Hi from Sydney Australia

[Berni]

Hi,

 

My name is Berni and I am a 56 year old transgender woman. I decided, at 50 (after, yet again purging so many beautiful clothes) , that I'd had enough of hiding my true self and began to slowly (very slowly) change for the better.

 

6 years later I now present the way I have always felt inside. I'm 5 months on HRT, feeling absolutely wonderful, and praying the HRT fairy is kind to me.

 

So, say hi ... I'd live to hear from you.

[VickySGV]

Welcome @Berni we have a good group here from many places over the globe.  We can all tell the stories of long waits and much soul searching to find out who we really were, and the relief when we finally got busy working.

[Berni]

27 minutes ago, VickySGV said:

Welcome @Berni we have a good group here from many places over the globe.  We can all tell the stories of long waits and much soul searching to find out who we really were, and the relief when we finally got busy working.

Wow! Such a fast reply! Thankyou for the lovely welcome. You are right about busy! I e been at this for years but still feel like I have so much to learn and do.

[Susan R]

1 hour ago, Berni said:

I decided, at 50 (after, yet again purging so many beautiful clothes) , that I'd had enough of hiding my true self and began to slowly (very slowly) change for the better.

 

Hi Berni and Welcome! It’s a pleasure to meet you. I remember that feeling of regret all too well realizing that I need to start all over again. Shortly before a purge, we actually believe we can just toss everything aside without any consequences. There’s a moment or two there where it seems like ‘we’re all good now and it’s finally over’...never again will I believe that. LOL  Eventually, we learn that there’s much more to it.  It took me 56 years to learn the truth. I didn’t see see how deeply a part of my core it went.   Once we accept who we are, we see how crazy it is to think that we can ignore a huge part of our being.

Berni, it looks like you’re on your way to better things now. I’m glad you decided to reach out to us here. You’ll find many others here finding their way as you have....myself included. Thanks for sharing a part of your story tonight. I hope to read more.

 

Warmest Regards,

Susan R?

[Berni]

25 minutes ago, Susan R said:

Shortly before a purge, we actually believe we can just toss everything aside without any consequences. There’s a moment or two there where it seems like ‘we’re all good now and it’s finally over’... 

Thankyou @Susan R for the kind welcome.

 

Goodness me yes, I've lost count of the number of times I've thrown everything away, honestly believing that "this time" I could stop all that nonsense.

 

Amazingly, incredibly,  wonderfully that "nonsense" has become integral to my life. And I am so much happier for it.

 

[Lexi C]

Hey Berni Yup being there done that. TP is a great source for soul searched. Wonderful people, warm place to look , read and reply.

Be safe, BE Proud and Throw a shrimp on the BarBi for me

[Berni]

2 hours ago, Lexi C said:

 

Be safe, BE Proud and Throw a shrimp on the BarBi for me

'ken oath I will mate. No worries.

[Jackie C.]

Hey @Berni!

 

We had pretty similar ideas. The only real difference is that I said, "GCS by 50." Also, I've never purged clothes. And I'm in another hemisphere... Still, similar! ?

 

Pleased to meet you! Like the others said, there's lots to read here and feel free to ask us about pretty much anything.

 

Hugs!

[Berni]

28 minutes ago, Jackie C. said:

Hey @Berni!

 

We had pretty similar ideas. The only real difference is that I said, "GCS by 50." Also, I've never purged clothes. And I'm in another hemisphere... Still, similar! ?

 

Pleased to meet you! Like the others said, there's lots to read here and feel free to ask us

 

Hi @Jackie C. lovely to meet you ...  I'm a long way from GCS, but I do have a tracheal shave booked for the 24th this month! Cant wair

[Jani]

Hello Berni and welcome to our world!  I'm so glad you found us.  How many have said "I'd had enough of hiding"?  Me, Me, Me!  Lets not talk about all the clothing!  Argh!   I look forward to seeing you around.

 

Cheers, Jani

[Berni]

Thankyou for the kind welcome @Jani. Everyone here is so welcoming. Lovely!

 

[Elizabeth Star]

Hi Berni.

[Berni]

Hi @ElizabethStar. Nice to meet you.

[KayC]

Hi @Berni!  nice to meet you and Welcome!
Thank you for sharing your journey and happy you are joining us!  this is a really great group here, and they have helped me immensely to finally move forward myself. 

I am sure you will find the same and also be able to share and help others.  Oh, yeah!  and Thank You (already) for the great tip on the GICollection store❣️

 

Deep breaths ... one step at a time

[Berni]

Hi @KayC.

Thankyou for the welcome. Ive found the group amazingly welcoming ... I hope I didn't break the trust with my first post however, as I included a picture of underwear ... outside community rules. A bit embarrassing.

