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NEW DAILY REQUEST THREAD: Plant a good seed of hope for others


Heather Shay

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Tell someone they are special.

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Give of yourself and all your wonderful gifts.

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Make someone laugh a hearty laugh

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Remind someone today that they are unique, special and the only one of them EVER was, is, or will be. 

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Reach out to someone hurting.

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Always encourage other with the following:

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Let someone know they are loved.

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Listen - maybe someone is asking for help - don't be too busy that you don't notice.

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Give lifting words and you will be lifted as well.

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Tell a joke - make someone laugh. It's good for them and you.

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Keep communicating with them. People are like icebergs you can only see the surface, but it goes much deeper than that. They only will let you know what they want to tell you.

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give the following advice to someone"

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Smile and laugh often. Don't be afraid to put yourself first sometimes. Self-love is important too!

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Remember to tell those you love that you do in fact love them, IN WORDS.

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Self-love is just as important as loving others. In order to love others, you must first love yourself. Don't look for happiness in someone else. You will never find it. Others can provide adding to the joy that you have for yourself. 

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Being independent or self-sufficient is not necessarily a life requirement.  Its OK to need others. 

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Encourage others to be themselves always.

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Listen when someone needs a shoulder to cry on - don't give advice - just listen.

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Even if you don't feel like it, when someone asks for help, help them.

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Everyone is not only just looking on how you handle the good and easy times but also how you measure up to the hard times. Be an example for others to follow. 

