Good morning All. Coffees on.

[Mmindy]

1 hour ago, Erica Gabriel said:

I have a butterfly pendant that I often wear. I also have a phoenix pendant that is also appropriate, but I really need to feel the fire in order to wear it.

??️‍⚧️?❤️?

[Guest]

1 hour ago, Mmindy said:

Erica, your picture that you posted on What are you wearing, show a wonderful start of the metamorphosis. It’s a great description of the process emotionally and physically. That’s why I put the caterpillar and butterfly in my signature. This picture is how I visualize the people here on TransPulseForums.
 

Best wishes, stay positive, and safe,

 

Mindy??️‍⚧️?

I have a butterfly pendant that I often wear. I also have a phoenix pendant that is also appropriate, but I really need to feel the fire in order to wear it.

[KymmieL]

11 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

 

OK, so that's not just me. 60 is COLD anymore.

 

Hugs!

And you live in Michigan.  I could see if you living in FL. My mom has been down there for over 20yrs. To her 60 is cold. For us its break out the shorts time. LOL. Seriously, It is getting cold in the lower 60s.

 

Kymmie

[Jamie68]

Good morning all. It's tea for me this morning.

I had a first yesterday. I was installing a furnace at my grandsons house. His girlfriend and 7 year old son were there.

The little guy came up to me and asked, are you a boy or a girl?  That took me by surprise. Of course I told him that I was a girl.

I was taken so much by surprise that I didn't even think to explain further. I wish that I would have. My grandson and his girlfriend were there when I was asked. He told me that the boy asked his mom and she didn't know what to say. She just told him to ask me. The boy told her that I didn't sound like a girl. I guess i'd better get started on my voice training.

[Elizabeth Star]

The meet up with my friend went really good. I had wanted to dress a little edgier and should have. She showed up looking all 80's rock looking in a black leather jacket with corseting, leggings, booties with buckles and a He-Man T-shirt. We checked out pretty much every shoe store but neither of us could find anything we had to have. We both got candles and body spray from bath and body works. Turns out we have extremely similar tastes in pretty much everything. I also got a new pair of winter leggings.  After several hours we came to that "is there anything else you need?" moment. I needed a bra. Like really needed one that felt and fit better than the $10 ones I currently have. So our last stop, Victoria's secret. I had been in that store several times before but never for myself. And since I had always been shopping for my partner I was alone. Big surprise, it was a totally different experience this time. In the end I got my new bra. I had a lot of fun and look forward to the next time.

[Jamie68]

1 hour ago, Elizabeth Star said:

The meet up with my friend went really good. I had wanted to dress a little edgier and should have. She showed up looking all 80's rock looking in a black leather jacket with corseting, leggings, booties with buckles and a He-Man T-shirt. We checked out pretty much every shoe store but neither of us could find anything we had to have. We both got candles and body spray from bath and body works. Turns out we have extremely similar tastes in pretty much everything. I also got a new pair of winter leggings.  After several hours we came to that "is there anything else you need?" moment. I needed a bra. Like really needed one that felt and fit better than the $10 ones I currently have. So our last stop, Victoria's secret. I had been in that store several times before but never for myself. And since I had always been shopping for my partner I was alone. Big surprise, it was a totally different experience this time. In the end I got my new bra. I had a lot of fun and look forward to the next time.

Sounds great. really nice to find someone with like tastes.

[Mmindy]

3 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I had a lot of fun and look forward to the next time.

Yea Liz! That's a great update. ?

 

4 hours ago, Jamie68 said:

The boy told her that I didn't sound like a girl. I guess i'd better get started on my voice training.

Out of the mouths of babes. Little one are to the point, and accepting even if you don't sound like a girl.

My youngest grandson (6yrs) asked me yesterday why I was wearing leggings and boots. I said it was cold and snowy so I wanted to be warm. His next statement was they look like mom's. Then I asked if he liked them, and his next response was; Okay, will you play Jenga?

 

Like you I need to work on my voice as well.

 

Have a great Monday,

 

Hugs,

 

Mindy??️‍⚧️?

