AAAAAHHHHHHH!

[JustineM]

Ok now that I got that out of my system. The letter to my Mom went out today, she should get it in the next 2-3 days. I really don’t know how that one is going to go. Plan on talking to my Dad tomorrow evening. I don’t know if I will get much of a reaction out of him. But he is also older so I don’t know that he will ever call me anything but “son.”  I’m going to have to tell my brother this weekend as well. I would rather have him hear it from me than Mom, especially if she doesn’t take it well. 
 

Thank the Goddess I’m already on acid blockers or I would probably end up with ulcers later tonight, since I am it probably won’t happen until Monday lol.   I’ll keep this thread updated with how it goes. 

[tracy_j]

Good luck!

 

Tracy

[Audrey]

Dear Justine, I'm wishing you the best in coming out to your family this weekend. We'll be here to support you and eager to hear how everything goes.

 

Love,

~Audrey.

[JustineM]

Well I’m sitting here trying not to ugly cry. The calls to my Dad and brother went amazingly well. My brother said it didn’t bother him and he was glad I was taking steps to be happy. Dad almost immediately offered to help cover therapy and HRT med costs. Said he loved me and that would never change. He did say that he wouldn’t stop calling me his son, though given his age and the way he was raised I didn’t really expect him too. 

[Jackie C.]

That's great news @JustineM! I'm so happy your father and brother are supportive! I'd probably take Dad up on the offer to help out financially too. Anything he wants to put in, you can put towards saving up for the big ticket items.

 

Hugs!

[Audrey]

@JustineM I'm so happy to read that coming out to your father and brother were such positive experiences! You must feel wonderful after that, and it's great to hear about your father's generosity to support your journey too. I'm hopeful that your mother will receive her letter soon, and that she will also accept you.

 

Love,

~Audrey.

[Jani]

Sounds like it went much better than you expected.  Congratulations.

[JustineM]

I really thought that I would bouncing ecstatic today but I’m really not. I’m happy but the more overwhelming feeling has really been just a profound peace. More peace than I’ve felt for a long time. 

[Jani]

1 hour ago, JustineM said:

feeling has really been just a profound peace.

Its a relief.  Then life goes on.  This is really how it should be.  I'm happy for you. 

 

Jani

[JustineM]

Just a quickie update. Still waiting to hear from Mom, though given the weekend and holiday plus USPS current difficulties, she may not have even got the letter yet. One of my older sisters called me this morning and was asking about books she could read to help her understand better. So all in all not going to bad. 

[ElizabethStar]

I'm so happy for you Justine. I wish everyone could find that kind of peace in their lives. It's nice your sister is asking for resources to learn from. My family has decided to entrust their lives to google.

[Mmindy]

What a great read this morning @JustineM.

 

I'm happy to hear that you family is supporting you, and continue to pray that your mother will also be on board with you.

 

Peace is soothing, who knows, you may be dropping the daily antacids as life comes in line with your feelings.

 

Hugs,

 

Mindy

[Audrey]

Wonderful news about your family, Justine! I'm hopeful your mother will be just as supportive and loving when she receives her letter. The idea about books and resources to suggest to others has been on my mind as well, I may need some of them soon before the internet takes over that role for coworkers and family. Does anyone have any ideas? I'll check other threads here too.

 

Love,

~Audrey.

[Susan R]

16 hours ago, JustineM said:

One of my older sisters called me this morning and was asking about books she could read to help her understand better. So all in all not going to bad.

Wow, Justine. Looks very much like after some research and a few good conversations with her, you may have a trusted ally in your corner. Hopefully, you will find ‘easy to digest’ materials or videos for her to peruse. Someone who loves you enough to learn about what you’re going through is saying so much about your sister. Your relationship will change but sometimes change is required to get to that next level. I am so happy for you. Everyone needs a close ally during a journey like this. Maybe your sister will be yours!

