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By Lydia_R · Posted
I'm 53yo as I write this. I have been on a M->F transition journey for several years. My last two female partners died in 2017 and in 2019 and I've been single since then living alone in my medium small sized house until 5 months ago. For various reasons, mostly financial, I opened my house up to roommates even though my house is technically a one bedroom house. Since then, I've had 3 Gen Z transwomen live with me off and on. They have brought their transwomen friends over. Last week I had a new transwoman friend over who is just a couple years younger than me and we had a good cuddle together. I dated an older transwoman last year for 3 months. I had another Gen Z transwoman over a couple weeks ago. And there is a transman who has become a friend and has been over several times and might be by today. You can go back to my first posts on this site and read about how concerned I was that transitioning would make me even more isolated than I had been. And I have been very, very isolated for several decades. But obviously quite the opposite has happened. I don't know how representative of the larger world what I see in my house is. I've played music with almost all of the people that have come through my house. Most of them are excellent musicians and playing a style on acoustic instruments that is a new sound for me to listen to. It certainly hasn't been perfect either. For various reasons, the living arrangement here has been a struggle. Finances have been a problem for all of us. I think every last one of us has lived in cars for extended periods of time. Anyway. I'm in reflection mode closing this scene down. Last week was frantic with packing, inventory and cleaning. I'm mostly in relaxation mode now. It's 11:07am. I just finished lunch and I'm a little sleepy. I've only been sleeping 4 hours a night for the last 3 months because of a crazy unpaid work situation I've been in, so perhaps I'll treat myself to a nap and try to get back to a healthier sleep schedule. It's been a whirlwind of activity this year and much of that is going to continue on for me. I feel blessed to have the virtual community on TGP and this physical community in my home. I wasn't quite expecting this aspect of transition. I think the first thing my last GT said to me was "you should find some transgender community online." The first 2 GT I had didn't work well for me and I dumped them pretty quickly, but my last one did great with me. She always pointed out that I was pretty well adjusted. It's not like this transgender experience needs to be some mental crisis or medical problem. I haven't seen my GT in probably 7 months now mostly because of financial problems, but I'm doing fine with it all. She did a really good job guiding me through this journey. Just so you know, I tend to not ask questions much unless someone is saying something that I am interested in and have an idea for clarification. I tend to just spill my guts about things and think that others do that as well without being asked questions. So.... What has your experience been like meeting other transgender people? What does the community feel like in your environment? Is this just crazy liberal Portland stuff or are there pockets of this all over the place? Hugs, Lydia -
By Ivy · Posted
I think I do live in the moment - perhaps too much sometimes. As for the demons… -
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By Ivy · Posted
It certainly can be. But it doesn't have to be. The sports always come up, it's kinda the gateway. And yeah, it's not simple. I think there is no blanket solution for that one. I also think there is no blanket solution for HRT. As such it should be left up to the individuals involved. I don't think puberty blockers, and hormones should be given out like candy - especially to kids. However, with counseling, and the involvement of the parents and doctors, the state should stay out of it. For a trans person there is an advantage to starting fairly young. I wish I could have. The idea that the human race will die out if we let people transition is ludicrous. Cis people have no desire to transition and I expect there will still be plenty of people with the urge to [procreate] to keep things going. Trans people may be more visible these days, but trans people have always existed. And the last I looked, there are still enough people around to screw things up. -
By Mmindy · Posted
Good afternoon everyone, While I’m here late today, my morning was filled with tasks. I hope your Monday is going well and you have a wonderful week. Hugs, Mindy🌈🐛🏳️⚧️🦋 -
By Vidanjali · Posted
Grievous, illogical, counterproductive, and shameful. If ciswomen truly require protection via government policy, then by the same token so do trans people. Both the feminist and trans communities essentially want the same things - access to healthcare; autonomy over one's own body to benefit from that healthcare; freedom from violence and discrimination; and the right to be as they are regardless of status quo societal expectations, stereotypes, myths, and biases. These so-called protections do nothing but enforce patriarchal domination while further splintering communities who, logically speaking, SHOULD be allied as not only do they fundamentally have the same goals, but a wealth of knowledge and experience of how to organize and achieve. -
By Justine76 · Posted
I was just thinking about how I present in dreams the other day. Interesting topic for sure. In many of my dreams I'm often depersonalized to some degree; like a camera or observer not fully integrated with the content. When I am 'me', I'm usually much younger, late teen'ish - young adult. But gender doesn't seem to come into play much. If anything, I'm agender in most dreams. -
By Lydia_R · Posted