[Ann W]

It's so nice to be affirmed by a child, because they're so honest.  I came out of a men's room at Lowe's, and a little girl sitting in a shopping cart looked at me and said "why did you go in there?" pointing at the sign on the door.  "I don't know" I said raising my arms to the side.  That kid made my day at the time.

[Aggie1]

15 hours ago, Erica Gabriel said:

I have a butterfly pendant that I often wear. I also have a phoenix pendant that is also appropriate, but I really need to feel the fire in order to wear it.

I can really relate to that butterfly metaphor. Metamorphosis. Lots of meta there! In fact, heavy meta!

 

I am tired of pulling up dandelions and weeds in my front lawn and begging the grass to grow every year so I have decided to transform it into a butterfly garden and joined the North American butterfly association. I will try to remember to post pictures of the progress, it’s still in the research and inspiration stage at the moment.if anyone here has experience, let me know of any lessons learned or advice!

[Sol]

Went to the doctor and wore my compression bra for the first time.

Honestly, it's kinda crazy how my comfort level changed. I was still anxious because doctor but I wasn't really worried about anything else. I've always been weirdly hyper aware of my breasts, but I didn't worry about them at all. Still not as flat as I'd like, but it's a start!

And woohoo, butterfly garden! 

I kinda want to start one, @AgnesBardsie. Any tips?

[Ivy]

Whoohoo…

Lots to read here.

I was camping and off the grid for a few days with some family.  Got a bit cold the last bit, but lots of layers work pretty well.

 

I was never in combat myself, but fully expected to go to Nam.  Because of my training I ended up in Germany instead.  I do consider myself a veteran tho, if not a combat veteran.  There was always that potential.

 

My youngest has been having troubles with her boyfriend.  She came here yesterday, and spent the night, but got up early and left.  I suppose she went home.  She stayed with me for awhile a couple of years ago when she moved back to NC from Utah.  I've kinda been expecting her to be back at some point.  She doesn't get along with her mother (my ex).  It would be a bit crowded but she is BI and has trans friends so that's not an issue.  But we definitely keep different hours.

Guess we'll see what happens.  But I do expect it sooner or later.

 

 

[Aggie1]

3 hours ago, Mmindy said:

Like you I need to work on my voice as well.

 

I’m getting serious about this. I have voice therapy through Kaiser every month which helps in a broad sense. They have me doing some fundamentals work on forward resonance with words that have lots of m’s and n’s in them. 
 

I also ran across an outfit in Vancouver wa called “your lessons now” which offers voice feminization, plus singing lessons plus voice over training. I signed up for a one hour lesson on Thursday. Then as chance would have it I sat next to Anna the CEO of the company at a Northwest Gender Alliance meeting at Elmers last week which solidified my resolve. She’s a great advertisement for the product she sells. Strong voice but unmistakably female.

Kaiser recommended an app called Voice Tools, look for a black mike on a blue, white, pink background. It shows where your voice is on a spectrograph in the male female range, plus piano keyboard with ABCDEFG and Hertz, suggested reading, analysis, and some other features.

 

Last month I doubted I could get there. Pretty sure with a little work that I can do this now. It’s kind of like learning a foreign language!

 

im feeling pretty encouraged at the moment

[Aggie1]

1 hour ago, Sol said:

And woohoo, butterfly garden! 

IKR!! I’m excited thinking about it! Should attract hummingbirds too! 
 

I have a tulip tree in the far corner a rhododendron in the middle and a Japanese maple up against the house. And a scrawny yard eking out an existence on a diet of clay-dirt and pebbles. I’ve been told that aeration with gypsum will help and planting a cover crop will add nitrogen to the soil.

 

I need to study up some more on the plants that support the full lifecycle for the most likely species of butterflies.

 

like I said still in the research and inspiration stage!

[LindaMarie]

19 hours ago, Erica Gabriel said:

I found my old work ID this morning. Looking at the handsome man in the photo brought some sadness. He did well, was strong and youthful for his age, fathered 3 daughters, was well liked and respected. I showed the ID to my wife and she told me it was hard for her to look at and I agreed. I mourn the passing of this man but am happy he finally removed the mask of masculinity and began the metamorphosis into her true self. She is much happier and balanced now.