 

I'm loving the carmen lui underwear... made by trans women for transwomen. Ive never been able to find a bra that actually fitted properly before .... 36A . So nice to feel comfortable.

 The thong panties are also great ... no more visible pantie line ... and being wider in the crotch that your cis female thong, I'm not slipping out.

Thanks for getting in touch

[KayC]

6 hours ago, Berni said:

Thanks for getting in touch

Thank you too, Berni, and for the details on the lingerie.  That is exactly what I am looking for wrt the fit, so I think I will try out a bra and panty set.
Don't worry about the faux pas.  I made a few myself at the beginning but the moderators are great! and they help us out often.

Looks like we are close to the same time zone, and I know there a few other members from Down Under.  So, look forward to hearing from you again.  Have a great weekend❣️

(btw, you look great in your profile pic, and I love your style!)

[Berni]

48 minutes ago, KayC said:

Have a great weekend❣️

(btw, you look great in your profile pic, and I love your style!)

Oh my goodness! Thankyou so much!!

You are the only person who has ever complimented me as a woman... I'm actually a little bit teary now.

 

I have to admit that is my favourite picture of me and it is the closest to how I've always imagined myself.

 

The top is from Zara. In guy mode I always loved vests and I want to keep them as part of my style ... but girly, if you know what i mean. However, my old boy vests are too blocky and dont create a feminine outline ... nice womens vests are super hard to find so I was so so happy to find this one in zara.

 

The picture is also really special to me (I hope you dont mind me going on and on)

 

That was the day I was scheduled for a tracheal shave operation. I'd flown up to Brisbane the night before and presented at hospital at 6.30am that morning. I was turned away by the hospital as Sydney had been declared a covid hotspot by Queensland health... so they refused to operate and sent me away.

 

I was devastated. My money wasted on flights and accommodation, and I was stuck in a strange city for two days, alone, as I couldn't change my return ticket.

 

After crying for ages I went out and bought $150 in makeup ... came back to the room, showered, shaved, put on the makeup, dressed , took some photos and went out into Brisbane as a woman ... as me.

 

I felt invincible.

 

 

 

[Heather Shay]

@Berni turn on the tears again because if I didn't mention it - you certainly are a beautiful young lady and I love the vest look.

[KayC]

7 hours ago, Berni said:

The picture is also really special to me

I'm so sorry, Berni.  That must've been a great disappointment for you, but I am happy you were able to turn that around and make it a special Brisbane trip at the end.

Thank you for sharing that story.  That makes that photo even more special.  You're truly a natural beauty❣️

[Jani]

I agree @Berni that vests are cool, but it is so hard to find them!  

 

I'm sorry to hear of your disappointment about surgery, but you did rescue the time and it sounds like you had fun.  I do agree that your avatar photo is smashing!!  I love your style!

 

Cheers, Jani

[Lee H]

On 8/31/2020 at 8:20 PM, Berni said:

I'm 5 months on HRT, feeling absolutely wonderful, and praying the HRT fairy is kind to me.

The HRT fairy is smiling down at you, Bernie, especially the day of that photo. She must have been making up for the Covid-close. Did you get hit on in Brisbane?

This really is a great group. You're 5 months further and 20 years younger than me, but I hope to be starting HRT soon. I really enjoy the feminine conversations. Girls are just nicer, ya' know?

~~Here comes a great big hug from Leah - ummm, welcome home, Girlfriend, we're glad you're here ~~

 

[Berni]

10 hours ago, Leah said:

The HRT fairy is smiling down at you, Bernie, especially the day of that photo. She must have been making up for the Covid-close. Did you get hit on in Brisbane?

 

 

Thankyou for your kind words. The idea of being hit on made me laugh and isnt something I've even considered. The answer is a definitive No! I did get stared at quite a bit however ... but that's something I'm completely use to now. 

 

You are right about the fantastic community here. Everyone has been so nice to me. Feels like the sisterhood I've always longed for.

[Berni]

@Leah ... also, good luck the the HRT... I know everyone says this, but for me it was life changing.

[Robin.C]

Hi @Berni welcome to TP.

My apologies for the late welcome. I can definitely say the people here are wonderful and supportive.

And I agree with everyone your picture is lovely.

 

Plus I hope you are doing okay over there in the East ?

 

Hugs

Robin

 

 

 

[Berni]

On 9/5/2020 at 5:21 PM, Robin.C said:

Plus I hope you are doing okay over there in the East ?

 

 

 

 

Hi Robin, I guess you are over in Western Australia? Everything is fine here with myself and my family so far. I am, however, a teacher and a number of schools nearby have gone out over the last couple of weeks .. so I feel a bit like I have a target painted on my back. But, what can we do?

 

Everyone here has been super welcoming and my experience so far has been lovely.

 

Thank you so much for the warm welcome from a fellow Aussie girl.