 

My Best,

Susan R

[JustineM]

13 hours ago, Mmindy said:

Peace is soothing, who knows, you may be dropping the daily antacids as life comes in line with your feelings

I hope I can, I’ve been on some kind of stomach meds for darn near 20 years. 

 

13 hours ago, Audrey said:

Wonderful news about your family, Justine! I'm hopeful your mother will be just as supportive and loving when she receives her letter. The idea about books and resources to suggest to others has been on my mind as well, I may need some of them soon before the internet takes over that role for coworkers and family. Does anyone have any ideas? I'll check other threads here too.

 

Love,

~Audrey.

I suggested 2 that I found on Amazon to her, Transgender 101 by Nicholas Teich and Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Trans by Brynn Tannehill. 

[KayC]

On 1/17/2021 at 7:15 AM, JustineM said:

the more overwhelming feeling has really been just a profound peace. More peace than I’ve felt for a long time. 

That's so great to hear, Justine.  That's what we all want.
Happy its been going so well, and hoping the news is the same when you hear from your Mom

[JustineM]

Well the whirlwind week continues. Emailed my regional HR manager about talking to my boss. I had talked to her last year and she wanted me to let her know before saying anything so she was ready with any guidance needed.  Also got a call from my Dad, he asked if it was alright to still call me son and then kinda chewed on me for thinking he would love me any less for being trans. 
 

I’ve got to say, seeing some others stories and what they have, or are, going through makes me realize just how lucky I’ve been in this journey so far. 

[JustineM]

That was....... interesting. Mom finally text me this morning and told me she got my letter, wanted me to call her this evening. Finally got off work and called her about 8. Really got mostly a lack of any real reaction. She asked a couple questions and kinda tried to guilt-trip me over my wife and boys possibly leaving. (No they aren’t) And that was it.  I’m grateful that she didn’t blow up at me or anything but I really expected some kind of response.  It’s kinda got me a little concerned.

[Audrey]

@JustineM I'm relieved to hear that your mother didn't have a strong and immediate negative reaction either, after she received your letter. It's an encouraging sign that she asked you a few questions. Maybe she will just need time to process what she's read, and after she has, she might be ready to have more of a conversation with you. I do understand the concern about what her subdued response might mean. On the positive side though, it's wonderful to know that your wife and children are beside you, as well as your father, brother, and sister!

 

Love,

~Audrey.

[Princess-audra]

It is good to hear that there was no immediate bad reactions. Kind of give me a positive insight to when ever I come out.

[JustineM]

On a side note. Sitting here thinking I cannot wait to get on HRT and have my own breasts, not have to worry about breast forms. Lol

[JustineM]

Wow this year is just taking off like a rocket. I’m officially out to my boss and supervisors as of this morning. The conversation with my boss was a hot two minutes lol. Told I’m trans and that I’m pursuing starting a medical transition and his reply was alright let me know if you need something. And that was it. 
 

It’s kinda weird, last year I was SO careful and methodical about who I told and how. This year it just like “f it” I am going to get it out there and be freaking happy!

[Susan R]

1 hour ago, JustineM said:

It’s kinda weird, last year I was SO careful and methodical about who I told and how. This year it just like “f it” I am going to get it out there and be freaking happy!

@JustineM In my experience this is a totally normal reaction.

 

There was point early in my transition that I was using a local Church parking lot to remove my guy clothing, sunglasses, shoes, etc..that covered my female clothing underneath to attend doctor’s appts, support groups meetings, shopping, etc... Then I had to do the reverse to get back into my home that same day.

 

After 3 weeks of this madness, my wife and I said almost the same thing you did. That next week, we came out to everyone in my neighborhood and it made life so much easier. It just got to be too much work...especially after wanting to be myself in the real world more and more.

 

I think a lot of trans individuals develop that attitude realizing that it’s time to make some major changes just as you did. Congratulations on this next big step in your transition!!

 

My Best,

Susan R