I Don't Know What To Do

[Guest Paula :)]

i'm having quite a down afternoon.

i'd love it if some of you lovely people on this forum would tell me what you did about work / employment before / during / after transitioning.

i just heard from a company that i went for an interview with last week and they've knocked me back. this after the people that actually interviewed me said my standard of work and experience spoke for itself and they would imagine i'd be back for a second interview. i was knocked back by their HR department.

i just don't know what to do. i'm really scared that i'll never find a company accepting enough to employ me. i've only been for 2 interviews since transitioning but i just can't help but think i would have been offered the job if i weren't trans. mind you, i am who i am.

so i'm sitting here crying my eyes out thinking i have no future. i'm scared.

paula

[Guest rachael1]

HI Paula,

Please don't cry I'm sure it will all work out in the end.

I'm in the closet so I haven't had to deal with what you are going through but feel for your deeply.

Have you thought of starting up your own business - possibly a franchise somewhere where you can be your own boss.

Then you can do the hiring and firing.

Hugs and kisses

Rachael

[Guest Paula :)]

thanks honey, i really appreciate your kindness. and that's a great idea too ...

paula x

[Guest androgynous]

Hi Paula!

What kind of work are you looking for? what is your passion (if you have one) or what do you like to do?

Me, I have my own company at home. IT, so that gives me freedom. I choose to do that, and I would never want anything else, despite the hours I make. But I guess everywhere there's something good & bad, all depends on what you want and how you feel about yourself. In my country it's unlawful to make gender distinction when applying for a job, the way it should be I guess.

Goodluck, and I know it's tough.

[Guest AllisonD]

i'm having quite a down afternoon.

i'd love it if some of you lovely people on this forum would tell me what you did about work / employment before / during / after transitioning.

i just heard from a company that i went for an interview with last week and they've knocked me back. this after the people that actually interviewed me said my standard of work and experience spoke for itself and they would imagine i'd be back for a second interview. i was knocked back by their HR department.

i just don't know what to do. i'm really scared that i'll never find a company accepting enough to employ me. i've only been for 2 interviews since transitioning but i just can't help but think i would have been offered the job if i weren't trans. mind you, i am who i am.

so i'm sitting here crying my eyes out thinking i have no future. i'm scared.

paula

Keep trying. I used to go on interviews just to see how I was doing when I last transitioned (I transitioned on the job). It was very educational and served as GREAT training. I didn't care what the job was for, I didn't want to change jobs, I was just looking for fresh feedback and 'grades' on how I was passing. A dozen interviews later I started getting offers. Finally took one even tho I really wasn't looking. Keep it up and use each one to improve your confidence and presentation skills. I used them for free trips to major cities (homes of defense contracting companies), which gave me lots of exposure to different environments. I learned from each trip, and all the expenses were paid by recruiters. Don't get concerned if it takes a dozen before you land what you want, and do go on as many as you can even if you aren't the least bit interested in the jobs. You will take very good advantage of the practice.

Allison

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Wrote you a PM.

Generally - it takes ten applications to get one interview and ten interviews to get one solid job opportunity. I used the internet aggressively. I tried every direction including head hunters (USA talk for hiring agencies). The resume' is the trick. Secondly a follow up - and several follow ups later, even if it seems you are being a pest. Most companies respect your interest, and it can keep you toward the top of the pile.

So I know - breaks your heart! You are really a good candidate and it seems that HR research is showing you as you are - and people are afraid of you, perhaps. But my post-op friends say its 10 times easier after full transition than it is trying to transition at work (my problem). And we CAN"T change who we are.

My therapist told me to start my own business. So I finally have a full time position, presenting in the wrong gender, but I am going to use that security to do exactly that, start up my own business. It's hard to fire yourself.

Please keep us updated! We care about you...

Lizzy

[Guest Angel21]

am sorry that you got knocked back for the job i hope you find the job that is for you soon

you are in my thoughts

Angel

[Sally]

I don't know, I may have to fire me, apparently I'm pretty much of a slacker!

That is a good idea in the right field.

Choose carefully in this economy.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Pioneer]

Aww It'll be okay. Don't be sad. : (

[Guest Ryles_D]

Starting up your own business might be a good idea- my partner and I are trying to start an online business. It's difficult, but it's also definitely true that you know you won't fire yourself over something like this!