Coming out

[Susan]

Hey all. I am sorry i had not wrote about something I did this past Christmas but I felt like writing about it now. I came out to my sister over the phone. I felt skeptical about how she would take it and later I texted her and asked her about it. She told me she had process it but that she would always love me no matter what. The only thing that did hurt some is that she didn't use the correct pronoun but I think that will chang In time. I also think she was shocked as well so that might be a reason why she called me her brother instead sister. Idk. Anyways, I was relieved even though i wanted to tell her in person. Well comments are welcome. Thanks and hugs all!!!!?

[Heather L]

That's wonderful!  Go you for coming out to her, and it's excellent that she's loving and willing to process.  Pronouns are hard -- they're such a deep part of our language and she's known you under one set of pronouns for all of your lives.  It will take time to change that.  Be kind and loving with her and she'll probably adapt in time.  You want support, but she probably does too at this point.

 

Congratulations and hugs!

[Susan]

Thanks heather!! My next steps are my mother and brother and my daughter and niece and nephew. It will be a chore but 8 feel it has to be done because they deserve it even if they were to turn away. 

[Susan R]

25 minutes ago, Susan said:

Anyways, I was relieved even though i wanted to tell her in person.

Hi Susan, congrats on this milestone.  At least you did it and that's the important thing.  I'm not going to be able to come out to some of my family because they live too far and it's just not feasible.  This coming out stuff is hard.  But from what I've heard it gets easier after the first few.  Good luck on those coming up next.  I wish you the very best.

 

Susan R?

[Ashlee]

7 hours ago, Susan said:

Hey all. I am sorry i had not wrote about something I did this past Christmas but I felt like writing about it now. I came out to my sister over the phone. I felt skeptical about how she would take it and later I texted her and asked her about it. She told me she had process it but that she would always love me no matter what. The only thing that did hurt some is that she didn't use the correct pronoun but I think that will chang In time. I also think she was shocked as well so that might be a reason why she called me her brother instead sister. Idk. Anyways, I was relieved even though i wanted to tell her in person. Well comments are welcome. Thanks and hugs all!!!!?

That's who I came out to first too, my sister, in the same way basically. "Happy Thanksgiving, btw, I'm trans" everything was fine except the "I still love you" comment my sister told me. I know she ment it in a loving way but it just sounded like I did something wrong, but she still loved me. After talking she explained she already figured I was  trans from my behavior when we were younger so it's pretty open now. 

I'm so happy for you. It is a great feeling to get it off your chest and just tell someone. It will get easier with each person too, at least it did in my case. Yaaay! One day at a time moving forward. 

Ashlee ?

 

[DeeDee]

7 hours ago, Susan said:

The only thing that did hurt some is that she didn't use the correct pronoun but I think that will chang In time. I also think she was shocked as well so that might be a reason why she called me her brother instead sister.

Hi Susan, well done on saying something - it is a scary thing to do!  I have been wrestling with pronouns recently and decided that speaking and texting is also ingrained with gender bias, all my friends male and female call a group of people "guys", and we have been referring to each other as "dude!" for as long as we've known each other - I know its not done maliciously, but now I can openly use hugs "x" at the end of texting without having to go back and delete it or get ribbed for it if I don't notice! ? Others have assured me it gets easier with time.