The Actor

[Guest interalia]

This is a poem I wrote many many years ago expressing my dissatisfaction with my life and how I always had to hide who I was. This was a time when the pendulum was pulled to its height as I desperately tried to prevent anyone from knowing how I really felt inside. Though the pendulum is no longer so strained, this poem still represents my feelings that I can never fully be myself for fear of how I will affect others close to me who are used to me as I am.

The Actor

Alone and sad I'm locked away

Far deep within the darkest cell:

A prison with no walls or chains,

Within my mind a living hell.

Perceptions of the world pass by;

I watch them from my mental cage,

But barred away from taking part

I let an actor take my stage.

He lives the life I've never known.

With him I can't identify.

The world accepts what they don't know

Is nothing but a living lie.

Because of him I can't be free,

And none can see that I exist,

But to remove him from his place

Is something that I dare not risk.

He lives a life that's not his own.

To take it is to kill the man.

And though he never should have lived,

Just who am I to say I can?

'cause though I might be fin'lly free,

It is not worth the risk I fear

To cause such pain to come about

And kill one others hold so dear.

For even if I showed the truth,

I fear that they will just not see

The man I killed to show myself

Was really never truly me.

I long to die but wish to live,

But trapped and buried I must stay

To save the sorrow caused to some

And let them love the lie I made.

inter alia

[Guest Joe Cool]

This is a powerful poem. I think it describes how a lot of us feel. Thanks for sharing this!

Joe

[Guest interalia]

Thank you for reading it.