So much that you say resembles my life. Better yet, my wife's life also. She married a young soldier, she brought life to our children, a good man she had, pictures in the living room, and love in her heart for her man, now she buys me perfume, hair spray, and more. ❤️

[Sol]

I return with flower knowledge!

Okay, so, some flowers that are good for butterflies are heliotropes, lantanas, and phlox. 

Heliotropes are shrubs that grow from 1-4 ft high, and they are poisonous if eaten in large quantities over a period of time, so if you have outdoor pets, DO NOT let them eat these, as they cause gastric distress from a slow acting toxin mostly affecting the liver. 

Lantanas are also poisonous when eaten, but their bright colors attract butterflies and hummingbirds while being a natural mosquito repellent. They require full sun and, from what I could find, don't get very big. I would do more research on that one, as it is a type of shrub.

Finally, phlox are carpet flowers that can get 4-6 inches thick. They enjoy full sun and aren't poisonous if ingested, so your pet can be around it safely. If you live in a climate that gets colder during the winter, you can protect the plant by putting some mulch on the ground under it, because some parts of the plant can die and this is supposed to help. Again, I would recommend some additional research.

All of these flowers are perennials that may die in winter, but they'll usually come back.

Hope this helps, @AgnesBardsie!

[Aggie1]

1 hour ago, Sol said:

All of these flowers are perennials that may die in winter, but they'll usually come back.

Hope this helps,

I love the idea of perennials and the colors? Gorgeous!

[Aggie1]

2 hours ago, Sol said:

I've always been weirdly hyper aware of my breasts, but I didn't worry about them at all. Still not as flat as I'd like, but it's a start!

I’ve had similar feelings about the nether regions. I’m reading a book called “The Gene. An intimate history.” I’m more convinced than ever that it’s more about nature and less about nurture. Although there is some interaction with the environment that can flip genes on or off. But in the end it’s the genetic makeup that drives the propensity to behave a certain way. It could be a gene that doesn’t completely turn on, maybe a like a dimmer switch, that requires an external action on our part to generate a dopamine hit or a signal to a neuron in our brain to stay active a tiny bit longer. 
 

The SRY gene is fascinating. Women born with XY chromosomes have fully functional female parts simply because one single solitary gene on the Y chromosome is flipped off. That’s the only difference! Every cell in their body is XY. But they identify as female. One girl said she tried playing on a boys soccer team but was kicked off when she suggested they call themselves the Butterflies!

 

From a genetic standpoint, we’re a lot more alike than we imagine! 

 

There’s a whole chapter on gender identity and sexual orientation. I bought it for a buck at a used book stall staffed by a town library at a celebrate diversity festival where I volunteered to staff a PFLAG booth. The book is written by a Pulitzer Prize author and traces the history of the study of genetic from Aristotle and Pythagoras through Darwin and Mendel and the human genome project, and the social impacts of eugenics in Supreme Court decisions like Buck v Bell and of course the Nazis, and on the shaping of public opinion on racism and transgenderism. It’s over 500 pages long but it has really helped congeal some of my thoughts.

[Jackie C.]

16 hours ago, KymmieL said:

And you live in Michigan.  I could see if you living in FL. My mom has been down there for over 20yrs. To her 60 is cold. For us its break out the shorts time. LOL. Seriously, It is getting cold in the lower 60s.

 

It's the HRT. Nobody said being a girl just meant you were going to be cold all the time.

 

11 hours ago, Jamie68 said:

The little guy came up to me and asked, are you a boy or a girl?  That took me by surprise. Of course I told him that I was a girl.

 

I get this from the kids at the center from time to time. I put on a manic grin and say, "Yes."

 

4 hours ago, AgnesBardsie said:

Kaiser recommended an app called Voice Tools, look for a black mike on a blue, white, pink background. It shows where your voice is on a spectrograph in the male female range, plus piano keyboard with ABCDEFG and Hertz, suggested reading, analysis, and some other features.

 

Voice tools was OK to check your progress, but I tried a bunch of different products.