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  • Posts

    • HeatherK
      Hi, thanks. Yes I'm scared to look into someone's eyes and admit I'm a transgender woman. I've had this macho persona for a long time and I'm afraid of being in a vulnerable place. Pretty sure I'll be OK admitting to someone who themself identifies as LGBTQIA2S+
    • Nats
      @emeraldmountain2 I'd stick it out with what you know unless you're a very experienced independent traveller (I don't mean vacations).    It's a huge risk, even if you could do it, and in your place I'd try to do my tiny bit to get a decent Opponent for the next one, and work like hell to get the Republicans out.  But I wouldn't move to a foreign country unless he 'does a Putin' and locks up all his opponents or cancels the next election or something.  Which sounds far fetched but which I recognise as unlikely, but possible.      
    • KathyLauren
      Trust me, hon, you would not be the first person with a male voice that has told them that they are a transgender woman.  I did shave off my beard before I saw my therapist for the first time, but I presented as a male, with my masculine name, and masculine voice for the first few times.   I realize it is scary to talk about this with a stranger for the first time, but you can do it.  All the better if you have already been practising a female voice.   I am sorry that things are not working out on the marriage front.  Hopefully, if you part, it can be on good terms.
    • rhonda74
      My treating doctors from long ago, couldn't figure out why I was menstruating. Things at home got to the point my parents couldn't no longer afford the medical expenses of keep driving me back to the hospital emergency room for more physical exams. 
    • HeatherK
      Hi, all 3 of you have given me good sound advice.Thank you!! I won't take anymore of those pills. Thank you for caring about my well-being!! I got cold feet about calling the therapist today. I've been practicing finding my feminine voice and when i hit the right timbre i feel so happy hearing Heather speak. I still need alot more practice before i feel comfortable speaking. I feel odd calling a therapist telling them I'm transgender in a male's voice.  I guess I need to get over my fear and make the call. I had the number up and ready to dial but didn't do it. But I know I need to see one and get all this stuff I've been suppressing for so long out. I'm assuming it will be a huge relief. I really feel that our marriage is over. Like I said before she won't accept me as Heather. 
    • Willow
      Officially we had 4-5 inches of white crap.  Then some sleet which made it crusted in ice.  Tonight the temperature is dropping into the teens so everything is refreezing.  Global warming?  Or just a periodic weather change?
    • Ivy
      What is happening to us is only one part of what is going on here.  We are watching a right-wing takeover of the government.  All of this has been thought out and planned for the last few years, probably longer.  They even wrote a book about it, going into detail of how to implement it.  They have a blueprint to follow, and they will.   Even any mention of us is being removed from government documents.  Books removed from libraries, teachers forbidden to even mention us.  Why?     I'm going to stop now because this is not only a trans issue.  We're mostly collateral damage for these people.
    • CairennTairisiu
      @EasyE   This video explains injection angles fairly well.   And this video provides a demonstration of subcutaneous injections.    
    • Troi
      I like that. In my case I would say I'm too old to wait for another person's life to end by natural causes to give up my transition.   Regardless of what orange man does or how many executive orders he signs, this is happening. I will be the person I've always felt deep down that I truly am. That said, I'm not even on HRT yet so I present cis, I know I'm a trans woman, but I would never go into a woman's restroom at this stage in my transition... heck, I don't even know if I'll ever pass to a point where I'd feel comfortable doing that. When I look at myself in the mirror, I think it'd be a tough sell but time and treatment will tell, but even then... I still might hold it until I can find a unisex restroom or make my way home.   Also, why aren't all restrooms unisex? I've been to Europe, almost all of them are there. It's so simple, get rid of the urinals and just put stalls everywhere. When I was in Germany, I was like yeah, this is how to do a restroom, stalls had doors, real doors that came down to the floor that closed with no gaps that creepy people can peak through. In a situation like that it doesn't matter who's in the stall next to you or who's waiting in line, it's just a restroom...    Anyway, I kinda digressed there. My point is I've never felt that I've had trans people forced upon me, ever, and I'm bleeping OLD yo. I also don't think this EO is really a result of others feeling like that as much as it is a result of this inertia on the right to go further and further right, on all things. Be it trans issues, gay marriage, abortion, religion, immigration, economics, geopolitics, everything, the right has become more and more bigoted, transphobic, homophobic, xenophobic, isolationist and I'll say it, racist over the last decade and a half and it's sad. As to why? Well, I hate to say it but I think it all starts with the racism. This country is at a tipping point where we will soon become a white minority country and the creaky old men in DC and their creaky old constitutes around the country are freaking the eff out. They're scared, they feel like this country belongs to them and them only, so yeah, that fear and hatred grows and expands so here we are. Start hating one group, start blaming one group for your personal misfortune and sooner or later you'll start adding more. Give it enough time on this path and we'll be back to the French, Irish, and Italians hating each other so much they'll try and pass laws to limit immigration from each other's country which has happened before.   IDK, that's my hypothesis on how we got here. I could be wrong, probably am.              
    • AnnMarie
      Well, I think you miss my point a bit, I should have said "perceived ramroddedness". That's the label we have now. 
    • Nats
      Heather, as others have said please don't take anything without professional clinical advice, that's not the way to go.   Also please persist with seeking some therapy or counselling.  It seems to me that you need to separate your intense emotional state about your marriage from your (doubtless equally intense) emotional state about your gender identity.  But you need to do that with someone qualified.   Talk to someone, sweetheart, and don't make decisions in this state.  Your distress is obvious and heartrending - but you presumably came here for the site's support and advice, so please listen to what @Carolyn Marie and @KathyLauren say.        
    • KathyLauren
      Hi, Heather.  I hope that you and your wife can find your way forward with the minimum of pain.     You are wise to consider whether or not it is smart to do that.  I would say not, for a couple of reasons.  First of all, hormones are serious, strong medications, and should only be used under the supervision of a doctor.  You need to have your blood hormone levels monitored regularly so that the dosage can be adjusted to what is right for you.  Secondly, Premarin is an outdated form of estrogen, with some serious health risks of its own.  There are better forms of bio-identical estrogen that are much safer to take.  
    • Carolyn Marie
      Heather, I'm sorry that you are going through this stressful, emotional turmoil with your wife.  I hope that the two of you can find some level of understanding so that things don't escalate.  I can see that you are ready to start your journey, but I urge you not to take any HRT medications without advice of an experienced endocrinologist or other physician.  I also urge you to find a good gender therapist to help you through this period of time.   HUGS   Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      Welcome to Transgender Pulse, Troi.  I hope that you find a lot of useful information in these forums.  I know you'll find a lot of great people here.  Please let us know how we can help.   HUGS   Carolyn Marie
    • VickySGV
      @AnnMarie As an active member of the Trans Community for nearly 20 years here in So. Cal. I have direct knowledge of only two actual examples of what you describe, and in both of those examples the person was NOT Trans.  One was a registered sex offender who was quickly arrested on violations of their parole.  The second example was best described as an agent provocateur who was literally a card carrying member of an organization whose mission is to defame us and that person was tried, found NOT Trans, and convicted on normal trespassing and sexual annoyance charges.   Another incident down in your personal area involved a MANY years post GCS Trans woman activist in a welcoming swimming environment, who was shouted out by a person who came into the area ONLY for the purpose of creating trouble and to see a Trans person IRL.  It was proven that the "witness" to the exhibitionism charge did not see what they claimed to have seen. (Medical records)   In a nutshell, they were lying and not because the Trans object of their fantasy in any way "ramrodded" their presence into the liar's life. Our status in LAW has been the work of long and considerable debate, research, and eventually consensus in the rightness of the bills that give us public status.  I have met and spoken with legislators involved in those things and in public records of their debate can see how it went that way.  Certainly those who are immovable in their sensitivities and moralizations will not see the amount of work and reason of people of good will as long as they live but the work has been done.  I am old enough that I cannot wait for another person's life to end by natural causes to give up my activism.
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