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What piece of clothing makes you feel your correct gender?


Luna Gonzalez

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I love skirts or dresses (fairly long) and yes, with a slip.  I also love a shawl in cooler weather.  

Guess I'm kinda a throwback to an earlier age.  And knee high socks, yes!

 

Situations where I have to put on britches for practical reasons bother me.  (I have even had anxiety attacks about it)  

Lately I have gotten a little better about it, and did get some capris for when that was better in social situations.

 

A couple of days ago I was cleaning my chimney in a work dress.   I'm a bit crazy, I'll admit.

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On 9/2/2021 at 12:20 PM, JennaLSinclair said:

 

I'm 6'-2" (188 cm) tall, I stand out regardless. Heels don't bother me. I have a cis female cousin that's 6'-3" (191 cm) tall. We both love heels.

6" pumps are my style. I really don't care what I look like, whether dressed or walking, I love myself regardless.

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On 9/2/2021 at 9:48 AM, JennaLSinclair said:

Heels and a dress, hun. This girl loves looking her best wherever she goes. Only my stylist knows my true hair color! ?

Yup!!!   Anything fashionable makes me feel euphoria 

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  • 3 months later...

Yay!  Clothes!  And I actually can answer this without any hesitation.  It's a denim skirt I found in a thrift store when I was visiting my partner.  Goes all the way to my ankles.  It drags a bit if I'm not wearing my boots.  They've got the lift from having heels.  It's quite dark and the waist is just a smidge elastic.  It can go with just about any outfit I want to throw together from my limited (for the moment) wardrobe.  Looking at the wardrobe as it is, I feel it's the most overtly feminine article of clothing I have.  I have two other skirts, but the denim one is more versatile and stands up to a greater variety of situations.  It has the "Lynn Seal of Approval."  If you pull out a bit though, and just look at long skirts in general, I feel like more than my thoughts about them, it makes it easier for people to gender me correctly.  I mean, here all of us know that clothing isn't really one thing or another, but the reality is, the majority of people tie their perceptions to certain cues.  Skirts definitely fall under things a woman wears to most people.

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I don't have clothes that make me feel my "correct" gender.  My identity is who I am, not what I wear.  I wear unisex work shoes, and usually somewhat baggy 'men's' pants.  I prefer the fit of 'men's' pants over 'women's' pants, especially for work.  I rarely wear a dress as I don't go anywhere that it would be the most appropriate attire.  I often wear men's shirts for work as well.  It just depends on what clean one I happen to grab.  A lot of people say I dress like the stereotypical lesbian, which is fine, since I am a very out and proud Trans Lesbian.  Nothing that I wear makes me feel any more or less like the queer woman I am.

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Boxers! Changing my underwear from female briefs to boxers made so much difference for me. I’m not out to anyone yet as a trans man, but knowing that I’m wearing boxers under my jeans makes me stand a little straighter and feel much more myself. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Interesting question! At first panties and bras were incredibly affirming, but now I don't notice them. Except I feel very dysphoric when I don't wear them.

 

I do love new clothes that accentuate or reveal feminine features of my body. While they are not pronounced, there are some now that Estradiol and low testosterone have had some effect.

 

But it's mostly the relief of seeing how I feel on the inside reflected, at least in part, in the mirror.

 

On days when I don't present as female, rare now that I am out at work and elsewhere, little things like cute socks and clothes that are not visible keep the hounds of dysphoria at bay.

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For me, it's being able to dress in "nicer" outfits; ie: either a nice skirt, blouse and heels or dress trousers and a nice sweater. again coupled with heels or boots. Sort of like you would wear to the office or out for a drink with friends. I find it very affirming to dress as the correct gender. I also love dangly earrings or big hoops. Not exactly clothing, but since I got my ears pierced, earrings and jewelry have become more and more important.

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Cute jewelry and cute shoes for me! Shoes, because even though I wore a size 10 1/2 mens (translates to a size 11  - and sometimes size 12 womens) my big feet look and feel (to me) LESS huge and certainly more feminine. Jewelry, because, well - what girl doesn't like cute jewelry in some form or fashion? I probably have less jewelry than a lot of women, because it's one thing I won't "cheap out" on. I prefer higher quality (gold, silver, turquoise, onyx, etc.) - which means I usually have to save up a few dollars here and there until I can buy something nice.

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I am not a big fan of dresses: I don't think they flatter my (*ahem*) figure. 

 

But I love wearing skirts, the swishier, the better.  Colourful, flowery tops.  I will wear slacks or skinny jeans if I have a nice top to go with them.  Jewelery: I have to have something sparkly.  I always wear my wedding ring, but I put on a couple more rings when I go out.  A necklace if the top permits it.  Always earrings!  I have a default pair of silver studs that I put on when I get up in the morning and take off when I go to bed.  When I go out, I will change them for something a bit more glamourous: coloured studs or something dangly.

