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I think its time for a new therapist.


Red_Lauren.

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I have been seen my guy since the beginning of April. He's nice, and we click, but I have been noticing a few things lately. 

 

1. I no longer want to go. 

2. I'm in worst shape then I was before.

3. If I bring up things. He'll chnage the topic.

4. I noticed he was falling asleep lately. 

 

When I started therapy in April. I went in with open arms. I believed this this would help me. I noticed over the last month or so. I would mention my depression, suicidal thoughts, and eating disorder, and he would chnage the subject, or as long as im not hurting my self I'm fine. That had beyond pissed me off. Like I'm paying for help and I get told that. The last few weeks I have noticed him fighting to stay awake also. Again that pisses me off royally 

 

I went in to deal with demons, and to figure out how to deal with them, and yet. Here I am trying to figure out how to deal with them alone again. 

 

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  • Admin

You do have to have confidence in your Therapist for it to be of value.  If you have no confidence then it is time to move on.

 

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If I were you I would absolutely dump that therapist. Unless he was the only one I could get to and I was dependent on him for some other reason (like providing a hormone letter if that is still a necessary requirement to get hormones, etc).

 

Falling asleep during a session is beyond unprofessional! And it can sure be difficult to find a decent therapist in the first place. What I really disliked when I was seeing them were those therapists that would accept trans patients like me, but really had no clue what they were doing/had zero trans experience and I ended up having to educate them along the way. In order to have any hope of getting something positive out of it. Unless I gave up and tried again with somebody else, which gets old in a hurry.

 

At least nowadays the stigma of being trans is not what it once was in the recent past concerning the mental health profession. This was back when trans people were treated as perverted and diseased, the same approach they took to lesbians & gays as well. And that is exactly how I was treated when I tried counseling the very first time. Like being slapped in the face and reinforcing every negative stereotype there was. Made me feel awful about myself, like I was a complete freak. Was quite a long time before I ever tried counseling again. But I did. And I am very glad now that I did.

 

Unfortunately sometimes, therapists are necessary. Consider trying to find a better one.

 

Coincidentally I had developed an eating disorder myself. It gradually vanished after I got SRS, although that may not have had anything to do with it.

 

Hope things work out...    

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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20 minutes ago, VickySGV said:

You do have to have confidence in your Therapist for it to be of value.  If you have no confidence then it is time to move on.

 

Yea im cutting him lose Monday. I won't have the time Tomorrow before work. 

11 minutes ago, Kristen Sehr said:

If I were you I would absolutely dump that therapist. Unless he was the only one I could get to and I was dependent on him for some other reason (like providing a hormone letter if that is still a necessary requirement to get hormones, etc).

 

Falling asleep during a session is beyond unprofessional! And it can sure be difficult to find a decent therapist in the first place. What I really disliked when I was seeing them were those therapists that would accept trans patients like me, but really had no clue what they were doing/had zero trans experience and I ended up having to educate them along the way. In order to have any hope of getting something positive out of it. Unless I gave up and tried again with somebody else, which gets old in a hurry.

 

At least nowadays the stigma of being trans is not what it once was in the recent past concerning the mental health profession. This was back when trans people were treated as perverted and diseased, the same approach they took to lesbians & gays as well. And that is exactly how I was treated when I tried counseling the very first time. Like being slapped in the face and reinforcing every negative stereotype there was. Made me feel awful about myself, like I was a complete freak. Was quite a long time before I ever tried counseling again. But I did. And I am very glad now that I did.

 

Unfortunately sometimes, therapists are necessary. Consider trying to find a better one.

 

Coincidentally I had developed an eating disorder myself. It gradually vanished after I got SRS, although that may not have had anything to do with it.

 

Hope things work out...    

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thankfully I've been on hrt for two and a half year's now. I went to therapy to deal my demons first, snd to help get surgery letters second. 

 

When I mentioned my dysphoria about a month ago it referred me to some one else. Not even in his company. There is some one in his company I was told to go by like 3 people. To help deal with my demons, and gender dysphoria stuff, but she needs a referral first now. 

 

He was Hosntest. When he told me he dosnt deal with trans stuff, and I think I'm over his head with the demons stuff. He's ok with trans and gay people, but after all that. I was like I'm wasting my time. 

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13 minutes ago, Red_Lauren. said:

Yea im cutting him lose Monday. I won't have the time Tomorrow before work. 

Thankfully I've been on hrt for two and a half year's now. I went to therapy to deal my demons first, snd to help get surgery letters second. 

 

When I mentioned my dysphoria about a month ago it referred me to some one else. Not even in his company. There is some one in his company I was told to go by like 3 people. To help deal with my demons, and gender dysphoria stuff, but she needs a referral first now. 

 

He was Hosntest. When he told me he dosnt deal with trans stuff, and I think I'm over his head with the demons stuff. He's ok with trans and gay people, but after all that. I was like I'm wasting my time. 

 

Sounds like a good plan, working on those demons first. Because they can make everything else harder. And needing a referral first? Regrettable because nothing should be standing in the way of your health. At least the insurance I had in those days (when I was in counseling) did not require a referral. And the therapist I finally connected with that helped me the most, when my insurance stopped paying (they would only pay for a limited number of sessions) I scraped up the money to keep on seeing him. He was FtM trans himself and really understood. He has since retired...

 

On the other hand, if by way of a referral you wind up with a caring and truly professional therapist that can really help, then it will be worth it in the end.  

 

 

 

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9 minutes ago, Kristen Sehr said:

 

Sounds like a good plan, working on those demons first. Because they can make everything else harder. And needing a referral first? Regrettable because nothing should be standing in the way of your health. At least the insurance I had in those days (when I was in counseling) did not require a referral. And the therapist I finally connected with that helped me the most, when my insurance stopped paying (they would only pay for a limited number of sessions) I scraped up the money to keep on seeing him. He was FtM trans himself and really understood. He has since retired...

 

On the other hand, if by way of a referral you wind up with a caring and truly professional therapist that can really help, then it will be worth it in the end.  

 

 

 

I have what ever state insurance wi has. As I found out trying to find a therapists. Not a lot of places will take it. Because they are losing money. As for the referral. She has a lot of clients her self, so that could be why

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  • 1 year later...

Hi, newbie here. Been to 3 therapists. My new one is the best. 2nd one was the worst so I'm glad I stopped with her. I support the idea of dealing with your demons as well as discussing dysphoria. I told my new therapist that I need to focus on my anxiety and depression, and my repression/resistance to any inkling of dysphoria. I consider dealing with that to be key. I may discover I am full-on binary female, or I may discover I am some form of nonbinary. I'm good with either diagnosis. Negativity clouds your thinking skills and could interfere with that. Dealing with the whole of myself is the best way forward and I recommend it to everyone. Good luck! :)

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