Finally came out to the wife, Shock and surpise

[KymmieL]

Holey Crap. I couldn't believe it. I just came out to my wife. I think I am still in shock. Not that it went bad just the opposite. She said I known it for years. We even joked about it. She teased me about giving me some of her old saggy been pregnant boobs. I told her I'll grow my own, thanks anyway. She didn't balk at that idea so. She kind of figured it out by my choosing female characters in when I can. In my video games. That I had a soft feminine core. So I'm going to plug along.

 

I may start HRT once I get another therapist, as I have my final session with her on Tuesday. She is moving out of state.☹️. She put in a referral for me to continue, seeing one. Thankfully VA is paying for it all.

 

Kymmie 

[Ashlee]

Awesome! A huge weight lifted from you I'm sure.

[Willow]

Good for you. Time to move forward 

 

 

[Susan R]

I am so happy to hear about this.  I applaud your courage & willpower and wish you the very best.  I bet you'll feel wonderful after the initial shock calms down a bit. Communication is a main key to most if not all good relationships.

 

Im very happy for you!

SusanMtF

[Jani]

Kymmie this is good news.  I am so happy for you.  It is interesting that those closest to us know us very well.   My wife had offered to let me have her "girls" also but I told her it doesn't work that way.  I grew my own too. 

 

BIG Hugs!!!

Jani

[KymmieL]

Thank you all. Yeah, I do feel better. But still some what shocked. I think it will be with me for a while. Now for the next step.

 

Kymmie

[Dakota16]

I’m so happy to hear your wife is on board!

[Lauren245]

Great news Kymmie!!! 

 

My wife (girlfriend at the time) was the first one I came out to and had "The Conversation" with - it's an absolutely terrifying experience putting yourself out there like that, and you are to be applauded for your courage to go through with it!! 

 

The hard part is not knowing what will come of it in those nerve wracking few moments after you tell her.  It sounds as if she's a supporter, which is awesome!!!  So happy for you, and I wish you two nothing but a wonderful lifetime of love together ahead!!

 

❤️ Lauren

[KymmieL]

UP DATE:

Well had some what of a I can really call it a set back. But hears what happened. Me and the wife are enjoying a shower together after our concert on Friday. As normal I shave south. She actually completely does my back. I get the razor back and proceed to shave the north end. I was shaving between my breasts when the wife said. leave some I like a little fuzz there. I responded that girls don't have hair there. She asked you want to be a girl? I said I told you I was transgender.  It was like she didn't know what the term meant. She went on about not marrying a woman and wanted me to have something south. I was about to tell her that she knows that the lower plumbing hasn't worked right in a few years. But didn't want to get into an argument. So I finished and got my Pjs on.

 

After things where back to normal. Don't really know but I will be bringing it up to my counselor tomorrow.

 

Kymmie

[Susan R]

Hi Kymmie,  I'm sorry you had this setback.  From your original post on this thread, it seemed as though it all went well.  She understood and accepted it.  Maybe she really didn't get it.  It's really hard to say.

My wife has known about me for months and a few nights ago she shocked me.  Out of the blue, she made an idiotic statement that made me think she thought my wanting to transition had an external causation...inferring there's a cure.  When I came out to her, I had explained in depth what I am experiencing and what I am.  You would think she'd get it.  Well, apparently not.

I hope your therapist has some revelations for you tomorrow.  I certainly have no answers.  Maybe someone else here has some understanding.

 

Keep us updated if you can,

Susan R?

[Kirsten]

It has now been a year since I told my wife I was transitioning. And 4 months full time.  And we have definitely had setbacks. The process is a very difficult one. One that I feel is harder on our partner than ourselves. We have had a lifetime to come to terms with what this means. They have not. When I finally started to live full time the setbacks are smaller. But there are still issues here and there that we have to deal with and find solutions to. 

Overall I see setbacks not really as setbacks but more of times when understanding, clarification, and conversation are needed.  Times that have brought me and my partner closer together. Take advantage of these moments. It’s when you both get to share with each other and see just a little bit more of who you married. 

But don’t get upset or hurt. It takes time. And it’s a process. Enjoy yours with the person you love. It’ll all work out. 

[Willow421]

Kymmie, i suspect your story is a familiar one. I talked with my wife two weeks ago, all was good and she was endearing and supportive. Time passes and she now struggles with anger, tells me Christmas is ruined because of the "bombshell" I dropped on her. 

 

I am giving her space right now. 

 

I'm new to acknowledging and accepting my feminine self. I am close to securing a therapist to whom I can talk about this type of situation. I am sure this will help me and hopefully my spouse.

 

I expect setbacks, struggles, and disappointment. I don't know where the path ahead of me will lead.

 

I feel for you and your current situation. Thank you for sharing, it means much to me to know others experience a similar pathway. 

 

Willow