 

My rule of thumb is that I will not wear anything that a guy might wear unless I am working on the car or making sawdust.

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3 minutes ago, KathyLauren said:

My rule of thumb is that I will not wear anything that a guy might wear unless I am working on the car or making sawdust.

That's a GREAT rule of thumb, @KathyLauren!💜

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15 hours ago, KathyLauren said:

My rule of thumb is that I will not wear anything that a guy might wear unless I am working on the car or making sawdust.

This is pretty much me as well.  

 

I really dislike "britches."  I do have some capris that I can wear with tunic-tops or similar for those times (seldom) when it seems more appropriate.

 

While women's clothes have never been a sexual thing for me, the euphoria I felt when I first got up the nerve to put on a skirt was instrumental in cracking my egg.  

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I mentioned earlier that shoes and jewelry are important - but when I first slip on a cute pair of lace panties in the morning, I immediately feel calm and feminine!

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I have been overlooking the obvious but recently the lightweight flowery spring dresses and wrap dress in getting ready for springtime has been doing it for me. Suprisingly, my tastes are changing.

I think maybe because I was enby for so long. Very feminine, versatile and even though I have not grown into a big girl yet ;) , will be putting them in heavy rotation.

Shoes are vibey too.

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I mentioned in an earlier post that wearing a slip made me feel so right, but having now being full time  for sometime all my clothes are women's clothes and I just consider them my clothes. But on occasion when it calls for me to really get dressed up I love the feeling of really being put together.the proper foundation garments{even the Spanx} a nice slip, and the dress, and shoes, and jewelry just feel right .That was never how putting on a boring suit ,and tie ever felt right. So when I am put together I have that feeling of being my real self out in the world, hope that makes sense.

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9 minutes ago, claire1000 said:

So when I am put together I have that feeling of being my real self out in the world, hope that makes sense.

@claire1000, that makes perfect sense!

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3 hours ago, claire1000 said:

 So when I am put together I have that feeling of being my real self out in the world, hope that makes sense.

Can I just say your comment both makes perfect sense to me (wearing the right clothes makes me FEEL right and like I’m being my real self, too), while simultaneously being completely alien to me?
 

I was AFAB, but never felt this way about feminine clothes. The last time I wore a skirt, I was about 15 and did it on a dare (with tracksuit pants underneath!); I last wore a dress at age 12 (forced to by a school uniform code, after not having worn one as long as I could remember); I’ve literally never worn make up or been drawn to jewellery; I’ve had short hair in a boyish cut since I was finally allowed to get it cut that way at age 10. 
 

I’m in my 40s now, and it’s taken me decades to figure out what my childhood self had such a firm, intuitive grasp on.  Makes me wonder where we’d all be today if we’d grown up in a society that let kids freely explore and express their own gender identities. 
 

Anyway, I think it’s wonderful that the clothes you’re choosing for yourself now bring you so much joy :) 

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2 hours ago, HarryT said:

Makes me wonder where we’d all be today if we’d grown up in a society that let kids freely explore and express their own gender identities. 

Wouldn't that have been wonderful! Hopefully future generations have the freedoms we only dreamed about...

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AFAB hate skirts, closest thing I'll except is a Kilt or Kaftan. Mostly keep to wearing Boxers/briefs/commando, baggie shirts/pants, worker boots.

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Hi I’m trying to switch from guy mode to girl mode slowly everyday, bra top and thong under a striped girly T or baggy shirt or jumper and skinny jeans. Hope to get a bit braver soon 

hugs Stefi 

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Button-up dress shirts! I got a light blue one with roses all over it recently and I love it to bits. It looks great with my mom jeans and sneakers, and they make me feel good. And jumpsuits, I love jumpsuits.

But mostly I wear gag t-shirts and exercise shorts or cotton pants. They feel good too. Super feminine dresses or v-neck shirts are a no go because I feel like they draw more attention to my chest, which is why I wear crew necks or button-ups. And skirts have to be below the knee or I'm not wearing them.

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Dresses are fun! I especially like it when I shake and the bottom swishes. If you live by yourself or want to experiment at home, you can order a dress online from Amazon or Zulily. I recommend LuLaRoe dresses, as they're really comfy and come in a wide array of styles. They are a bit pricey and it seems the company is going through some legal trouble over the past couple of years, so be mindful. 

If dresses aren't on the table for whatever reason, a skirt is the next best choice. Except if you want the bottom to be swishy you need to buy one that's below the knee and looser at the bottom. They're a good substitute. 

Another option is leggings. Leggings tend to make me feel more feminine, which is why I don't wear them as often, but it might make you feel more feminine too! As an extra bonus, get ones with flowers or other pretty patterns for maximum effect!

Hope this helps, Stefi!

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