled a Tesla model S nearby.  I told her I had no clue.  I don't remember buying it, driving it, or crashing it.  But she had a picture of it on the side of the road and a bill of sale showing I bought it.  I explained I had just lost my partner and she took pity on me, no ticket.  But damn, did I ever screw up.

[christinakristy2021]

Good morning. How is everybody today? I am new in this forum discussion. ?

[Jamie68]

7 hours ago, LaurenA said:

Geeze did I screw up yesterday.  Last night a police officer rang my doorbell.  Wanted to know if I was the person who totaled a Tesla model S nearby.  I told her I had no clue.  I don't remember buying it, driving it, or crashing it.  But she had a picture of it on the side of the road and a bill of sale showing I bought it.  I explained I had just lost my partner and she took pity on me, no ticket.  But damn, did I ever screw up.

Oh yeah, you got lucky. Must live in a real small town. Could never get that lucky here.

[Jamie68]

1 hour ago, christinakristy2021 said:

Good morning. How is everybody today? I am new in this forum discussion. ?

Welcome aboard. Good people here.

[Jamie68]

12 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

 I had scheduled the day off from work today due to my partner having a medical appointment. The appointment was cancelled last minute so I was free for the day.

 

I took it upon myself to get the name changed on my vaccination card. The last thing I want to do is out myself if I ever have to show it to get in somewhere. The downside is it was a 45 minute drive just to get to the place to get a new card. They were really cool about it, didn't ask any questions or even look at me funny and I was done and on my way home in less than 10 minutes.

 

Not having much to do I though to go visit one of my partner's friends. She had told me that her friends are my friends so....  My partner was having a rough day medically and was planning to spend it in bed. I figured I was going out alone so I wanted to look nice. I wore my new green dress, it looks really nice with my black heeled boots. Out the door I went. Shortly after I got there my partner showed up. Guess she needed to get out of the house too. I don't think she realized how I was dressed when I left and made some comment (I didn't hear) to her friend about it. Her friend so awesome, I heard her reply but doesn't she look so good in it? My partner just said yea but it's hard to get used to seeing him in a dress. The misgendering bothers me but I'm trying to be an adult about it and didn't say anything. We still stayed for over 4 hours.

 

While we were there my partner had too much fun and I needed to driver her home. This was the first time we rode together with me in a dress and it was normal. I expected to hear some backlash for it but it never happened. I really need her to get adjusted to it. Especially with our vacation at the end of the month. There's no way I spending 4 nights away from home wearing nothing but jeans and t-shirts.

 

Making progress.

 

 

 

 

That's awesome. It's getting better here. Progress is finally happening. My wife said she will help me get a pair of womens glasses. Last night we almost decided on which wig I should buy. Just ordered some pretty winter boots last night. JUst ordered my first bra 2 nights ago, 42b. should come today. Hope it fits. Probably should have bought 42a, but hard to find. Bought some pretty leggings to work out in. I feel like my wife is finally figuring out that this isn't just a phase.

[Jamie68]

14 hours ago, KymmieL said:

Well my wife is saying I am changing inside. At times I sound like a girl on her monthly visitor. (should I be happy) She still does understand and has been trying to accept the things she cannot change. She could accept me as a crossdresser but not as a woman. I feel that her love for me is dwindling. While my love for her is as strong as ever. I might as well start looking to move.  Hey Bri, would you need a receptionist?

 

My oldest doesn't seem to want anything to do with me. He won't go to a car show, because that is what he and dad did. and I am not dad to him anymore.

 

I am still working up the courage to tell my mom. I don't know what I will do if she rejects me like my son did. Probably shoot myself.

My world is falling apart and it is all my fault.

 

Kymmie

Hang in there. Things will get better. Like many of us, you are on a roller coaster ride. Find the safety rail and hang on to it.

Your son may change. It takes a lot moe for the ones we love to accept us being different than what they thought we were their whole life. It's NOT your fault. It's our society that's at fault. You had no choice in who you are. If people don't accept this, it's their problem. Not yours.

 

[Ivy]

4 hours ago, Jamie68 said:

JUst ordered my first bra 2 nights ago, 42b. should come today. Hope it fits. Probably should have bought 42a, but hard to find.

Yeah, this

 

4 hours ago, Jamie68 said:

I feel like my wife is finally figuring out that this isn't just a phase.

I know it's a balancing act for those of you who are still married.   But I'm kinda jealous also.  

I hope y'all can work things out.  

I still miss my ex.  

[Jamie68]

1 hour ago, Jandi said:

4 hours ago, Jamie68 said:

JUst ordered my first bra 2 nights ago, 42b. should come today. Hope it fits. Probably should have bought 42a, but hard to find.

Yeah, this

Just got it. Cups are too big. Maybe try 40b with band extender.

[Ivy]

I have found 42A online.

[christinakristy2021]

8 hours ago, Jamie68 said:

Welcome aboard. Good people here.

thanks, @Jamie68

[Vidanjali]

My heart and thoughts are with those of you going through familial challenges. Do hang in there, please. 

 

Hi & welcome @christinakristy2021! 

[Aggie1]

Can it get any better? I keep waiting for someone to pop out from behind a curtain and say “psych!”

 

I got my electrolysis letter from Kaiser. I have an appointment at OHSU for a tracheal shave. I have an appointment with Kaiser for speech therapy. I applied for a job as a bus driver with the local school district and passed the in person entrance test and am scheduled for CDL training next month. I was selected to be a mentor for graduates from my alma mater Cornell who are on the track and cross country team. I’m gathering support from the leaders of Toastmasters District 7, Oregon and Washington, to cast a broader vision for training 4000 toastmasters in the district.

 

Everything seems too easy. All my life I’ve run into headwinds and had to slog through it. Someone is sure to remind  me soon that I’m not in Kansas anymore! When will the honeymoon be over? Is it ok to be happy?