How to deal with the wait...

[A. Dillon]

I am kind of steady right now, but I just have one question; how do you deal with the wait?!? I now have to wait a few weeks just get an appointment, and then another probable 5-6 months to go to that appointment, to then wait weeks (or forever, according to my dad) for T. That is not even counting top surgery, which wearing the binder is a constant reminder of. Baking helps to distract me, but I am running out of flour. Any ideas?

 

[Jackie C.]

Keep busy. That's the only thing that really helps for me. I'm looking forward ... well, I'm looking forward to most of it, I'm not looking forward to being off HRT for five weeks, but totally looking forward to my bottom surgery. In the meantime I'm writing, cooking... apparently acting as cat furniture... and keeping my mind engaged with other things. I get being impatient. Even once you start HRT the changes don't happen all at once (though faster for you because you're younger and T works faster than E). All you can do is keep busy and remind yourself that you're moving forward. Not as fast as you'd like (because that would involve a genie), but you're making progress. Progress is good, right?

 

Hugs!

[A. Dillon]

Yeah, I realized a genie wouldn't work after I sprinkled glitter on my head at the age of 12 and wished that I would be a boy when I woke up the next morning.

 

Thank you for the advice though. I am thinking about creating an exercise routine for myself to do everyday while I wait, and I think that will help. God luck on your bottom surgery, though!

[TTheta]

Best way for me is to not think about it, as hard as it seems. Keep yourself busy like @Jackie C. said, she had great advice. 

[Jackie C.]

I hear you. I rub EVERYTHING but no genie yet. They're more elusive than "Aladdin" and "I Dream of Jeanie" would have you believe.

 

Exercise is probably a good plan. My routine keeps me focused and my gym friends are both encouraging and a lot of fun. Also putting on some extra muscle might help with your dysphoria. Especially if you bulk up your upper body. In any case, my surgeon recommended... OK, demanded... that I be the lightest and best shape of my life before surgery. I guess it's one part of my transition I've got total control over. That feels pretty good to be honest.

 

Hugs!

[Jackie C.]

Oh, on that note. Check and see if your gym has a unisex bathroom. I don't know about you, but I always feel like a frog on the highway in the men's room*. Having a private place to change helps my anxiety tremendously. As a bonus, nobody comments on my breasts.

 

Hugs!

 

*My state has bathroom laws. I cannot legally use the women's room until after I've had my bottom surgery. This sucks exactly as much as you think.

[reyindium]

I stay very busy. I work full time and I am in nursing school at night. Time has flown for me. I like to break it down into more manageable chunks. Instead of thinking about my appointment in 6 months, I focus on the fact I have a test in two weeks. Or what project I have due at work.

But it was hard waiting for that first appointment. Made it in July and their first opening was mid November. But things moved very fast after that. I was given my rx for T that night of the appointment. Aiming for my top surgery to be done next December since that's when I graduate. Working on my tattoo sleeve this upcominh January. Then I probably will look into getting braces or Invisalign after that. Taking it one day and one goal at a time.