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still in a bad situation at house


LaylaBarbz

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In May I finally came out to my mother, I was so confident at the time and finally was brave enough too take that big step in a turkish islamitic household...
After coming out, it all went downhill for me and I still do suffer from that.
My mom still continues to manipulate me to stay in the closet and have all control over me, she became a very narcissistic mom in such a short time...
Because of all these situation I became very very insecure about myself, I just want to start my transition so badly and be myself.
I always have discussions with my mom about being trans and my appereance etc...

I really want to get out of here, i want my own space and place but as an 18 year old student I don't know where to go... I do not want to end up on the streets...

I don't even dare to take the step to get out of home... I am afraid of seeking any help or advice because of her manipulations....

 

I really need advice ... what would you have done in my situation? : C What would be smart to do....

It has been months.... i gave her all the time she needs but she doesnt even wanna try to understand me :C
 

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1 hour ago, MaryMary said:

I would try to convince your mom to seek a gender therapist for you. I'm sure she have your health and well being at heart. Maybe you can convince her on the basis of needing help to go trough this. Once you can see a gender therapist maybe they can help you figuring out the next step keeping in mind the laws / resources and healthcare in the country in which you live. Maybe the gender therapist could also help you figuring out the next step while you are waiting for control of your own life. Gender dysphoria is a serious thing and should never be taken lightly. If your mother is afraid of the "scary" trans thing maybe you can convince her of the importance of treating and helping you with gender dysphoria. Sometimes it's as easy as giving you a blocker to push back puberty (or what is left of it) until you are old and financially independant enough. It will not be a transition but will help HRT have more effect when you will be able to decide yourself. Maybe this could be a compromise made with your mom? not transition but taken medication to stop puberty and a therapist to help you with gender dysphoria?

 

Good luck with all of this and if you ever feel like you are not well don't hesitate to rant and scream here at least. We will always be here to listen.

 Hey, thankyou for your comment.

I've already spoken with her about it.

She made me choose between her or being trans, she doesnt care about my wellbeing anymore. 
If I go ahead and do anything trans she will kick me out she swore.

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1 hour ago, LaylaBarbz said:

 Hey, thankyou for your comment.

I've already spoken with her about it.

She made me choose between her or being trans, she doesnt care about my wellbeing anymore. 
If I go ahead and do anything trans she will kick me out she swore.

I know it's hard but time is on your side.  You might want to consider the first part of transition to be transitioning into a self supporting adult so that you have the freedom to pursue the gender portion of transitioning.  You could also work on training your voice through online help while in private.  The point being, if you can find ways to move toward your goal, the dysphoria can often be reduced. Transitioning is a long process and part of that is developing support and putting yourself in the best place emotionally, physically and financially for the challenge.  This is a great time for that.  Good luck

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