Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Coming out at reunion


heatherd

Recommended Posts

Coming out at my 10 year high school reunion,I was very nervous and luckily had my twin brother for support.Classmates and teachers I had,they wondered what happened to us.Remember walking in and came out that I transitioned.Classmates I knew accepted the change,saw I was unhappy at times now living a much happier life.Also from teachers.I was picked on a lot in high school.The bullies that did it to me,apologized to me knowing what they did was wrong calling me Heather.The classmates that hated me for some reason,turned their back on me even more.I did not let this hold me back knowing the teachers I had and the classmates I knew well cared about me a lot.

Link to comment

It sounds like you are in a lot healthier place than I am in relation to this sort of thing.  I now understand why I went though what I did, but I will never forgive anyone I went to high school with for what they put me through.  I left high school in Dec-1986 and have ignored all attempts (bar one) people from my classes have made to get in touch with me since that time.  The one I did respond to came from a woman who sounds like she may not have much longer to live - she's just been released from hospital after 87 nights spent there.

Link to comment
  • Admin

You should feel pride, @heatherd, at having the courage to come out to classmates and attend your reunion. I'm glad it went well for you.

 

For my 40th, ten years ago, I contacted three classmates whose contact info I had.  Two wanted nothing to do with me, and the third was non-committal.  With that reaction I decided not to attend.  I had planned to attend it last summer (the 50th), but there was almost no one I knew on the guest list, so I didn't attend.

 

Carolyn Marie

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
On 12/19/2022 at 7:56 PM, heatherd said:

Coming out at my 10 year high school reunion,I was very nervous and luckily had my twin brother for support.

Congratulations @heatherd on taking that positive step. It’s wonderful to read this. It wouldve been so easy to come up with reasons to avoid going but you didn’t let any of that kind of thinking get the best of you. As Carolyn Marie said, you should be very proud of yourself.😁

 

15 hours ago, Hannah Renee said:

I did receive a letter from one woman who was trying to help me, Christian to Christian. I do not resent her for sending it. I know where her heart is. Nevertheless, some of the words stung a bit, simply because she cannot possibly know or understand the entirety of my life's experience.

@Hannah Renee, I’m so sorry you had to read such a thing. As you know, her words were coming from a place of ignorance and misunderstanding. If they could live in our shoes for even a short time, only then might their eyes be opened to our truth.

 

One of my wife’s good friends from church recently did something very similar. Back in 2019, our church was informed of my transition. My wife’s best friend from that church went to lunch with us and we told her everything to clear the air. At that time, she seemed stunned but ok with my transition. She remained friends with my wife ever since during these past 3+ years.

 

In late October, the day before my wife and I flew to Spokane for my final surgery, she came over with a gift basket for our trip. Inside the basket was a hidden 7 page letter consisting of the same painful content as the letter you received. My wife found it before I saw it and spared me the details until after returning home from my surgery. Needless to say, her friendship with her church friend ended. I still have not read the letter. I’m not sure I ever will.

Link to comment

ah yes, the gaslighting disguised as concern... It's amazing how much someone can make your life story all about how it impacts them.

@heatherd Good for you on going as yourself! Great that your twin was there too. 🙂

Though I confess I don't understand the concept of school reunions. I couldn't think of anything more cringe than going to a party full of the people I went to school with - if I haven't kept in touch it was for a reason!

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   10 Members, 0 Anonymous, 188 Guests (See full list)

    • AllieJ
    • KatieSC
    • Davie
    • Ladypcnj
    • Ashley0616
    • April Marie
    • Adrianna Danielle
    • Betty K
    • KathyLauren
    • Heather Shay
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.8k
    • Total Posts
      769.8k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,082
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Amberoni
    Newest Member
    Amberoni
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Alex2022
      Alex2022
      (20 years old)
    2. cvincent
      cvincent
      (69 years old)
    3. Demorriana
      Demorriana
      (25 years old)
    4. forbiddenforest
      forbiddenforest
      (26 years old)
    5. LoganXB
      LoganXB
  • Posts