Commenting on this kind of thing is a very delicate business for me, but I have strong feelings about it all. I think my problem with commenting on it is that I feel it is a fairly complicated subject and I would have to write a lot to cover the entire topic. I don't just blanket support trans rights. I follow the logic of "our" antagonists. I think that especially, transgender sports is a "problem". I'm not at all a sports person beyond enjoying board games, bike rides and throwing a frisbee. But I can see the point of having transwomen competing along side cis gendered woman being an unfair advantage. Not this this subject is directly related to this thread.... This thread mentions treating a "condition". I dislike the label "gender dysphoria" and would never use that to describe myself in the same way that it would be very unlikely that I would ever call myself disabled even if I was confined to a wheelchair. I was a proponent of marijuana legalization in the 1990's and still am to some degree. I disliked the term "medical marijuana" and choose not to participate in that system. When recreational marijuana became legal in Oregon, I eventually went to a store and bought some. I was in my mid-40's and by that time was so sober and health conscious that I didn't want to hurt my lungs or really even feel intoxicated, so it really didn't do much to me when I smoked it and I didn't smoke much of it or spend any significant money on it. The law allows us to grow 4 plants, so I did that several times. I enjoy the process and the smell of the fresh leaves and buds. When I harvest it, and then smoke it, it's the same thing. I don't want to hurt my body or feel intoxicated. So the jar of it sat on the shelf and I got the idea of burning it for incense. I love the smell of it and it was fun to burn it. It's been several years since I've done that, but I'll likely do that again some day. This article also mentions classifying puberty blockers along with cocaine and heroine. They are all chemicals to consume and in that regard could be considered a medicine. Food, sugar and caffeine are also chemicals to consume as is paint fumes. Gun violence is absolutely awful, but you can certainly kill someone pretty quickly with a metal shish kabob or a letter opener. So, do these arguments, laws and proposed laws hold any water? Is there something wrong with puberty blockers? Is the problem that young people are making permanent decisions about altering their body in a synthetic way that destroys their ability to have children? Is the goal of government to promote a growing economy that is based on population growth? Is the problem that people are afraid that if a large portion of people experiment with these chemicals and procedures, that population will drop to a point and we'll enjoy not having children so much that we as a species will go extinct? I'd say that that last argument holds some water, but that we are hardly in a position to go extinct any time soon. Is the problem that we are afraid that these young people will regret their decisions that kill their fertility and will miss out on getting meaning from life from having children? If people aren't getting meaning from their children, can they find it anywhere else? Or is the real problem that people are triggered by distasteful cross dressing? One of my favorite movies is Easy Rider and the line that Jack Nicholson delivers "they have this scissor happy beautify America thing going on." I think that stereotypes exist naturally. Discrimination is a natural thing. We use color and smell to discern "good" objects (food), from "bad" objects. It's a material universe. All objects have borders starting with the round stars and planets. There is good food and bad food, isn't there? But we can use that logic as a weapon. So, what can we do about it? What can we, as members of the transgender community, do about these laws? I mentioned in another thread on this site I believe.... Yes, it's here: https://www.transgenderpulse.com/forums/index.php?/topic/90578-what-do-you-think-is-the-biggest-block-to-lgbtq-acceptance/#comment-856442 Perhaps it is just my personal culture with the whole thing, or perhaps there is a bigger thing going on in the world. I'm a musician who does not like playing concerts. I enjoy making solo music for my website. My last roommate and I got into a lot of intense political discussions and he mentioned that virtually everybody goes to the grocery store. So that is the most public place there is. We also got into discussions about different sections of the USA doing a segregation type of thing. I certainly perceive my environment in Portland Oregon to be a liberal place and all 4 of the transwomen who have lived with me this year said they moved here from the south for the acceptance and medical care. Is segregating the country like this a dangerous road to go down? And this kind of thinking can go on and on and I certainly want to mention abortion now and then press on to environmental issues and indigenous cultures. As someone who claims to be sober, is HRT a designer drug and I'm actually not sober at all? My driver's license says female on it. Should I be paranoid about using the women's bathroom? All the stalls in there have doors on them. And hooks. I passed some WPATH steps sincerely. -
By awkward-yet-sweet · Posted
Inner demon? I don't think I have one of those... I do worry some about the future, and sometimes that can make me a bit nippish. But mostly I am in the present. -
By awkward-yet-sweet · Posted
From what I see, the legal system gives wildly varying results. And the difference between civil proceedings and criminal proceedings changes things as well. I have never been on a jury, but I have been through the court process after I was attacked in 2022. The guy was found guilty and sent to prison, but I definitely didn't get a million dollars. Of course he had basically no property or money that could be taken, so even if there had been a ruling of that sort it would have been like asking for blood from a turnip. Maybe Summer Bushnell has a lot of money? Who knows. I understand that comparing being hurt by lies and being physically hurt and left with some permanent damage is like comparing apples and oranges, and that comparing results from one location to another has similar issues. Still, it seems strange that one thing is worth a million dollars and the other is not. -
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By Vidanjali · Posted
I had an inspiring weekend. Our vet detected a large splenic mass in our beautiful husky Saturday morning requiring immediate emergency surgery. We transferred her to the hospital our excellent vet recommended where she had a successful, uncomplicated surgery to remove the spleen and mass, and stayed over one night without any post-op complications. We were able to bring her home last night and she's so happy and content. So now I'm focused on nursing her through her recovery. Throughout this episode, after an initial brief feeling of panic, I found my mind calm, focused, and optimistic throughout. I spent time meditating and being with my girl in spirit while she was still in the hospital. She is so brave and strong and good. I thank God for the mental stability I've developed through grace which was tested this weekend, for the superb healthcare providers we are blessed with, for the means to be able to afford healthcare, and for the life of this amazing girl who is the embodiment of sweetness, determination, and endurance. All so very inspiring. We await the pathology report, but I have not been dwelling on that. Just so blessed to be together with this girl.
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