 

Also woo hoo to @Elizabeth Star for having a friend to go shopping with! A best friend to do something with is something I've been feeling the lack of lately. I did get through my bra fitting without too much drama though. $150 later, I have two new pairs that actually fit (and no underwire).

 

Hugs!

[Aggie1]

3 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

Voice tools was OK to check your progress, but I tried a bunch of different products.

Do share?!

[Vidanjali]

19 hours ago, KymmieL said:

I could see if you living in FL. My mom has been down there for over 20yrs. To her 60 is cold.

 

I live in Florida. To me, 80 is chilly, 70 is cold, and 60 is practically freezing. ?

[Annette]

1 hour ago, Vidanjali said:

To me, 80 is chilly, 70 is cold, and 60 is practically freezing.

 

35F here today, feeling 28. I was pondering if I should wear a sweater, then decided on a t-shirt with a jacket. Felt ok.

Not bragging, just proving a perspective.

On the way to the store saw a guy riding a bicycle in his shorts and a light windbreaker. Humans, what an adaptable bunch ?

[Vidanjali]

7 hours ago, AgnesBardsie said:

IKR!! I’m excited thinking about it! Should attract hummingbirds too! 
 

I have a tulip tree in the far corner a rhododendron in the middle and a Japanese maple up against the house. And a scrawny yard eking out an existence on a diet of clay-dirt and pebbles. I’ve been told that aeration with gypsum will help and planting a cover crop will add nitrogen to the soil.

 

I need to study up some more on the plants that support the full lifecycle for the most likely species of butterflies.

 

like I said still in the research and inspiration stage!

 

This is great @AgnesBardsie . I hope you'll enjoy learning about how to butterfly garden as I have. I live in the opposite corner of the country from you, but I can tell you how I went about learning everything I have. Every time I saw a butterfly in the neighborhood or vicinity, I'd ID it, and find out what it's host plant(s) is/are. (If you participate in social media such as facebook, you can probably find a butterfly gardening group for your neck of the woods.) I have designated areas for different species of butterfly and each one contains different host plants. Generally speaking, butterflies enjoy nectar from all flowers, but are prone to feed from those of corresponding size to their proboscis. So, tiny flowers for tiny butterflies, etc. Also, if you watch, the butterflies will tell you what they like. For instance, if you visit a nursery to buy plants, pay attention to which ones visiting insects seem to be enjoying. A very fun thing to do is to designate wildflower areas. Throw a packet of wildflower seeds onto a pile of topsoil and wait. You can get wildflower mixes selected for your region of the country. Pull the flowers out as they expire, reseed and resoil seasonally. Weed selectively. You may learn some naturally occurring weeds are host plants. All butterflies will enjoy nectar from weed flowers and the wildflowers. Zinnias and marigolds are nice to grow from seed for the summer and poppies are nice when it's cooler. Consider raised beds for rocky areas. In this case, always do with more soil than you'd expect because it'll settle. It's fun to be resourceful when creating borders. I hauled a bunch of oolite rocks from a construction site (with permission) to create some of my borders. Gardening is always a work in progress. Have fun and don't worry if something doesn't work - it just provides the opportunity to try something new. Looking forward to hearing about your progress. 

[Vidanjali]

1 hour ago, Annette said:

 

35F here today, feeling 28. I was pondering if I should wear a sweater, then decided on a t-shirt with a jacket. Felt ok.

Not bragging, just proving a perspective.

On the way to the store saw a guy riding a bicycle in his shorts and a light windbreaker. Humans, what an adaptable bunch ?

 

?? It is pretty amazing ??

[Aggie1]

1 hour ago, Vidanjali said:

Have fun and don't worry if something doesn't work - it just provides the opportunity to try something new. Looking forward to hearing about your progress. 

This is so encouraging! Thanks for sharing!

 

Great idea about Facebook groups! I do it with rock painting. Why not butterflies!?

 

Trying new things is a proven way to stay young!

[Elizabeth Star]

7 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

It's the HRT. Nobody said being a girl just meant you were going to be cold all the time.

Seriously. I always disliked cold weather. Now it seems like I'm always cold.