    • Davie
      Cool. We had none in Boston, but my sister-in-law took this on an island near Seattle,  
    • Davie
      Cool. We had none in Boston, but my sister-in-law took this on an island near Seattle,
    • Heather Shay
    • Willow
      Good morning    Work day today, no pool time, and no dress.  Just a uniform top and slacks.   Thank you for asking about my wife, @Ashley0616 , she is improving all the time and getting anxious to be rid of the med vac.  She keeps telling people a couple mor weeks be even with the speed at which she is recovering, I think that is more wishful than reality.   i received both compliments about my dress as well as my ability to speak before the congregation.  My little frog was right there with me but then he is a permanent resident in my voice.  Some days worse than others and I never know until I start speaking.  Maybe I need a frog exorcism.  Oh our church doesn’t do that.  Shucks.   well the humidity is coming back today along with possible rain and warmer weather.   I guess a lot of you are getting hit with smoke from Canada again this year. I recall last year you could see and smell it here.  It a shame to loose so many trees when we need them for climate control.  I was surprised to learn the South Carolina was the largest producer of wood in the states. We have a great deal of wet and swamp land that the plant and harvest and plant again.  While some makes it to the mills to become construction material, mose goes to one of several paper mills.  Those trees are clear cut and trucked to the mills to be cleaned mulched and processed along with recycled paper.the closest mill to here makes brown board which become packaging material like corrugated cardboard.   i guess we have rather ideal conditions for southern pine tree growing.  That along with cotton, rice indigo, tobacco and cash food crops fruits and vegitables and pecans, can’t forget the nuts.  You can take that more than one way and be right.   enjoy you day whether at work or at play.   Willow
    • Heather Shay
      Have you set any summer plans yet?
    • MirandaB
      I wasn't really aware of an emotional roller coaster possiblity when I started.    A few days in I realized i had been living with some tension that I was able to ignore until it went away. One morning it was just 'why I do I feel better than usual'?   So I googled around and found that it was possible to have such a result, I was thinking it would just take time for physical effects to work on my emotions.   Some talk about finally being able to cry, I have always been an excellent crier, so on HRT I cry REALLY hard.   But laughing was never really that easy for me, and now I laugh out loud way more often. Love that part of the roller coaster. 
    • Heather Shay
      Met dear friend felt in heaven.
    • Heather Shay
      Satisfaction Satisfaction. The feeling when something meets or exceeds your expectation. You feel satisfaction when you expected to get something, and then got it.
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
    • Lydia_R
      Well, for me, on day one is was like, wow, I feel more relaxed.  Then every day after that was more of the same.  YMMV.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Groupings are easy for news material.  And in many nations, we live in a society that doesn't read in-depth.  There are always a few members of any group that can give it a bad name.  Pedophile priests undermined trust in the Catholic Church.  NAMBLA taints the reputation of LGBTQ+ folks....although since this thread is about Australia, I'm not sure it is very relevant.    Is it ignorance?  Perhaps.  But I think what is often labeled as ignorance is really just a different interpretation of the same facts, and different weight placed on portions of the evidence.  We also live in a time when satire and criticism aren't particularly acceptable or understood by all.   https://nypost.com/2023/06/24/drag-marchers-spark-outrage-with-chant-at-nyc-pride-event-were-here-were-queer-and-were-coming-for-your-children/   ^^^ This was meant sort of tongue-in-cheek, but wasn't helpful.    Like it or not, to many people this is "confirmation" of beliefs, not humor.  And in an era where language is changing and people often get confrontational and angry about minor aspects of language, it seems absurd to believe that there wouldn't be some sort of backlash over trying to label pedophiles as "Minor Attracted Persons."    While I don't agree with the idea that "LGBTQ = pedophile" I can understand how folks might think that was the case.   
    • Lydia_R
      Hello @FelixThePickleMan!  I second this breaking the cycle idea.  And the idea of getting some help to do it.  I was pushed into a treatment program in high school for marijuana addiction and because I went into it with an open mind, I was able to break the cycle by latching onto some of the literature.  It didn't keep me sober for the rest of my life, but helped a ton and was the only time I went through treatment.   I found marijuana to be fun and productive when practicing music.  At least for a while.  I can't imagine my life without the influence of it, but it would have been better to give it up a little sooner.  Drinking in the military was terrible for me, but it was good to be off of the marijuana during that time.  I didn't start drinking until I was about a year into the military.  I was trying really hard to avoid that, but there are a lot of people drinking in the military.  Be careful and love yourself!  Enjoy the journey too.   Smoking is bad for the lungs and will constrict your arteries as you get older.  It's best to put some limits on these things!  It's hard work, but worth the effort!  I found myself avoiding recovery meetings and doing recovery on my own for decades only to find myself going to meetings to enjoy being with others when I was older.  LOL!  Silly humans....   Hugs, Lydia
    • JessicaMW
      Starting HRT this week (the estradiol patches were out of stock at my pharmacy last week). It's obviously a big first step in my transition and one that has been long delayed by my initially unaccepting wife (who now has dropped her opposition). My biggest initial apprehension is the much talked about emotional roller coaster in the next few months. Something that my endocrinologist also mentioned as a possibility (probability??). How troublesome will it likely be? Will this be me soon:  
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...