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The Turtle And The Snail

Guest ~Nikki~

By Guest ~Nikki~,
in Jokes and Humor

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Guest ~Nikki~

Guest ~Nikki~

Posted
Posted

What did the snail say as she rode the turtles back?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeee this is fast....................................

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Guest Elizabeth K

Guest Elizabeth K

Posted
Posted

Glad to see you are both coming out of your shell.

What do you get when you cross a turtle with a porcupine?

A slow-poke

Grin

Lizzy

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Sally Gold Member

Sally

Posted
Posted
"Behold the turtle. He only makes progress when he sticks his neck out."

I had a little sister in the band sorority - no I was in the fraternity - who gave me a small terra cota turtle wearing a hat with little dried flowers in it and it had that slogan on the base.

I hadn't thought about that in almost thirty years, I wonder where it is now?

What do you get when you cross a parrot with a Gorilla?

I don't know, but when it talks you'd better listen!

Love ya,

Sally

PS If it asks for a banana or a cracker just give it to him!

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Guest Zabrak

Guest Zabrak

Posted
Posted
LOL!! :lol:

If a turtle loses it's shell, is it homeless or just naked? :o:huh::P

Joe

When a turtle looses its shell it dies. Its inners are connected to it....

... :D

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Guest Joe Cool

Guest Joe Cool

Posted
Posted
When a turtle looses its shell it dies. Its inners are connected to it....

... :D

:( That makes it very not funny. My bad...

Joe

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Guest Naomi Stardust

Guest Naomi Stardust

Posted
Posted

a turtle a snail and a sloth walked into a bar

the bartender looked up and said

"oh great! looks like its going to be another slow day!"

:P

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Sally Gold Member

Sally

Posted
Posted
a turtle a snail and a sloth walked into a bar

I bet they ordered Sloe Gin!

Love ya,

Sally

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Sally Gold Member

Sally

Posted
Posted

Does that go with the turtle soup that Zabrak was making?

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest Donna Jean

Guest Donna Jean

Posted
Posted

A snail is at the police station. He's telling the officer on duty about how he was just mugged and robbed.

"It was these two turtles!", the snail sobs. "They beat me up and took my money!

"The officer asks, "Did you get a good look at them?"

The snail says, "No! It all happened so fast!"

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Donna Jean

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Sally Gold Member

Sally

Posted
Posted

Any time you give a sweater to a turtle, be sure it is a mock turtle neck!

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest Elizabeth K

Guest Elizabeth K

Posted
Posted

Ya'll tortoise some new jokes - great!

There was a terrible road accident today between a van full of tortoises and a van full of terrapins.

It was a turtle disaster.

Lizzy

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Guest Joe Cool

Guest Joe Cool

Posted
Posted

A little boy came home from Sunday School and told his mother he had learned The Praire Tortoise Prayer.

She didn't want to admit that she didn't have any idea what he was talking about, so she spent a week reading her Bible and asking her friends about it. No one could help her.

She decided to go to church and ask her pastor about it. During the service she got her answer when he said, "Let us pray the prayer he taught us. Our father..."

:P

Joe

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